Christmas Playlist 2020


I posted not too long ago about Christmas playlists on various platforms. Ultimately most of them are frustrating because you can’t just pick a song order without signing up for a “premium” account. I’m already subscribed to enough stuff.

I have other YouTube lists (Naughty & Nice), but I decided to pull some of my favorites and put them all on one:

Christmas 2020 塔賅

What great ones am I missing? Drop them in the comments below!

While you’re on my YouTube Channel, don’t forget to watch, give a like, and drop a comment for “Jingle Bells” by the Christmas Carrolls! We have over 400 views already, it would be cool to hit 500 by Christmas! Please share it on your social media platform of choice.

Guitar-Related Facebook Forum Bingo!


Back in the day, I used to go to websites, message boards, chat rooms, or forums, & blogs. Now it’s mostly Facebook groups.

I’m a simple man. When not enjoying real-life things like family time, noodling poorly on the guitar, drawing mazes, or watching some funny or sci-fi-ish stuff on the TV, I enjoy reading things on the internet. This would include subjects like guitars, gear, guitars, music, Star Wars, guitars, guitars, and surprisingly enough …Guitars.

Picking up a theme? I’m in some guitar groups of varying purpose, from celebrating the instrument in general, to celebrating ugly ones, celebrating cheap ones, celebrating unique ones, alternating between building camaraderie or trolling between fellow guitarists, and making fun off bass players & drummers. I may have G.A.S. – It’s gotta be a real thing.

After a while, you start to notice a repetitive pattern of seemingly-canned responses.

At first, I thought of a drinking game. But, I’m too old for that, and I’m currently on antibiotics. Ha ha.

Bingo then? I made two crude BINGO cards with some free online help from My Free Bingo Cards and Bingo Baker,

It may seem light a slight, but it’s not. I’m in there. I have said the thigs. I have typed the things. I have read the things. I have heard the things. We all have a common interest. This is a celebration of you, & us.

How quickly could you get a line, or even fill up the card?

What responses have I missed?

Please, elaborate in the comments.

What would go on your Bingo card or cause you to take a drink?

What do I need to add to my pin boards?

I would love to hear what you have to add.

What are your favorite places to discuss and ogle guitars on Facebook or online in general? You can even share some of your favorite guitar photos or memes in the comments.

You may want to take a look at the Guitars & My Guitars categories here at the blog.

Christmas Playlists and Streaming Services


I am signed up for too many free streaming accounts. I like raucous punk and metal Christmas music in addition to some of the more straightforward poppy and traditional stuff. I wish that all of these songs were available across all platforms. I have some stuff from the wild west days of mp3 downloading that I can’t seem to find on any platforms.

Christmas Playlists | Spotify  Amazon Music  Pandora  YouTube
Christmas Playlists | Spotify Amazon Music Pandora YouTube

I do need to work on refining the lists I have. The YouTubes ones are all over the place. I hardly use Pandora enough to thumbs up or down to get it where every song is a smash. Spotify and Amazon are the ones that are easy to use… but I wish I could add more content.

I do have the free accounts for all mentioned. I don’t feel like playing for a streaming service unless it can be complete. I heard Google Music was pretty awesome, until it just became the YouTube Music thing. I need to get my personal stuff all digitized someday too. Man, I miss just running WinAmp on a giant desktop.

What do you use to listen to Christmas music? What are your favorite songs, traditional, wild, overplayed, or obscure?

Here are mine:

Spotify | Christmas 賅

Amazon Music | Christmas

(WordPress doesn’t seem to want to embed the Amazon playlist.)

Pandora | Holiday Rock N’ Roll

https://www.pandora.com/station/1758025359576278863

(WordPress won’t embed Pandora I guess, either.)

YouTube | Christmas Playlist – Nice

YouTube | Christmas Playlist – Nice

YouTube | 抽徉砂 Christmas Songs 抽徉砂

An Interview With the Mad Mastermind Behind the Indy Custom FlyCaster


The Indy Custom FlyCaster

My Indy Custom FlyCaster

If you’re a regular reader, you know I recently posted all my guitars. You would then also know that I like weird guitars. You may have even seen me in a guitar-related Facebook group defending this beauty of an axe. What is not to love? The thing is fantastic. It is a sight to behold. It probably shouldn’t even exist, but it does an I needed to have it.

Mine is serial number 059. I have even connected with a few other owners out there via a Facebook Fan Page. I had expected to swap out pickups and drop in some rails… but, man this thing sounds beautiful. The neck feels great. It hangs well when standing. It is just a great damn guitar.

I would say it is probably in my trifecta of ire along with the Dewey Decibel FlipOut and the Galveston B.B. Stone. I have had people at shows come up just to tell me that they hate them! Ha ha. It amazes me that a music genre predicated on the idea of just pissing off the previous generation has so many purists who must adhere to some sort of imaginary rules of guitar design. and tired traditions. It would be a fascinating sociological study to see exactly how that can be. It’s OK to enjoy the classics and get a little wild sometimes.

Of course, many people get the joke and love them too.

In with posting All My Axes (did you see parts 1 & 2?), I really got to wanting to dive deep into the story behind each of these if I could. The creator of the FLyCaster, Jimmie Bruhn was easy to find online, and seems like a great guy. I would even say he found me in an “ugly guitars” group or two. Check out my questions for him and his fantastic answers below my embedded Instagram Post of the FlyCaster. The interview was conducted via the highly professional Facebook Messenger.

 

AiXeLsyD13: Who is Indiana Custom Guitars?

Jimmie Bruhn: There was no Indiana Custom Guitars. Indy Custom was that particular brand. Its actually a much bigger thing SHS International was the parent company. It was an international music wholesale company that distributed products to music stores. Its where music stores nationwide (and globally) got a lot of their stuff. We designed, imported and sold products. Here are some of the following brands of SHS International (this is not the full list but the highlights)

Morgan Monroe Bluegrass Instruments
Eddy Finn Ukulele Company
Indiana Guitar Company
Indy Custom Guitars
ModTone Guitar Effects
Bean Blossom Instruments
Tune Tech Tuners
SHS Audio
Devlin Guitars
College Guitar Company
Sundown Amplifiers

I worked as a media producer for the company for close to 30 years and my fingerprints were on most everything from every brand. I wore many many different hats and guitar design was a tiny part of it. Fun but it wasnt the bulk of what I did. That’s a whole other story. Suffice to say, anything you saw from any of those brands, I had a major role in bringing to life.

In addition Ive played professionally for a long long time. Im a writer, singer and I play a lot of different instruments. Guitar is one part of it but probably the biggest part as I am a lifelong collector and nerd. The collection is out of hand but I simply cant help myself. I still have my first guitar. I never get rid of anything! You can hear and see my work on YouTube. Oh她ne other thing夷f you ever see Indy Custom Relic guitars, that was me. A one man side business I started where I produced over 400 hand relic’ed guitars. In that time I still played all the time, traveled and played all over.

嗯: Do they have a website?

JB: Not any more.

嗯: Do you have a website you’d like me to link to?

JB: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC36We-7C4ghOW5tlsG0G-tQ (Jimmie Bruhn’s Jam TV!) This is a place for my various artistic ideas. A little of this, a little of that…you never know what you’re going to get.

嗯: How did you come to be a guitar designer? Have you designed any other guitars?

JB: Ive been collecting guitars for over 40 years. It was natural that my need to build and tinker with stuff would spill over into my professional day gig.
Yes, I designed many guitars and would then send my renderings to the factory for prototypes and then on to a bigger run of them. When I say designed I in no way want to make it seem that I am some schooled luthier or anything of the sort. I just came up with designs and through trial and error, we would arrive at something unique but I wasnt in a workshop running a saw!

嗯: How was the Indy Custom label to be different?

JB: By trying to get the best things we all liked about particular models into an affordable recreation that was a Big Bang for the buck. There were some really cool models that came out. I cant say exactly how many but there were lots of designs over the life of that line.

嗯: I know you were in part inspired by the Zakk Wylde guitars with an SG top & a V bottom did anything else go into it?

JB: Yes, comedy. It just made me laugh. Another thing that REALLY inspired it were people around the company who were genuinely disgusted by it. That made me want to get them produced even more. Yes, it was stupid, yes it was hideous but I knew it could get a lot of attention for the rest of the line. The powers that be couldnt see the value in that but here we are all these years later still talking about it. ZERO advertising dollars spent. I wasnt wrong!

嗯: Was it a hard sell getting in into production? (Convincing everyone else at the company/factory to go with it?)

JB: Some understood. Some did not. The ones that didnt inspired me to push that much harder. The point was, good or bad夷t was getting a major reaction. The only bad press is no press.

嗯: Where was it manufactured?

JB: These were all manufactured in China once final prototypes were approved.

嗯: Were there any issues with manufacturing? (Seems like a big body to be on a manufacturing line.)

JB: There are always issues in manufacturing especially trying to do it from thousands of miles away. Visiting the factories can keep quality control in check but ultimately once production starts things can go wrong. Not always, but that potential is there. Overall, there were no problems in the Flycaster. Even my Chinese contact remarked that the guys on the factory floor thought it was a weird guitar which meant even a cultural and language barrier cannot deny that The Flycaster is globally offensive!

嗯: Why “FlyCaster?” Everyone who sees it calls it a TV or a Tele-V. Ha ha. Was that by design?

JB: Because it needed a name, an identity. Plus it had some weird fishing connection so

嗯: Why 100? Why not 200 or 50? Were they all sold?

JB: The idea was that we would only do limited runs of guitars for the Indy Custom line which we did on other models besides The Flycaster. I think they may have even commissioned a second small batch to fill an order. The dealers that understood the value liked them and they helped bring attention to the other models. Limiting them to 100 kept it fresh and helped if a particular model completely tanked. That way you arent stuck with so many. If its a hit? Make more! Yes, they were all sold.

嗯: I love mine. I love that it just seems to enrage purists, and it just “outs” so many people as not having any sense of humor or whimsy. Was any if this in your original intent?

JB: This was absolutely the intent from the beginning. I love music, I love comedy and this thing was both. It was just so incredibly stupid that one has to laugh or at least, I did! The ones that were truly offended because they had such a death grip on tradition well, as previously stated, that just fueled my fire!

嗯: Why are so many guitarists stuck in traditional designs and setups, when rock n’ roll at its core is about rebellion?

JB: Because they are either afraid or dont have the slightest concept of being original. They are too worried what other people think.

Double FlyCasters!

Image Provided by Jimmie Bruhn, from his digital book.

嗯: I know one burst prototype exists. Do you ever play it?

JB: I play it occasionally but I see it every day as its hanging on the wall of my studio.

嗯: Did you ever have any other color schemes in mind? I would love one with an antigua finish!

JB: I wanted it to get to that point but those in control saw otherwise.

嗯: Do you have a guitar collection? What are your non-FlyCaster favorites?

JB: Yes. I have a pretty big collection. Its fairly insane. I have everything from top shelf vintage stuff to weird a wacky. Lots of stuff I built in the shop, some wonderful mutts and some serious collector stuff too. As I said, I never get rid of anything. I come from a musical family.

嗯: Have you seen any other weird guitars out there & thought “I wish I came up with that!”?

JB: All the time! That’s the great thing for me about the world of guitars, its constantly evolving. There are some absolutely great things being produced and it seems people arent so brand conscious as they used to be.

嗯: Anything else you would like to add?

JB: Just a thank you for taking the time to even ask me this stuff. It was an honor!

嗯: Thank you for your time and information!

JB: Of course!

 

 

This is a pretty great article/review too: Premier Guitar | 2011 Indy Fly-Caster in TV Yellow

 

Check out Jimmie Bruhn’s Jam TV YouTube Channel here. Here’s a video, too:

 

Here’s my creepy basement demo:

Here’s a random one that I found by Googling:

 

Posting #AllMyAxes. (Part 2)


Did you see part one? I felt like posting all my guitars online simply for something else to look at, and I thought others might enjoy.

I still plan to blog about some of the more interesting ones. Hopefully you guys enjoy the content. Thanks for the likes on social media. I don’t think anyone else started to use the #AllMyAxes hashtag. Oh well. Ha ha.

Show me some of yours in the comments, tag me on social media, or use your own hashtag!

 

The Family Ukuleles & Mandolin

The Kids' Guitars

 

Places where I have played.


Just having fun a while ago, making a map of venues where I have played. For no reason other than fun.

I may be missing some. Not sure? I have seen so many local shows, I don’t know if I ever actually played some oft-frequented venues. It’s amazing how many places I have played that are gone.

I know I am missing a bar in Kitanning, and the names of a few places. Maybe even a private show or two? If you know of some, help me out!

I have blogged about my old bands, my guitars, & guitar-o-batics. This was just a trip down memory lane.

Have you mapped shows that you have played or attended? A touring map would be impressive!

Did you attend any of these shows? Share some memories below!

The Metallica Playlist – Part II


So, did you read my last post about making a playlist of Metallica songs so Bethany will be familiar with some of the music at the show? l grabbed a few tracks from each album, popped them into a list, & mixed ’em up a bit. It still seems a tad unwieldy. It’s 47 songs, and I don’t even want to know what the run time would be. (I still need to dig out all of my CD’s & rip some of these older songs. I live in the stone age and listen to mp3’s saved to a thumb drive plugged into the car.)

Metallicollage

How would you pare it down? Could you get it to 30 songs? 10 songs? 60 minutes? What is the most essential stuff you’d need to grasp their overall sound and/or appreciate a live show?

I had Alexa playing some random Metallica this morning, and it wasn’t a bad mix. This actually really has me appreciating Death Magnetic & Hardwired To Self-Destruct more & more.

 

Metallica 101 Playlist

  1. Ecstasy of Gold” (We All Love Ennio Morricone) [Ennio Morricone]
  2. Enter Sandman” (Metallica)
  3. One (再nd Justice for All)
  4. For Whom the Bell Tolls (Ride the Lightning)
  5. Whiskey in the Jar (Garage, Inc.) [Thin Lizzy]
  6. (Anesthesia)Pulling Teeth (Kill Em All)
  7. Whiplash (Kill Em All)
  8. Last Caress (Live Shit: Binge & Purge) [Misfits]
  9. Master of Puppets” (Master of Puppets)
  10. Cyanide (Death Magnetic)
  11. The Call of Ktulu” (S&M)
  12. Nothing Else Matters” (Metallica)
  13. Seek And Destroy (Live Shit: Binge & Purge)
  14. Some Kind of Monster (St. Anger)
  15. Fade To Black” (Ride the Lightning)
  16. Overkill (Garage, Inc.) [Mot繹rhead]
  17. Hardwired (Hardwired To Self-Destruct)
  18. The Memory Remains (Through The Never)
  19. Four Horsemen (Kill Em All)
  20. Creeping Death (Live Shit: Binge & Purge)
  21. Until It Sleeps (S&M)
  22. Altas, Rise! (Hardwired To Self-Destruct)
  23. Battery” (Master of Puppets)
  24. Die, Die My Darling (Garage, Inc.) [Misfits]
  25. Frantic (St. Anger)
  26. Fuel (Re-Load)
  27. Orion” (Through the Never)
  28. Unforgiven” (Metallica)
  29. Unforgiven II (Re-Load)
  30. Unforgiven III” (Death Magnetic)
  31. Sad But True (Live Shit: Binge & Purge)
  32. I Disappear (Mission: Impossible 2 Soundtrack)
  33. All Nightmare Long (Death Magnetic)
  34. Mama Said (Load)
  35. Welcome Home (Sanitarium) (Master of Puppets)
  36. Commando (St. Anger Single) [Ramones]
  37. Now That Were Dead (Hardwired To Self-Destruct)
  38. Stone Cold Crazy” (Garage, Inc.) [Queen]
  39. Wherever I May Roam (S&M)
  40. The Day That Never Comes (Death Magnetic)
  41. Tuesdays Gone (Garage, Inc.) [Lynyrd Skynyrd]
  42. Disposable Heroes (Master of Puppets)
  43. Blackened (再nd Justice for All)
  44. St. Anger (St. Anger)
  45. Low Mans Lyric (Re-Load)
  46. Harvester of Sorrow (再nd Justice for All)
  47. One (S&M)

Would you skip songs & go to videos, live sets or clips, or documentaries?

 

 

So, I set up a living room rig. 


This morning I felt like playing the guitar. I didn’t feel like jamming in the basement by my work bench where all my stuff is set up. I didn’t bring up the Laney 2×12 or the Orange Micro Terror. I brought out the Fender Blues Jr. & a Yamaha MSR100 powered speaker so I could run my new DigiTech Trio into two different outputs.

The Trio was a birthday present from my wife. It was on backorder from Sweetwater for a while & we have been really busy so this was my first chance to try it out. I set it up like this…

Living Room Rig Setup

It started out as a pile of stuff in the corner. Then I remembered that I had an old RCA-Victor TV cabinet in the garage purchased from our house’s previous owner that I thought about turning into an amp someday. The Blues Jr. fit where the TV went, and the Yamaha PA fit underneath where the speaker grille is.

Then I had a cabinet and I pile of pedals. So, I cut up a milk crate and made a goofy pedal board with a Donner power supply & some zip ties. The “board” fits inside the cabinet with the blues Jr. too. It was a morning long project but it felt good to get it done & know I can jam a lot more easily. It may be tricky if I just want to use the Trio & some headphones.

I do have a Dirt & Ernie pedal & an A/B/Y that I use to run the Jr. & Micro Terror at the same time. Maybe a board extension will eventually be in order? How cool would it be if the doors came off & were the pedalboard?

Oh well. Enough monkeying. Time to jam.

I will eventually have to give a serious(?) evaluation of the Trio. I do already know I want a looper now. Ha ha. It was pretty intuitive & loads of right out of the box. My 4 year old told me to turn it down right away, so it had to be cool. Right?

 

Monkeying with the DigiTech Trio:

I apologize for the “living room while the wife and kids are home” volume, and the Crocs.

 

My little dude seemed to like the idea. He has all the moves down. Maybe some day he will want to play too!

Do you have a living room, bedroom, or other small setup rig? Share some in the comments! Any thoughts on any of this equipment? Any tips for the Trio? You can comment below here at the blog with WordPress, Facebook, Twitter, or a Gravatar login.

Guitars & Virtual Window Shopping 


Is there a word for the internet version of window-shopping? I certainly have enough guitars. I really dig my oddball collection. But, I’m always looking. I made a wishlist before, so I thought I’d update it. Of course, this list is subject to change by the minute, and like a rodent with shiny objects I can be easily distracted.

 

-賅-

 

Traveler Guitar TravelcasterTraveler Guitar Travelcaster – It’s no secret that I dig weird guitars. This is pretty neat. I love the idea, even if ESP had it first. Supposedly, the ESP ones were only made & sold in Japan. The Traveler Travelcasters look pretty snazzy, and Traveler makes some other really cool stuff. I bet it really would be useful in a travel capacity, & provide some fun on stage. I see these ads constantly.

BOHOBohemian Guitars Oil Can Guitar – Who doesn’t want one? It’s like a cigar box guitar cranked up to 11. They look like a ton of fun, and they’re not really all that expensive. These Boho axes are real attention grabbers. I also see these ads constantly. The reviews appear to be fanrastic.

Millennium Falcon GuitarA Millennium Falcon Guitar – There have been various builders to create this to varying degrees of success. I’d love to get my scruffy nerf-herding paws on one. I even blogged about it before (check the comments). You know I have an appreciation of weird guitars and of Star Wars, so this is a natural. Bonus if it includes lights and sounds!

Peavey T-60Peavey T-60 – These Peaveys seem like a sort of underground or unspoken holy grail, especially if you get the amp in a case. The T-30 and T-15 look cool to, but I dig humbuckers. so 60 may be the way to go. Hell, a Peavey Mantis would kick some butt too.

Gibson Reverse Flying VGibson Reverse Flying V – I mean, I already have a Dewey Decibel FlipOut, so why not continue the trend? This one will probably never happen unless I win the lottery. I like my guitars cheap, and this one is not cheap. Epiphone, how about a limited run here? The hate for it online alone drives my want for it.

Archer Flying Cheese WedgeArcher Flying Cheese Wedge– This thing is absolutely ridiculous. I love it. If I ever found a cheap one, I would pounce. I mean, CHEESE. Who doesn’t like cheese (besides the lactose intolerant)? I think it has something to do with Wisconsin sportsball. I just like cheese. A lot.

Hello Kitty Squier StratocasterHello Kitty Squier Stratocaster – This is another gem sought after by a bunch of weirdos. The quality is the stuff of legend if you can snag it for the right price. They were cheap for a bit until someone let out the secret they they’re no joke.

Dean ML Acoustic, Kramer Imperial aXAcoustic ExplorerKramer made one, Dean sort of makes one. They are so ridiculous. I may settle for a Flying V one. Ha ha. Even the little ukes may satisfy this yearning.

Esteban Midnight LegacyEsteban Midnight Legacy Electric Guitar – These were going for $75-ish online for a bit, then they jumped up. Strat pickup configuration on a Les Paul shape? All black? “E” shaped headstock? Sign me up!

Gianni Doubleneck SG/Telecaster HybridGianni SG/Tele-style doubleneck – As with Bigfoot, some people refuse to believe that these even exist. The cries of “fake” and “photoshopped” abound with this type of axe online. It is ridiculous. Really, I don’t have a double-neck. I need one, right? I do have a 12 string… so a 6/12 would be boring. I would love to get one of these and make one neck a baritone or Bass VI scale. I mean, this is cool too if we’re getting really weird.

Wylde Audio Warhammer, Dean Split Tail, Gibson ZVOne of those goofy Zakk Wylde guitars – Any of the trifecta of insanity will do. The Gibson ZV, the Dean Split Tail, and the Wylde Audio Warhammer are all sort of the same shape. I don’t know the story behind the jumps from manufacturers, and I don’t really care. They are so metal, it hurts. I play so poorly for metal, it hurts. So, it’s a natural fit of pain. Right? Right? This may have trumped my old longing for a Transparent Green Lucite BC Rich.

Xaviere 550SCE_BKXaviereRTS_550SCE_BK Dreadnaught– This is all cosmetic. I just really dig the look. Plus, I really dig Guitar Fetish. I might even sell the 12-string to get this. Maybe? Anyone heard anything about the quality? I really like the look and sort of want to jump before they’re gone. I mean, if I sell the 12-string… that opens up my double-neck options. Right?

 

-賅-

 

What’ on your list? Gimme something awesome in the comments, bonus points for sub-$300-ish. What haven’t I heard of yet? What am I forgetting? What need to I need to meet or gap do I need to fill? What is your holy grail guitar? Post some photo or links too!

 

Degenerated


What’s Johnny doin’ out on a Tuesday night?

The song “Degenerated” from the movie Airheads is one of my all-time favorites. If you’re a fan of the movie, youno-doubt know the song. And if you’re a music nerd in general, you probably know that it’s a Reagan Youth cover. I would love to know more about the song. I have collected most of the “who,” but I would love to know the “why.”

Check out the two songs and then we’ll get into why I have so many questions &what they are.

OK, here are the players involved from the information that I gathered on Wikipedia, IMDB, Discogs, & wherever else I clicked;

Here’s what I want to know;

  • Who decided to use the song? The director, the music guy, the writer, the musicians?
  • Why that song? The running joke about Chazz writing the song for his girlfriend or before he met her makes it even funnier because I wouldn’t remotely call it a love song. Did someone just really like the song? Was licensing cheap all around? Did they ask Paul Cripple for permission? What does he think of the song? Did Dave Insurgent ever get to hear it?
  • Why metal up a punk rock song? They seemed like an 80’s holdover kind of band. Was it a statement on Grunge being a punk n’ metal hybrid?
  • Why are there different chord changes? The chord progression is different, but the melody (and I use the term loosely) is the same. The cover may be tuned below standard if I remember correctly? Someone more musically versed may be able to explain the difference I just know when playing by ear on guitar they’re totally different progressions.
  • Why the lyric change? ( I assume to keep the movie rated PG-13?) Most notably a removal of the F-word and references to constipation(Lone Rangers Lyrics/Reagan Youth Lyrics). Who made the changes?
  • Who played drums? Jay, Sean, Bryan, or were there other uncredited musicians?

“The Lone Rangers? That’s original. How can you pluralize ‘Lone Ranger?'”

I’m sure I have more questions that I haven’t thought of here. Does anyone out there know the explanation?

It is 2017. I may have to reach out via Facebook , Twitter, or email to all of the players involved to see if I can get an answer. (If they even remember.)

Sadly, Dave Insurgent passed away in 1993 & Bryan Carlstrom passed away in 2013.

I just really dig both versions of the song, the movie, and that it led me to checking out more Reagan Youth. Is it weird to be a fan of a song by a fictional band? Hey, I dig “Three Small Words” too, and that was produced by Babyface.

Do you like either version of this song? Do you have a song by a fictional band that you really dig? Do you know any of the relevant information here? Let me know in the comments!

Now I’m off to look at naked pictures of Bea Arthur and eat cottage cheese out of a football helmet.