Excuse me, I’m eating.


Over my lifetime, I’ve amassed a list of words and subjects that I’d rather not discuss while eating.  This includes dining out, eating dinner at home with my wife, with a large group, or even just snacking.

This especially applies to family gatherings.  For some reason, dinner conversation always comes around to operations, infections, and/or feces when I’m with my family, and oddly… this extends to my wife’s family too.

There are just some things I don’t want to think about or even hear mentioned while I’m shoveling food into my face.  I’m I alone in this?  Please tell me I’m not alone.  I can’t watch Dirty Jobs while I’m eating either.

Here’s a short list of words and subjects that I don’t want to hear while I’m eating…

  • Infection / Infected
  • Puss
  • Anything ending in “ectomy
  • Bloated
  • Operation
  • Poop, diarrhea, feces, shit, crap, etc.
  • Diaper (…especially when it leads to a discussion of use and/or contents.)
  • Vomit, “Throw up”, puke, regurgitate, etc.
  • Bile
  • “Soupy” describing anything other than soup.
  • Anything describing a recent doctor’s visit.
  • Anything describing a recent dentist visit.
  • Maggot
  • Blood
  • The word “Hospital”, because it never leads to anything good.

I’m sure there are more, but these are the most offensive.  What would you add to the list?

21 responses to “Excuse me, I’m eating.

  1. I am fully behind the total grossness of “soupy.”

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  2. Actually, none of it bothers me. I’m just in the habit of saying that we shouldn’t be speaking about such things.

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    • If you’re in the habit of saying it, then does that mean it comes up a lot…?

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      • I do have a 7 year old male living in my house. He does tend to wander off into “interesting” territory when he talks. It’s just part of raising him. haha

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        • Yeah, that’s totally different than when your mom, grandma, & aunts start talking about someone who has some organ removed because it was full of bile or some other disgusting liquid while you’re chowing down on chicken pot pie.

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  3. I’m pretty sure a psychologist would have a field day with this.🙂

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  4. Doesn’t really bother me at all. We often watch Dirty Jobs, CSI, etc. during dinner. By the way, which pronunciation of “puss” are you referring to?😉

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  5. …and how about “lanced” or “festering”?

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  6. Oh yeah, Dave & Jason need Gravatar.

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  7. I personally don’t mind those words being discussed during nom nom time.
    However, I pay the respect to others by not saying anything disgusting while they’re eating.

    Too many people just don’t realize how rude they really are…

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    • I dunno if it’s rudeness, or just people unattached to the thoughts behind the words. I think pretty visually sometimes… so when you say gross things, my mind goes right to images. Ha ha ha.

      Like

  8. Pingback: Crop-dusting for disgusting cell-phone roaches. | World (and Lunar) Domination

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