P is for Potato. 🥔


This is mainly a re-post/revision of a Facebook status.  I’m still in awe, even a few days later.

You probably read about it, saw it, or heard it in WTAE, WPXI, or KDKA.  You may have even seen it somewhere else.  This woman (in a feat worthy of “Florida Man”) walked into a Walmart to relieve herself.  The problem with that is that she did it not only in the produce section, but on some producePotatoes.  I personally like my potatoes mashed, not micturated.

I have so many thoughts about this.

The BEST part is that Walmart had to release a statement assuring that they threw out the produce and disinfected the area. I mean, silly of me to assume that would be the case.

I have seen some Walmart bathrooms, and I may have supported this choice in this instance. They also close for “cleaning” often.

She doesn’t remember doing it? How did she find out? Did she see herself on Facebook? Did someone call and tell her? There needs to be a TV show that reenacts such shenanigans.  (Sounds like she saw herself on TV.  Imagine going to get a haircut, then calling the lawyer, then going to the police.  Or maybe the lawyer prompted the haircut?)

How do you overcome “stagefright?” I like to pee alone, not in public.

I want a T-shirt with her picture in the middle of the Walmart star logo with the caption “I put the P in potato!”

We put the P in potato!

Grace Under (Bladder) Pressure

I hope she didn’t drive to or from the Walmart.

I have been drunk, but never blackout drunk.  I’m in awe.  I wonder if in 2019 she can turn this into becoming a social media celebrity?

I hope she gets whatever ind of help she needs, and I hope no one bought the pee-tatoes unknowingly.  Although, they may grow in poop… So, there is that.  I would definitely advise her to have a trusted friend or handler with her at all times while drinking.  I can’t imagine having to deal with the aftermath.

I remember posting a video on the now-defunct PittsburghBeat.com one time about this naked dude who while high on PCP after running from a stripper’s house ran across the divided highway on Banksville Road and ended up being tasered (again, while naked) by police and taken to the extremely cold ground in the snow.  Months or years later, the guy sent an email asking for it to be taken down so he could move on with life.  It mentioned but didn’t really threaten legal action.  After all, it was a news story I dunno how you  could “scrub” it.  But, I can see the whole thing not boding well if a prospective employer were to Google you before hiring.

She may be a queen on People of Walmart.

This reminded me of an R. Kelly meme, and a song:

Walmart✻ saving Potatoes from Grace Brown

The only other song I remember about pee is an AiXeLsyD one, and I can’t shamelessly self promote something that is probably less embarrassing that peeing on potatoes in Walmart, can they?

Here are potatoes from my garden this year, no one has peed on them:

In parting, I call for your comments.  Please share your favorite potato recipes (like this or this), your favorite drinking stories, or your favorite pee/Grace Brown/Walmart/Potatoes jokes.

The Three Amigators? 🏙🐊🌁


So I think someone, probably most likely the zoo, missed a huge opportunity to house and name 3 recently liberated alligators in Pittsburgh’s South Hills.

The three alligators were recently released into the wilds of the urban jungle by some wildly intelligent human(s?) on the South Side, in Beechview, and in Carrick.

I confess I haven’t even read all the stories. Who needs facts when you have Facebook comments?

I’m sure KDKA, WTAE, & WPXI glossed over the hard-hitting facts and went right for speculation and didn’t sensationalize or fearmonger at all like they do every time we get a drop of rain. I did see a link to a recap, but there was a video and ain’t nobody got time for that. Looks like the Humane Society took care of these things and got them to a Sanctuary.

These three amigos, or Amigators if you will, should have been named Alleghator, Monogagator, & Ohiodile and been given their own small replica of the point to swim around in. I mean, they could play in the fountain, sunbathe in a stadium, and even ride a mini-incline.

Yes, I know alligators and crocodiles are entirely unrelated. Shh. Don’t ruin it.

Concept Art for Three Amigators Enclosure

Concept Art for Three Amigators Enclosure

11:11:11 11/11/11


Nigel Tufnel Day

11

If we all post on various blogs & social networks on 11/11/11 at 11:11:11 about it being 11:11:11 on 11/11/11, is it like flushing all the toilets in a building at the same time in each time zone?

Thank a veteran today.  You’re reading this because they do what they do & have done what they have done.

Also, this:

“What?” you ask?  This: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=nigel+tufnel+day

Celebrity Endorsement?


Sally Wiggin ❹

Sally Wiggin ❹

None can argue with the awesomeness of local celebrity, WATE-TV‘s own Sally Wiggin.  If you do argue, I’ll fight you.  Sally is awesome, in fact… she’s so awesome, that her hair has it’s own Twitter account.  You can find Sally on Wikipedia, Twitter, & Facebook (a few times)(There’s even a page called “Sally Wiggin Out” on Facebook.)  She’s a phenomenon.

Since Andrew Stockey is on Facebook all the time (he’s on Twitter too) , I was feeling goofy & decided to try & goad him into making a donation to the Pittsburgh Food Allergy Walk by invoking the name Sally Wiggin, as she’s the “Local Honorary Media Chair”…

Not gonna let Sally Wiggin get all attention for the Food Allergy Walk, are you? Care to make a donation...?

Not gonna let Sally Wiggin get all attention...

Somehow, Sally must have interpreted this as me asking her personally for a donation, as this appeared on my wall a few days later…

I did as you asked. Can't wait to meet you and Bethany at the walk.

I did as you asked. Can't wait to meet you and Bethany at the walk.

And she did!  You can see that Sarah Wiggin has generally made a contribution to my food allergy walk donation page: http://wwwofoodallergywalk.org/aixelsyd13

(This also humorously qualifies her for a limited run “king krab orange” T-shirt from Ernie of Ernie and the Berts – planning on giving her one at the walk, wonder if she’ll wear it?)

I’m not far from getting my name in the “top fundraisers” list on the Pittsburgh walk page.  Those people are still getting donations too… so keep ’em coming!

This post is to celebrate the generosity of Sally Wiggin, and to try and get other local celebrities and organizations to step up & donate… for a chance to be awesome like Sally.  (I have also received some initial contact from Chick-fil-A, Qdoba, & Giant Eagle… though no donations as of yet.)

You can also donate to my wife, Bethany… she’s not quite as “aggressive” as I am in collecting donations.  You can listen to this while you dig out your credit card…

Ridiculous Amount of Food Allergy Crap This Week


This week blew up on Twitter as far as food allergies.  So much went by that I wanted to promote, comment on, blog about, or whatever… but I didn’t get to any of it.  Oh well.  There are others out there… writing, educating, & commenting.  So… if you’re interested & you can keep up, here’s a run-down of stuff that you need to see:

First off, the ridiculousness with food allergy protesters in Edgewater, FL:

And, then, all the rest…

  • NY PIX 11 | FOOD ALLERGY WEEKIt was Food Allergy Awareness Week for WPIX TV 11 in New York. Awesome.  There’s a plethora of incredible content available here: NY PIX 11 | Food Allergy Week – I still haven’t made my way through all of it.  Looks like they’re covering all the angles though… form safety at restaurants and schools, to personal profiles, to cooking, to businesses helping out with allergy needs, to dealing with it mentally, to research, to legislation.  I really applaud the drive & effort… and hope other news stations across the country pick up on this!
  • Allergic Girl: Adventures in Living Well with Food Allergies is out, & I finally got a copy.  Just started reading, and I hope to eventually blog a review.  Bonus: Author Sloane Miller got her own segment in the aforementioned WPIX Food Allergy Week!
  • I read this essay from Keith at the FAAN website, and was quite moved: FAAN Community | First Reaction in 14 Years.  Want to know what anaphylaxis feels like?  It’s worth reading, and shows the importance of vigilance in reading labels, education, carrying an epi pen, and staying calm.  Write to your state governor and the President with FAAN’s help, & ask them to support Food Allergy Awareness Week 2011!
  • Quiznos has a lobster sub?  Ugh.  Disgusting.  I still hate Lent.
  • The Allergy Ninja has arrived to give support to the #FoodAllergyMomArmy, and  I bet (& hope) he’s up to no good.

Am I missing something?  I feel like I’m missing something.

Oh yeah.  I need to update my links.  Have a blog that I should be linking to?  Let me know!