Youfest, Youapalooza, You’d Tour, or Youstock.

Just over a year ago, I tried out a blog post asking for your input.  It totally didn’t work.  No one tried it.  So I’m gonna try it myself, and you’re going to hopefully reply this time.  I think I have a few more regular readers now.  Here are the rules as I set forth before…

Okay.  You just found out that you’re secretly related to Oprah, and since she knows you’re a huge music fan… she’s letting you put together the concert of all concerts to celebrate.  Since you have Oprah money, you pretty much have no limit there, but you are limited to bands that are alive and actively together, or that you believe could be reasonably brought back together with a little grea$ing of the wheels.  Example… you’re probably not going to get Guns N’ RosesAppetite or (even the Illusions tour) lineup to get on stage together… but you probably could get Steven Tyler & Joe Perry in the same room.

Put together the whole thing…

  • The Venue: A small club?  A stadium or amphitheater?  Your living room?
  • The Run: Is it a one-night-only deal, or is this a 3-day festival?
  • The Name: Every killer show has to have a killer title.  No “w00t-stock”, please.
  • The Bands: Who’s playing & in what order?  Bonus points for linking to ‘em.
  • Added Insanity: Want a 20 minute drum solo with Neil Peart & Lars Ulrich?  Want an unplugged duet with Danzig & Shakira?  Want GWAR to disembowel you on the stage?  A guitar battle between Eric Clapton and Slash?  Want all the bands to do nothing but Black Sabbath covers?  Can’t hurt to throw the idea out there!
  • Micro-Manage: If you really want to get nuts, what do you want to see in each performer’s setlist?  Either highlights or the whole thing.

I’ll think about mine while you post yours in the comments below, and in a few days or so I’ll revisit the whole idea in another blog post.  Links to bands’ websites, videos, and music strongly encouraged!

Got it?  I’m working under that set of guidelines.

I’d have just 2 sages, going back-to back with maybe 10 minutes in between each set.  None of this bands playing at the same time crap like I’ve seen at some festivals where 2 of the 5 bands I came to see are playing at the same damn time.

I narrowed it down to 6 days with 10 bands each day.  I didn’t work out set times… and the order is more random than I’d like.  Pairing bands can be difficult.  One one hand similar stuff sometimes pairs well… on the other it sometimes gets boring.

My problem is that I like a lot of bands & they constantly go in & out of rotation.  I’m always forgetting & adding.  This list might change if I were to start it all over tomorrow.

I’d like to see all the bands in their current incarnations as per the rules.  I’ve seen some of them and they’re great live acts… I’d like to see what the others can do live.  And, of course, if I had Oprah money, I’d put my bands in there too.  Who wouldn’t?

I’d need 2 equal size stages… something like a parking lot venue where the crowd just turns around.

I’d call it AiXeLFest 3.0, because it would kind of be like Leonard Part 6.  No one would have remembered 1 or 2.  Well, some people would.

AiXeLFeSt 3.0

Band [ Stage # ] Why?

  • “Hit List”

Day 1

AiXeLsyD [Stage 1] Why not? You’d put your band on too, if you could, right?

The Legendary Hucklebucks [Stage 2] These guys are ridiculously entertaining. As for the Metallica cover, they played it live once and the crowd went NUTS.

Michale Graves [Stage 1] Dude works hard, writes some good stuff.  I’d like to hear some Graves & Gotham Road stuff… plugged in.

  • “Casket” (Graves)
  • “Creo Burn” (Gotham Road)
  • “Saturday Night” (Misfits)

Locksley [Stage 2] Killer live band that I’ve had the honor of playing with, and damn nice guys.

  • “The Whip”
  • “Darling, It’s True”
  • “Don’t Make Me Wait”

Enemy You [Stage 1] I have one of their albums and I need more.  It’s ridiculously catchy.

The Nobodys [Stage 2] These guys are hilarious potty mouths, and I bet they’d be a great show.

BARS [Stage 1] I can’t seem to find much about this band online. Did they even tour? Do they still exist?

Fist Fight in the Parking Lot [Stage 2] Prepare to have your face rocked off.  You can claim it later at the lost & found.

  • “Side Steppin’ Ninja”
  • “S&M”
  • “Something
Willie Nelson and his guitar "Trigger"

Willie Nelson and his guitar "Trigger" (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Willie Nelson [Stage 1] One of the coolest concerts I’ve ever seen was Willie Nelson.  The dude is a natural entertainer & such a great songwriter.

Motörhead [Stage 2] Have you seen the movie Lemmy?  Who wouldn’t want this guy to perform?  They rock harder than most bands can even imagine rocking.

  • “Ace of Spades”
  • “Sacrifice”
  • “Enter Sandman” (Metallica Cover)
  • “R.A.M.O.N.E.S.”

Day 2

Secrets Lie Within [Stage 1] These dudes are great friends that AiXeLsyD & Gasoline Dion played many shows with. I dig their sweet sugary sound.

Duncan Redmonds [Stage 2] The man is a genius. So many bands, so many songs.  His acoustic gigs look great on YouTube.  I’d like to hear stripped-down stuff from any of them.

I Voted For Kodos [Stage 1] Never had the pleasure of seeing them live.  They were a ska band, and then they weren’t, I think.  Ska is generally a fun time, and these dudes wrote some catchy songs.

Steel Panther [Stage 2] Why wouldn’t you want these guys at an almost week-long party?

The Misfits [Stage 1] At least someone is playing the songs.  I’d like to get as many of them as possible in one place and see either  a reconciliation or a brawl.

Reel Big Fish [Stage 2] One of the better bands I’ve seen live… they’re all kinds of crazy & fun.

  • “Beer”
  • “Everything Sucks”
  • “Another Day in Paradise” (Phil Collins cover)

Guns ‘n’ Wankers [Stage 1] I love the self-titled CD, it’s absolute genius.  Both versions.  I’d love to see this band live.

Mighty Mighty Bosstones [Stage 2] These guys are high-energy awesomeness live.  Must be that dude that just dances.

NOFX [Stage 1] I’d love to see them again.  They have an insane back-catalog of songs and I like most all of ‘em.

  • “Mattersville”
  • Woah on the Woahs”
  • “We Threw Gasoline On The Fire And Now We Have Stumps For Arms And No Eyebrows”
Flogging Molly performing live at Rams Head Li...

Flogging Molly performing live at Rams Head Live in Baltimore, MD (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Flogging Molly [Stage 2] Ridiculously awesome live show.  Ridiculously catchy easily accessible songs.  Ridiculous ability to get the crowd pumped.  I’d go see them any time I can.

Day 3

Gasoline Dion [Stage 1] Again, if you were doing it & had a band, you’d put yourself on too.  Or maybe I just have a big rockstar ego.

  • “Cold”
  • “Bitch Pants Opera”
  • “She Shits in Stereo”

Screeching Weasel [Stage 2] They’re the “hey those aren’t the Ramones?” of my generation.  I know they don’t play much.  I’d make them.

  • “Celena”
  • “Cool Kids”
  • “My Right”
  • “I Wanna Be Naked”

Ann Beretta [Stage 1] One of my favorite bands.  There was some kind of split, but Rob & Russ soldiered on to make more killer music.

  • “Bottlecaps”
  • “Love’s Easy Tears”
  • “Russ’ Song”
  • “Efforts Wasted”

800 Octane [Stage 2] Don’t know much about them other than I found them online many years ago & totally dug all their stuff.

Tom Green [Stage 1] Listen to this. This dude is a great rapper, and bound to be wildly entertaining and unpredictable. His Prepare for Impact album is incredible.

Dropkick Murphys [Stage 2] Great live show.  Catchy songs.  Celtic.  What more do you need?

  • “I’m Shipping Up to Boston”
  • “Amazing Grace” (Traditional)
  • “Dirty Glass”

ALL [Stage 1] ALL!  Oddly, I like ALL better than that other band that they’re almost all in.

Band of Skulls [Stage 2] I bought this album recently and couldn’t get it out of the CD player.  I kept letting it play.

The Offspring performing lite in Fortaleza, Br...

The Offspring performing lite in Fortaleza, Brazil, November 15th 2008 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Offspring [Stage 1] Another memorable live show.  These guys are pros all the way, and quite memorable.  I saw this tour where they had this “intermission” with bubble machines and inflatable furniture… it was hilarious.

  • “Total Immortal” (AFI Cover)
  • “Self Esteem”
  • “The Kids Aren’t Alright”
  • “Bad Habit”

Avenged Sevenfold [Stage 2] I liked this band the instant I heard them on a Hopeless Records comp.  Then, they blew up.  Good for them!

Day 4

Sing the Evens, Play the Odds [Stage 1] Fun fact: I named this band. They’d do it if I asked nicely. They were a killer live show & great friends.  I feel like they had another album in them somewhere.

The Bloody Seamen [Stage 2] You need to see this band.  Everyone needs to see this band.  What are you waiting for? Go!

The Eyeliners [Stage 1] Beautiful girls playing poppy punk rock songs with mad skills?  I’m in. Gel is one of my favorite guitarists!

  • “Destroy” (an appearance by Joan Jett would be killer!)
  • “Think of Me”
  • “Do The Zombie”

Transplants [Stage 2] I liked the first album, and I’d love to see how they do it live.

Marky Ramone’s Blitzkrieg [Stage 1] This has to be a great show.  I wanna hear all these Ramones Songs.  Marky is a space cadet.

  • “When We Were Angels”
  • “Pet Sematary” (Ramones)
  • “R.A.M.O.N.E.S.” (Motörhead Cover)
  • “Bop ‘Til You Drop” (Ramones)

Me First and the Gimme Gimmes [Stage 2] They’ve got to be a great time.  They were booed at PNC Park once because Yinzers are dumb.  They need to come back to an appreciative audience.

  • “Country Roads” (John Denver cover)
  • “One Tin Soilder” (Original Caste cover)
  • “Goodbye Earl” (The Dixie Chicks cover)
  • “Hello” (Lionel Richie cover)

Poison [Stage 1] Balk or scoff if you want, but I’ve seen them a few times, and they’re a great light-hearted rock n’ roll show.  Brett Michaels & CC DeVille are great entertainers.

Beastie Boys [Stage 2] I’ve never seen them live, but I’d love to.  They are incredible at defining what they do, and then doing it.

Velvet Revolver [Stage 1] Their records are over-produced, but they’re a great dirty live rock band.  I don’t care if it’s Wieland or whoever the new guy will be.

  • “Set Me Free”
  • “Slither”
  • “Negative Creep” (Nirvana cover)
  • “Mr. Brownstone” (Guns N’ Roses)
Prince playing at Coachella 2008.

Prince playing at Coachella 2008. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Prince [Stage 2] Absolute genius.  Incredibly insane.  I’d love to see this in action.  Ever see Purple Rain?  If he brought out Morris Day & the Time for a few, it would also be incredible.

Day 5

Exclusion Principle|45 min.|1|My favorite local band ever?  Probably.  These dudes gigged with AiXeLsyD all the time, and were awesome.  For Oprah money, I want a recording too.

Bastard Bearded Irishmen [Stage 2] If you live in the burgh, are at all of fan of Celtic stuff, and haven’t seen them… please kick your own ass now.

  • “In Heaven There Is No Beer” (Ernst Neubach & Ralph Maria Siegel cover)
  • “Drinkem’, Drankem, Drunkem’ “
  • “Black Velvet Band” (traditional)
  • “Float” (Flogging Molly cover)

Dethlehem [Stage 1] If any orcs show up to this gig, these guys will have it covered.  They also slay eardrums with magical sweeping.

The Unseen [Stage 2] These guys are a great live show.  I’m not sure who’s even in the band any more.  High energy songs, high energy show.

Omegalord [Stage 1] “Not. Gonna. Die.  …With bullets in my gun!”  Badass biker metal like Motörhead meets Black Sabbath, cool live show.  Oprah money may convince them to reunite.

Nerf Herder [Stage 2] Hilarious songs, great hooks, and goofy premises…  I wish this band churned out more albums & toured more.

Tenacious D [Stage 1] These guys are awesome.  With Dave Grohl on Drums and or additional guitar it would rock that much harder.

Dr. Dre [Stage 2] Musical genius.  Lyrical genius.  Production genius. Marketing genius. Hasn’t made kid movies.  I’d like to see Ice Cube, Eminem, MC Ren, DJ Yella, & Snoop do some guest spots.

  • “Nuthin’ but a ‘G’ Thang”
  • “Natural Born Killaz” (Dr. Dre & Ice Cube)
  • “Keep Their Heads Ringin'”
  • “Straight Outta Compton” (N.W.A.)
Slash playing a show with Velvet Revolver

Slash playing a show with Velvet Revolver (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Slash, Miles Kennedy, & the Conspirators [Stage 1] Slash & Miles Kennedy go well together.  They ought to keep doing it.  Slash digs his touring band.  They ought to keep doing it.  I need to see this band if/when they come through the ‘Burgh.  Slash has a great body of songs to pull from.

  • “Back & Forth Again” (Slash’s Snakepit)
  • “Starlight”
  • “Rocket Queen” (Guns N’ Roses)
  • “Ghost”

Aerosmith [Stage 2] I’ve never seen them, I’d like to before someone dies or they hate each other forever (again).  I bet it’s a hell of a show.

  • “Mama Kin”
  • “Walk This Way”
  • “Big Ten Inch Record”
  • “Love in an Elevator”
  • “Train Kept A-Rollin'” (Tiny Bradshaw cover)

Day 6

Ernie and the Berts [Stage 1] Yup.  I was in too many bands, and I self-promote way too much.

Peelander-Z playing at the Asian Heritage cele...

Peelander-Z playing at the Asian Heritage celebration in New York at LaGuardia Community College (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Peelander-Z [Stage 2] These guys are pretty much inexplicable as a live act.  It’s an experience.  It’s like you’re on another planet.  There’s so much interaction & participation, it’s hardly like watching a band… it’s like being in one.

The Bloodhound Gang [Stage 1] Such a fun live show.  It’s like a dirty dirty potty-humor filled  circus.

  • “It’s Tricky”
  • “Mope”
  • “Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss”

The Sword [Stage 2] These guys are so heavy, they might cause the stage to collapse.  These are the coolest riffs you’ll get outside of a Sabbath album.

AFI [Stage 1] So many different sounds, and I like them all.  I caught the very end of their set once at a Warped Tour.  I’d like to see a full set.

  • “I Wanna Get A Mohawk (But Mom Won’t Let Me Get One)”
  • “Totalimmortal”
  • “Kill Caustic”
  • “Days of the Phoenix”
The Drummer is the main vocals. Can't think of...

SNUFF: The Drummer is the main vocals. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Snuff [Stage 2] Such a great band.  So many albums, so many songs, so many related projects, and I love them all.  They need to come to the US so I can see them!

Rancid [Stage 1] So catchy, great live band, and all kinds of fun.  Rancid is a great gateway into ska & punk rock.

Danzig [Stage 2] Badassery abounds from the great tiny one.  If only Danzig could learn to not take himself so seriously.  Great live show though!

Green Day [Stage 1] I’ve never seen them live.  I’d love to.  I enjoy many of their albums & have for quite some time. They’ve become incredibly successful just doing what they do.

  • “2,000 Light Years Away”
  • “She”
  • “F.O.D.”
  • “Church on Sunday”

Metallica [Stage 2] METALLICA!  Even without Jason Newsted, and even after a few blah albums… I’d like to see them again.  They’re still THE metal band.

Son of Sam would be cool too if Davey Havok were to sing… or a Samhain reunion, or even the Teen Idols or The Donnas.  Then there’s, Lars Frederiksen and the Bastards, The Foo Fighters, Psychostick, Green Jellÿ, The Aquabats, The Phenomenauts, Head Cat, Sixer, Warp 11, The Distillers, Weird Al, Electric Eel Shock, and so many others..  I could easily add another day & lots more locals like The Cheats, Undercover Saints, Scratch ‘n Sniffs, Trash Magnet, Black Casket, maybe even Anti-Flag.  Maybe we could reunite the Satanic Bat?

I wonder how much money or money to a charity it would take to get Ozzy Osborne, Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler, and Bill Ward all to get on stage together?  Think I could get Dave back into Sum 41?  Then there’s Duff McKagan’s Loaded or Izzy Stradlin (& maybe even the Ju Ju Hounds).  Could I pay enough to bring Bobby Steele and The Undead out of retirement or for Danzig to play with John Christ, Chuck Biscuits, & Eerie Von?  Maybe a Pinhead Gunpowder or The Network appearance could happen?  I like the weird/quirky stuff.

I’d like to see all the bands in their current incarnations as per the rules.  I’ve seen some of them and they’re great live acts… I’d like to see what the others can do live.  And, of course, if I had Oprah money, I’d put my bands in there too.  Who wouldn’t?

As far as the “hits”, I tried to include rare stuff or stuff that I’d go just nuts without hearing.

So that’s my list.  Today.  Obviously, I find it hard to narrow down.  Now, make your own!  You don’t have to get as detailed as me.  You can list your favorites in the comments below.  You could post it on your own blog or as a Facebook note & keep it going.

Would you come to my show?

13 thoughts on “Youfest, Youapalooza, You’d Tour, or Youstock.

  1. Wow, that is one hell of a list!

    For me, first things first… if I had Oprahesque amounts of cash, I would buy the bar next to my house. It’s currently a private club, and every person that goes there is an obnoxious asshole. I’d buy it and shut it down and then reopen my OWN bar there. Since I now own a bar, and I am no longer worried about making money, I’d quit my job, form the band I’ve always dreamed of forming, then I’d hire us as the house band. Other bands could play there too, but my band would perform as often as we wanted to. As an added bonus, I’d also now own the parking lot between that bar and my house, so I’d never have to worry about not having enough parking for visitors anymore either. Yeah, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this.

    Anyway, the name I would like to use for my bar is probably “Club Inferno” (and it’d be decorated just like the nightclub by the same name in the Squirrel Nut Zippers video for the song “Hell” … I’d have them come play there, too, because it would be awesome and surreal. But that would be a separate occasion. For the music festival you are asking about, I’d probably call it something like Club Inferno Festival (an homage to Norway’s Inferno Festival).

    So… there’s the groundwork. I want to think about this a little longer (and see if those links work?) before I post any more.


    • Thanks for the quick reply. No one played before, so I hoped putting it all out there sparked some interest.

      I’d also love to own/run a bar or all ages club for national touring and local bands.

      Who would you like to go see at an all-day event?


      • Club Inferno Festival would have to be headlined by some (but not all) of my favorite bands. It would probably end up being at least two or three days long.

        Not Invited:

        Pink Floyd – although they’re easily my favorite band ever, I accept the fact that they’re done. I was ok with the line-up minus Roger Waters, who strikes me as kind of a D-bag anyhow, and I was very sad that I missed out on seeing them in ’94 when they came to Pittsburgh (miscommunication with a friend, then the tickets were already sold out), and furthermore I thought it was really cool the four longest-tenured members got together for that Live Aid thing a few years back. But then Rick Wright died soon after that, and the other guys made it clear that they aren’t going to do it anymore. I’m okay with that.
        Black Sabbath – I hope Tony is able to fight off the health problems he’s dealing with, and that Bill can sort things out with the other guys. But I have no interest in seeing any of them anymore. They made about half a dozen of the best albums ever – like forty years ago. I saw them in ’97 without Bill Ward and in ’01 with him, and both times were hugely disappointing. Plus, as I’ve gotten older, my tolerance for Ozzy has really diminished (as a singer and as a person, both). So no thank you.
        Alice in Chains – the death of Mike Starr was sad, especially considering the circumstances, but not a deal-breaker for me. He’d already been replaced fifteen years earlier, although I definitely preferred the band’s earlier work. But no, when Layne died, Alice in Chains died, to me. I refuse to acknowledge the newer incarnation of this band as legitimate. I mean, they’ve got about as much right to call themselves Alice in Chains as Spys4Darwin. Whatever.
        White Zombie – I know the last line-up of this band is all still around, but I can’t stand John Tempesta or anything he’s been a part of. So I’d want the La Sexorcisto line-up, although I haven’t heard anything about Ivan DePrume since that time. Assuming he’s still healthy and able to get behind a drum set, though, I’d still be hesitant because of Rob. Things were already going sour by the time this band dissolved, but as a solo artist, he has been so terrible, I don’t know if he could ever get back to the style of music they used to play. Maybe they could get back together without him. Perhhaps Al Jourgensen could fill in. If I was Oprah rich I could make that happen.

        As for the actual headliners…

        Faith No More – no question. They’ve been doing this reunion thing for almost three years, there is no reason why they can’t come to the Burgh. Except I’d bring in Chuck Mosely to sing his own songs. I heard he appeared with them on one of their shows, so I want that too. And with Oprah’s money I’d hire a private investigator to sniff out wherever Jim Martin has been hiding all these years, I’d definitely want him in the band too. Then he could also reprise his role when they make the new Bill and Ted movie.
        Tool – for the most part I’m assembling a list of people I haven’t seen – and in most cases won’t be able to see. Tool tours here occasionally, and I’ve already seen them three times, but they put on such an awesome show, I’d be mad at myself it I didn’t invite them.
        Phish – on the subject of people I’ve seen, and who can put on a tremendous show. And it’d be indoors, so they can use their light show too. I saw them at the Civic Arena back when it was called that, and it was amazing. But they’ll be playing in my bar, which has a strict zero-tolerance rule about hippies. The reason why I don’t like this band more than I do (or see them play anymore) is the stupid fans.
        Hum – as far as I know, these guys went their separate ways after Downward is Heavenward, which I think is really a shame. The most underrated band of all time, bar none. If they had more material to draw from, I’d get them to play sets on every night of the festival. Maybe I would, anyway. They could play all of Downward and then run through You’d Prefer an Astronaut twice. No complaints here, that album is always on my desert island list no matter how small the list is.
        Radiohead – I am not a big fan of theirs, but only because they went so weirdo crazy. I’ve heard they refuse to play anything from Pablo Honey, but I’d insist on it. Although Thom Yorke seems like the kind of person who wouldn’t abandon his conviction for any amount of money, and if that’s the case I’d have to respect that. Maybe they could at least pull out “Stop Whispering” and then do the rest of their set from The Bends. But as soon as they try to use any goofy computer sound effect noises, I’m pulling the plug. It’s my bar and my festival, damnit.
        Soundgarden – here’s another one that’s been playing reunion shows. I never got the chance before, so I’d want to bring them in too. But I’d have to ban “Black Hole Sun” because I’m sick to death of that song. Depending on my mood, I might ask them to play ONLY songs from Badmotorfinger and earlier. Except they could do “Ty Cobb” as an encore.

        Wow, planning festivals can be a lot of work! That should do it for headliners. To be continued…


        • Wow, that’s a hell of a list. I’d love to see Sabbath if I had the chance, but I can see not wanting them to try to recapture former magic.

          I have seen Faith No More, opening for the Metallica/Guns N’ Roses tour way back… and they were actually quite terrible that day. Ha ha. I’d like to see them again, as I really dig their stuff.

          I can’t get behind Phish or Radiohead, but I can see why they have such a big following and I respect them for that.

          HUM… I’ve heard of them, but I can’t think of their stuff.


      • As for the rest of the bands, I just realized it would probably take me several days just to list them all. I’d probably simplify things by hiring somebody to go through my Facebook account and contact every band in my list of “likes”. There are probably a thousand or two.

        I’d be happy with any number of those showing up — a nice mix of nationally/internationally well-known acts (i.e. Ghost, Graveyard, Arkona again, probably Slayer just for good measure, etc. etc.); some local friends (Ernie and the Berts of course, Morguemart, Molasses Barge, probably everybody on the Iron Atrocity cd… oh yeah and definitely Crayon Death!! I’d for sure want to reunite those guys, plus tons more), as well as some smaller international bands that I don’t actually expect to have the opportunity to see without having access to the hypothetical endless wealth we’re talking about here (like Talbot from Estonia, Kongh and Yggdrasilfrom Sweden, Ever Circling Wolves from Finland, Heidevolk and Mondvolland from Holland, Barbarian Prophecies from Galicia, just to name a couple…).


  2. Okay, first of all I would absolutely come to your show! I’d love to see Steel Panthers live and Aerosmith is always a good time!
    So here’s my dream show (forgive me if my attempts at making since links fail, as I had to look up how to do it without the little chain link button I love so much!)
    I think I would call my show the Mostly Philly Fest since most of my favorite concerts have been local acts. I’d have it at the TLA on South Street in Philadelphia. I love the atmosphere there, and since it’s an old theater and the floor slopes down towards the stage you never have to worry about being stuck standing behind some guy with a big head that blocks your view.
    I’d want my opening act to be the hilarious Don McCloskey, and he’d have to perform King of Discount Ho’s .
    Next up a band that is not broken up but not “currently active” as they put it – Tapping the Vein . Awesome female lead singer!
    Then a band that is no longer together – Jealousy Curve. I saw them perform with the next band I’m going to list and it was one of the best shows I’ve ever been to. A must play is Black Widow .
    Following them would be yet another defunct band (WTF?!) – and my all time favorite local act – Silvertide! This is just straight up rock and roll, and the lead singer Walt Lafty is so much fun to watch! I’d also make them play a song from a band formed by Lafty and the bassist after Silvertide broke up called Automatic Fire (they broke up too – Seriously?). Their song What Are You Made Of? never fails to kick my ass.
    The headliner (and the not so Philly part – although they did get their start in the same state) is Fuel. I have seen them 9 times and have NEVER been disappointed. I want Brett Scallions, Carl Bell, Jeff Abercrombie and Kevin Miller. I want them to play everything from Porcelain, Sunburn and Something Like Human, plus “Falls on Me” and “Die Like This” from Natural Selection. Also, their cover of Elton John’s “Daniel”. Their last song has to be Ozone since it’s my favorite Fuel song.

    Oh, and if Oprah’s money could convince Brett to leave his wife and run away with me to the private island I just bought, that’d be cool too…


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