Tag Archives: MySpace

You ought to come see some of these shows.


I’m sure you know I’m one of the Berts in Ernie and the Berts.  I’m sure you know we play shows.  I’m sure you’d have fun at one (or two or three or four).  Come rock out with us some time…

Tue. 06/05/2012 @ Altar Bar - Real McKenzies, Goddamn Gallows, Bloody Seamen, Ernie and the Berts

✟ The Real McKenzies ✟ The Goddamn Gallows ✟ The Bloody Seamen ✟ Ernie and the Berts ✟

Tuesday June 5th, 2012 at the Altar Bar (Also, win Ernie’s Pants!)

Fri. 06/22 @ Ozzie's - Nervous Aggression, Don't Wake the Dead, Ernie and the Berts

☠ Nervous Aggression ☠ Don’t Wake the Dead ☠ Ernie and the Berts ☠

Friday June 22nd, 2012 at Ozzie’s Bar & Grill

Fri. 06/23/2012 @ The Fallout Shelter: Ernie and the Berts, Johnnie Lee Jordan, Alex Payne, Joey Molinaro

☢ Ernie and the Berts ☢ Johnnie Lee Jordan ☢ Alex Payne ☢ Joey Molinaro ☢

Saturday June 23rd, 2012 at the Fallout Shelter

Fri. 07/20/2012 @ The Fallout Shelter: OTiS, Scratch n' Sniffs, Ernie and the Berts

☢ OTiS ☢ Scratch n’ Sniffs ☢ Ernie and the Berts ☢

Friday July 20th, 2012 at the Fallout Shelter

As you can see we have a bunch of stuff coming up.  We generally try to be all kinds of fun.  We’re playing with some exciting bands & artists.  We’re playing some new venues & some old favorites.  We’re playing with bands we love & bands we’ve never met.  Each show is an adventure.  Join us!

Super old music scene rant… Unprofessionalism [2005]


I just mentioned this in a blog, and then I found it.  I think this was on my MySpace blog, but I can’t find it there.  It’s an old rant from 2005 that I emailed to myself for some reason.  I don’t know if I ever posted it anywhere?  Maybe I did then deleted it?  It’s incredibly whiny and laced with profanity.  I sound like a little crybaby.  That’s what happens when you go on the internet & rant, I guess.

Русский: Jim Dunlop - Original Crybaby (GCB-95)

Wrong kind of crybaby...

I felt like posting it since I did reference it.  It wasn’t exactly on the same topic, but it is a guy in a band whining about stupid show-related problems.  When it all comes down to it, I just have fun jamming.  None of this trivial BS outweighs that.  I can’t express that enough.  I’m glad to have a current band that rocks & is a continuance of such fun.

Maybe I made this private or didn’t post it because I named names.  None of the band names or venues exist, or are at all relevant any more, which I guess says a lot.  Maximum effort, minimal results.

-✍-

Unprofessionalism

Is that even a word? Well, now it is. Everyone’s always complaining about the Pittsburgh “scene”, and stating what the problems are or what-not… Okay… not everyone… just people involved in it who like to complain I guess. Well, I have another complaint to add to this mysterious master list that bites my ass… and I don’t know how to put a tag on it other than “Unprofessionalism”. Really, before you pick the term apart… I realize that most bands on the local level & most bands that we deal with aren’t doing this “professionally” per se… they’re not making a living at it, they’re doing it more as a hobby or fun activity. Well, good for you… I do it because I love it too. Sometimes, some people (musicians & booking people) make it hard to love.

People, unintentionally or not… can be assholes. Now, I’m a very laid back kinda guy (ask anyone). Although, I guess I get uptight at certain things… like when I can’t get straight answers… and when things that my name (or my bands’ name as an extension of that) are attached to go otherwise than according to plan.

Two ball-breakers hit for this weekend’s double header.

First one, not so big of a deal, but annoying as all hell in my eyes. We’re put on a last minute show. Okay. No biggie. No notice? Someone pulled out? Okay. All I ask is that I get the details, as I guess I’m the self-appointed show-pimper(-nazi). When I mean details… I mean time, cost, address, website and/or phone # of venue, name of venue, name(s) of band(s) playing, and said bands’ website url’s. Not particularly toilsome information to provide, right? Well, apparently this is the most difficult task to ever assign anyone who calls themselves a musician, booking agent, or club owner. No one ever knows the ☠⚡☣☢ing answer to anything. The ‘confirm the date and I’ll get back to you’ shit is stupid… they get back to you the week before hand, and expect you to have a place packed with your fans and friends. People need to know what the hell is going on before they commit to something. People (me) need to know what the hell is going on before the show… a month before… so they can advertise, flyer, talk about it, get the word out.

Why are the other bands important? Well… people are more likely to go out to a show if there’s 3 bands they like vs. just one. Which brings me back to the point where I think I was going before I got to a rant inside of a rant inside of a rant…

The early show at the Spider Lounge… we were given a list of bands that’re playing. I start promoting on last minute notice that there’s a show going on, we’re playing, & this is who else is playing… The Abbitoir Murders see said advertising… and they’re like… “Hey, we’re not on that…” Apparently, one guy is even going to be out of town, so there’s no way they could. Turns out they were asked the vague ‘wanna play a show’ question, never heard anything as far as details, and assumed it went kaput. Now, this is not their fault. It’s the fault of whoever set up the show. Who did set up the show? I dunno. I thought we had set up a central booking guy in order to keep all of the shit in line… so all details & info could go through him and he could ask the right questions… but apparently no one passes show info to him other than me. There was a reason for my madness that apparently no one else sees here. The way I see it though, I’ll play anywhere… so I go along with this, even though I have no idea what the ☠⚡☣☢ is going on. Don’t blame me if we can’t bring any people out because I can’t answer any detailed questions. One thing I hate more than other people being dumb, is looking dumb myself. I get word out on everything I know… then everything changes, and I look like an idiot that doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground.

In with this gripe goes websites… I ask for band or venue urls.., and I’m surprised at how many have none or incredibly out-dated information. It’s 2005. Everyone knows someone with the internet. There are free sites out there, like this one, that can get information about your place up & out. Message me if you want help with this. I’ll do it gladly. That way… when people are like “I don’t know”, we can go to the website to check out times, directions, schedules, lists of bands, etc… but even at that, the shit changes so often because bands are pulling out, or people are saying the so-and-so band is gonna be there when what they meant is that they were thinking about asking that band to maybe play… so what’s the f’n use I guess? Then I get the band’s “too new” to have a website. Well, if you’re too new to have a website, you’re too new to play a show. Get the word out there before you play. Start some hype. Tell people about yourself.

In with all the above is what I call the AMC/Club Angel’s Phenomenon. This includes some strange practices indeed… the AMC part is where you book three bands after telling the club you’ll take care of it… then you get there and 3 more bands have been added to the show, yet it’s set to start at the same time as previously advertised… and somehow, the bands that were added go on 1st, take way too long to set up, play for 45 min., and the bands you’ve booked & your bands get ☠⚡☣☢ed into short sets and playing after PA’s teen-driving curfew time so no one’s left to watch you anyway… not even the fans that were pissed that they came out too see you & had to leave before you went on, or face the possible wrath of a bored state trooper, or irate parent. The Club Angel’s side is where they call you and put you on a show… tell you the names of 2 other bands that’re playing… so you advertise those bands… get there, and find there’s five other bands on the show… none of which are the two you’ve been advertising.

Wow… all of that ranting and confusion from one little show?

The next show… we’ve had planned for how long? I dunno… a long time. Us, Moment of Tragedy, & the Have Nots. This show? Jason booked it so we have all the bands set, all the details set, things were confirmed, flyers were made & put up, and all is good to go. No problem, right?

Well, today… (the day before the show) We’re informed that the Have Nots are no longer a band. Okay. The Have Nots are a great band. They’ve put us on shows before. I love to watch them play. They all seem like nice guys. But, seriously… WHAT THE ☠⚡☣☢? I know, shit happens. You might not get along anymore. You might not have practiced a lot lately. All things that don’t happen overnight… so this falls under “Things that should have been brought to our attention prior to yesterday” (to paraphrase Robbie the wedding singer). And… again… this show has been planned for a while. Is there no such thing as being honor-bound to play, or finding someone to take your place? We still haven’t gotten “official” word. Were they just gonna be a no-show tomorrow had Mike not talked to Ed?

I’ve only ever backed out of a show one time… that’s when Boner & Ben quit AiXeLsyD the morning of a video shoot that we were to have at Angry Johnny’s for “Stand Up” in order to appear on Pittsburgh cable show The Venue. There was a whole lot of chaos going on that day, so it was understandable IMO. Other than that, any time shit arose… we either played w/o a band member, got someone to replace a band member & learn a set within weeks (Thanks Jake, now of the Last Hope, for helping form the Fismits and opening for the Undead when AiXeLsyD couldn’t do it!), and An-Die and I have even played acoustic sets when a drummer bailed. The Rally Ally loved that shit. Even that day we cancelled… I called around like a mother-☠⚡☣☢er trying to get someone out who knew our drum parts… and then, eventually called everyone putting the show together and told them we couldn’t make it. I’d never just bail & not pass the word on.

Is there no code of honor among musicians? No common bond? No feeling of being on the same team or striving for the same goal? Get some convictions, people.

The whole booking thing before… I could get involved in our whole deal with Shadrag’s Entertainment, but I digress… and we’ll save that story for another day.

So… in conclusion (you were following that I was making a point here, right?) maybe all the Pittsburgh scene needs is for all of us to get our shit together. We need to plan, organize, and follow through. It’s not that hard. Well, I know it’s hard for artists of any type to do anything so regimented… but if you stay regimented in this facet, maybe it will push you to be even more free on the artistic side. Who knows? Try it, you might like it. If we all got our facts straight before we answered questions, if we all advertised the same shit for the same day & time, if we all stuck to our commitments, and if we all communicated better… we’d have a hell of a lot more fun in a less stressful environment.

The night view of Pittsburgh skyline from Moun...

Yinzburgh

Related articles

Attn Bands :: Where and how do you promote shows?


So, bands… where & how do you advertise shows these days?  There is of course your own website (if you even bother to have one), social media, and good old-fashioned word-of-mouth. Do you still print physical show fliers?  Where do put them?  Do you pass out handbills?  How many friends, family members, classmates, co-workers, and casual acquaintances do you annoy with news of your shows & how often?

Is it flyers or fliers?

Is it flyers or fliers?

What social media do you use?  FacebookReverb NationTwitterMySpaceGoogle+Google CalendarAnything else?  I know there’s a bunch out there like the ancient Pure Volume (is anyone still over there?).

Then there are sites like Bandcamp, SoundCloud, & even YouTube… they help promote the band, but do they help promote shows?

Busker Bin

A gig is a gig, right?

Which ones do you use & which ones do you find effective?  I know bands helped animated gifs with glittering text kill MySpace.  At what point of posting about your band / shows / music / merchandise does it become over-saturation?

Do you hit the local papers or their websites with classified ads or event listings?  Do you post on local radio websites?

Do you post on the venue’s (and/or promoter’s) website/Facebook/Twitter/etc.?

Do you have an email list?

If you hang flyers, where do you hang them?  If you pass them out, where do you pass them out?

Here are some local sites where I’ve listed (or tried to list) our stuff…  Not sure if it’s drawing anyone out.

Where do you post?

Help me make a checklist of sorts to make sure we’re getting the word out to as many people as possible as efficiently as possible.

 

☘·☠·⚔·✪ Real McKenzies, Goddamn Gallows, The Bloody Seamen, Ernie and the Berts – Tue. Jun. 5th @ Altar Bar! ☘·☠·⚔·✪


That’s right, Ernie and the Berts are opening for Real McKenzies, Goddamn Gallows, & The Bloody Seamen on June 5th at the Altar Bar!

Hello faithful readers.  I’d like to sell mad tickets for this.  The Real McKenzies are right up my alley, these Goddamn Gallows cats look to be our kind of insane, & the Bloody Seamen remind of us our new bff‘s The Botched for some reason.

This is my personal plea to all of you to come out to this show & show us (Ernie and the Berts – the band, and the people) your support.  We’re selling the tickets for $12 a pop in advance, and we hope to sell out quick… so get a hold of me, or get a hold of Erin at ernie@ernieandtheberts.com to score your tix.

I know it’s a Tuesday, and I know it’s not a $5 bar show… but shows like this really help us get our music/name/faces out there.  Don’t you want more people to be aware of the nearly-controlled chaos that is Ernie and the Berts?

Drusky is getting warm to us, and it seems like the Altar Bar digs us… so we’d like to play more shows there more often.  The best way to do that is for us to convince your collective ass to come out to the shows, support national touring acts, local venues & entertainment companies, and local music…. and most of all to have a good time!

I mean, we like to be extra goofy, you never know what Ernie’s up to next.  The Seamen are just ridiculous and you have to see them live to believe it.  Look at the Gallow’s dudes photo & tell me they don’t like to party.  I hear that the Real McKenzies don’t wear anything under their kilts.  You have something going on a Tuesday night that can compare to that awesomeness?

Yeah, you have to get up for work the next day.  So do I.  So do most of the guys in the local bands.  You can deal with it.  Drink an extra coffee in the morning and man (or woman) up.

So, how many tickets do you want?

The Real McKenzies

The Real McKenzies

The Goddamn Gallows

The Goddamn Gallows

The Bloody Seamen

The Bloody Seamen

Ernie and the Berts

Ernie and the Berts

Here are all the details so far, I hope to make a flyer as soon as possible…

The Bands:

The Place:

The Details:

Here’s a taste of what you might get…

Feb. 4th. 2012 – Come to this show! (Check out video of all the bands here…)


AiXeLsyD13:

One week from tonight, this is where you need to be!

Originally posted on Ernie and the Berts:

Sat. Feb. 4th, 2012 - Atlat Bar (Pittsburgh, PA)

Sat. Feb. 4th, 2012 - Atlat Bar (Pittsburgh, PA)

The Bands:

The Place:

The Details:

View original 12 more words

How to pick a band name (for sadly uncreative musicians):


Band names have always been fascinating to me.  They’re rather important for many reasons.  They need to be memorable.  They represent the band on flyers, album covers, in reviews, on T-shirts (& other merch), and anywhere else they can be printed or spoken.

This is why I’m continually surprised by local & national level bands choosing some inconceivably stupid monikers.  (Especially local level bands.)

I realize that it’s a difficult thing to do.  You’re sort of stuck with it once it happens.  (Although, I’ve seen a few bands morph & rename themselves several times.)  A lot of the good ones are already taken.  Metallica is probably the best band name ever as it’s catchy, it’s not something else, and it describes the music.  When you Google Metallica, there’s no mistake as to what you’re going to get.

Some friends & I like to think up band names.  Sometimes we hear a phrase or sentence or word & think (or remark) “…that would be a cool band name.”  It’s important to brainstorm.  Throw all of your goofy ideas at a wall.  See what sticks.

With the internet age upon us, I urge you to use all of the tools at your disposal when naming your band.  Primarily, Google.  Once you have thought of a band name or two, go to Google and type it in the search bar.  Hit search.  Have the idea?

If something comes up & a band is already named that, don’t name your band that.  Seriously.  It takes 3½ seconds to Google something.  You can even use Bing or Yahoo.  If you’re signing up for a website like Reverb Nation or Band Camp or Facebook or even Twitter… and there’s another band there already named what you wanna call your band, change the name of your band rather than having a goofy unmemorable and not even remotely cool url like one of the following:

  • reverbnation.com/[bandname]rocks
  • reverbnation.com/[bandname]1
  • reverbnation.com/[bandname]music
  • reverbnation.com/[bandname]_Pgh

I don’t care if you want to be a hit recording artist, or if you have resigned to just rocking out cover tunes in bars from not until the end of time.  This has been happening since the days of the old MP3.com, MySpace and PureVolume …and it must stop.

Avoiding these things makes your band easily searchable online.  People will give up if they don’t find you right away.  We’re lazy as a species, apparently.  Or we just have short attention spans.

Your band name has to be easily remembered, and your band should be easy to find.  I was in a band called Gasoline Dion.  Google that and nothing comes up except stuff about the band.  Like the name or not (& “get” it or not), it’s easily remembered & easily searchable.  That’s what you need to shoot for.

Maybe later I’ll blog about band name categories & give some examples.

For additional reference:

Have any lists or comments to share?

Saturday December 17th – A punk rock party at the Fallout Shelter!


Reposted from ErnieAndTheBerts.com – A punk rock show to melt your face:

Insanity. Chaos. Deafening yet hooky melodies. Beer.  If these all seem like good things to you, you need to be at this show.  Add this to your Google calendar, Yahoo! Calendar, Facebook Events, or whatever you do with Google+ or AOL or MSN or Compuserve or Outlook or whatever you’re using.  Tweet about it.  Get a car full of idiots and find a non-idiot DD.

Ernie would like to remind you to drink responsibly, tip your bartender, buy some of the various bands’ merchandise, and to wash your hands before returning to work or play.

Get the flyer below tattooed on someone’s ass that you see frequently, so you don’t forget.

The Bands:

The Place:

The Details:

Ernie's twin brother

Chat.


No, I don’t want to chat.

Google’s Chat or G-talk is integrated into the mail inbox, over to the left.  It’s in about the same spot with Google+.

Yahoo‘s chat/messenger is integrated into their mail service &the only chat/add requests I ever get are super spammy.  (They’re also annoyingly getting rid of the “Updates” tab/pages which I’m sure not many will miss… but it was a way for me to read Facebook & Twitter at the same time.)

The latest Facebook outlet puts the chat right on up there.  I have my chat status set to away or always off or whatever it is… but it’s easily fat-fingered back into “hey chat with me” mode.

When I set up Ubuntu on a laptop, I setup something that acts like an instant messenger with tweets that are “@” me, and I think I can Tweet or Update Facebook from it.  It was cool for about 5 minutes.

I don’t want to chat.

We can talk back & forth via our Facebook pages, email, Twitter, or even a text message if urgency is required… but we don’t need to chat or IM each other.

I don’t have the need to instant message anyone.

If I’m at Yahoo or Google, I’m checking my email.  I’m trying to read something, I don’t need my focus pulled away.  I already have a miniscule attention span.

I’m not tryin’ to hate.  I’m just sayin’.  I mean, my wife picked me up using AIM. She was all up on me like “lol“,  “ :)“,  “send n00dz“.  OK, maybe not that last one.  But she did make plans with me to go to Ritter’s.

Instant messaging is fine, I just have no interest in it while I’m doing other things.  There are plenty of viable ways to say hello to me, or ask me questions.  I can’t think of any purposed served by instant messaging at this point in life.

Why is it forced upon me by every email carrier, social network, & rogue open-source operating system?  (OK, the last one is my own fault.)

Even some websites have built-in creepers now.  “Hello, I can see you’re looking at several different widgets on our site.  Our knowledgeable associate Peter Parker is available to help, type your question below to chat now.”

NO!  Let me browse.  (I do the same thing anytime a salesperson approaches IRL.)

Quit it.  I already have enough browser windows open at once.  I don’t need a chat going on.  I realize that I’ve reached the point of being obsolete.  I didn’t think I’d ever be the type of person that rails against change.  I don’t know if I’m railing against it here, or just not rolling with it.

So, please don’t take offense if this one time fan of Trillian doesn’t want to IM any more.  Maybe we can Skype some time.  Or not.

Emergency "Twitter was down so I wrote my...

OMG!

EatB in the Pgh CP


I found this rather amusing:

Pittsburgh City Paper - 11/02/2011

We're famous!

Ernie and the Berts – November Shows


We have some shows coming up.  You ought to attend.  We’re a good time.  I promise.

The Punk Rock Sock Hop Invades Pittsburgh! Sat.11/05/2011

The Punk Rock Sock Hop Invades Pittsburgh! Sat.11/05/2011

This is going to be one crazy show… bands, magic, a DJ spinning 50′s tunes, zombies, contests, prizes, and probably even drunk chicks.  You can get free admission and some other goodies from Pittsburgh Punk Rock with very minimal effort (if he extends the contest).  This benefits Free Ride Pittsburgh, and is a Pittsburgh City Paper Critic’s Pick for this weekend!  Click the flyer for details, links to all the other bands & entertainment!

Locksley, Ernie and the Berts, & The Mondze! 11/15/2011 @ The Smiling Moose!

Locksley, Ernie and the Berts, & The Mondze! 11/15/2011 @ The Smiling Moose!

Click the flyer for details, to see videos from all 3 bands, the link to buy tickets, and check the comments for the link to a free EP called Ghosts from Locksley with a fun Halloween theme!  Erin saw these guys in concert, and wanted to bring ‘em here to the ‘Burgh.  You’ve heard the song “The Whip”.  Lets show them some love!  Help spread the word.