Go to Best Buy and set all the alarms to go off, right now.


Did you read the email that I sent to them?

I see this email reply as an (incredibly boring) invitation to go in to your local Best Buy & monkey around with everything.  Especially the alarm clocks.  Does Best Buy even sell alarm clocks any more?  If they do, do set them all to go off at weird intervals after hours… or even 10 or 15 minutes before they close.  If they’re clock radios, put them on the classical station or talk radio.  Do it on the demo cell phones if you can too.

This was their only [yawn] reply:

From: online.communities <online.communities@bestbuy.com>
Date: Fri, Jun 8, 2012 at 12:05 PM
Subject: RE: A Formal Apology
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

Hello,

We always encourage you, our customer, to come in and look around or even test out our products, so you know what you like or don’t like about them. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us and I’ll be sure to pass this along to our Leadership Team.

Respectfully,
Justin|Community Connector
Corporate Campus
Online.Communities@BestBuy.com

I guess they didn’t “get” it, or find it amusing.  Of course setting all the alarm clocks is an innocuous thing to do at best, but I was acting like it was a big deal.  That’s why (I thought) it was funny.  Wow.  Best Buy popped my funny balloon.

What a boring dud.

English: Vintage clock radio

English: Vintage clock radio (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

<shameless plug> Oh yeah, while you’re at it… set all the browsers to http://www.ErnieAndTheBerts.com, too. </shameless plug>

Best Buy, Bed Bath & Beyond, Beeps, & Buzzers ⌨


Well, I sent what I thought were going to be two rather fun emails, but they have both gone unanswered.  Wow.  What a giant dud.  As my wife constantly reminds me, I certainly find myself amusing.  So, in that spirit I thought I’d share these emails anyway.  Perhaps you’ll chuckle too.

The first was to Best Buy via their form online and to the Twelpforce email address:

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, May 31, 2012
Subject: A Formal Apology
To: twelpforce@bestbuy.com

Greetings Best Buy Associates,

I write to you today to offer a formal apology.  I have lived with guilt for many years, and I would like to be able to clear my conscience.  Sadly, you literally asked for what you got, but you certainly didn’t deserve it my friends.  I beg you in advance to not unleash the wrath of the Twelpforce or Geek Squad upon my humble self.

Do you remember the commercials from about ten or so years ago that begged one to come in & play with all of the electronics in the store?  Well, I said you asked for it.  You did.  I simply complied.

I went into one of your stores, and tried my best to restrain my maniacal laughter as I set all of the alarm clocks & clock radios to go off at different intervals after the store closed.  Some were 5 minutes, some where 10 or even 20.  It was incredibly hard to stifle my giggles and pretend like I was incredibly interested in these timepieces.  I don’t know how no one noticed.  Now I can’t get 10 feet into a Best Buy door without a blue-shirted hawk swooping in to ask if I need help, and I’ll get asked every 3 feet after that if I turn it down.  Perhaps shenanigans like mine are why?

At one time, I wished that I could have been around to see the chaos.  Okay, maybe I still do.  Perhaps a master switch would have cut the power to all of them after the first one went off.  I won’t pretend to know the internal machinations of such a colossal retail empire.  Perhaps I made a memory for that team and brought them together through adversity in the name of silencing alarm clocks.  Perhaps it is a good story to tell trainees, or it may have even been forgotten over time.  I was much younger & more brash then.  I thought I knew everything.  I thought the world was my playground. To be blunt, I was an arrogant young miscreant.  I don’t remember if it was planned, or spur of the moment.

I’m sure that when the internet was still “new”, I set more than a few of your browsers to my old band’s web page & walked away.  I did this in every store though, not just Best Buy.  I won’t apologize for that.  A pimp’s got to pimp, right?

I would like to offer an apology to Best Buy as a corporation, the Best Buy employees startled and/or annoyed that day (and their families), and to all of the Best Buy associates that have joined the team since that day (somewhere between 2000 and 2002).  I believe this was at the Greensburg PA location across from Westmoreland Mall.  Please pass this along to them, if there are any left that may have been working that day.  I have seen the err of my ways, and I can live with the guilt no longer!

Thank you for your time, I hope you find it within you to pass along forgiveness for this egregious behavior.

Regretfully,
-Waldo Lunar

The next one was to Bed Bath & Beyond via their webform:

Do you remember those Best Buy commercials from 10 or so years ago where they asked you to come in & try the stuff out?

I did.  I went in one night & set all of their alarm clocks to go off about 5, 10, 15, or 20 minutes after closing.  I bet it was hilarious.  I only wish I had been there to see it.  I bet that happened often.

I noticed that you have a lot of kitchen timers and egg timers.  What time do you close?

Thanks,
-Waldo

I thought it was funny.  Apparently Best Buy and Bed Bath & Beyond did not.  I did get the standard “we got your message, someone will write back with in 3 days” replies, over a week ago.  I really thought Best Buy would come out with a witty intelligent retort.  You’d think an electronics company would be helmed by geeks who found humor in such ridiculousness.  Bed Bath & Beyond apparently do not go too far into the beyond part.  Oh well.

Best Buy

Best Buy (Photo credit: Ron Dauphin)

English: A Bed Bath and Beyond store in a shop...

Bed Bath and Beyond (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

AskCensus | A response on the ACS from the US Census Bureau:


So, out of all the people that I asked about the American Community Survey, none are so relevant as the U.S. Census Bureau itself.  After all, they’re the ones who put it out.  While PA State Rep. John Maher’s response is insightful and amusing, and the Spencarian’s Benjamin Kirby offers a different perspective… only the Census Bureau can comment officially.  It took me slightly longer than their professed 2-day response time to get back to me, but I’m sure they have better things to do than respond to some goofy idiot with pseudonym and an email account.  Also to be fair, they did kind of address my concerns on the FAQ.  I was just a little more long-winded about it.

Well, without further adieu, here’s what they had to say…

– ☞⌨☜ –

from: AskCensus <askcensus@custhelp.com>
reply-to: AskCensus <askcensus@custhelp.com>
to: recrat.demopublican@gmail.com
date: Thu, Oct 28, 2010
subject: The American Community Survey? [Incident: 000000-000000]

Recently you requested personal assistance from our on-line support center. Below is a summary of your request and our response.

If this issue is not resolved to your satisfaction, you may reopen it within the next 0 days.

Thank you for allowing us to be of service to you.

To access your question from our support site, click here.

Subject
The American Community Survey?
Discussion Thread
Response (ACSO – SLH) 10/28/2010 16:21
Thank you for using the US Census Bureau’s Question & Answer Center.  

We appreciate your feedback regarding the U.S. Census Bureau’s American Community Survey. You make many valid points and in a world free of people too busy to respond we could easily get by with one mailing. As it is, our research has shown better response results from multiple mailings and reminder cards and for this program using multiple mailings to get someone to respond to the paper questionnaire is cheaper than obtaining the information by phone or personal visit.

As for the Internet response option we are in the development and testing phase for this application. The Director of the Census Bureau, Dr. Groves, supports this project not only for the ACS but also for the 2020 Census.

As for reducing the time burden on the American public, the director is dedicating resources to researching adminstrative/alternative sources for the information collected on the ACS and Census forms.

If you need more information or have further questions about the ACS, please call our Customer Services Center on 1 (800) 923-8282.

Question Reference #000000-000000
Escalation Level: 16 hours from created
Category Level 1: American Community Survey
Date Created: 10/20/2010 10:49
Last Updated: 10/28/2010 16:21
Status: Solved PII (Admin)
Cc:

[—000:000000:00000—]

– ☞⌨☜ –

Well, that was certainly bland, but at least they are looking to technological advances in the future.  I still see this statement as crazy: “…for this program using multiple mailings to get someone to respond to the paper questionnaire is cheaper than obtaining the information by phone or personal visit.”  I’d love to see that on paper.  (Or better yet, in an email.)