Goofy Search Terms


Lots of people looking, no one commenting.

Amusing Search Terms
Search Views
dibella’s allergen info 1
Not sure if I have that here… Try their website?
dey mylan commercial 2
dey mylan epipen commercial 1
dey pharma tv ad 1
dey pharmaceuticals ad on tv 1
epi pen tv commercial 1
epipen commercial 3
epipen commercial 2012 1
epipen mylan ad 1
epipen tv ad 3
epi-pen tv ad mother cafe 1
faan and epi pen commercial 2
mylan dey epi 2
mylan dey pharmaceuticals epipen add. max’s birthday 5
mylan dey pharmasuducals epi pen add. max’s birthday 3
mylan epi pen commercial 1
mylan epipen ad 5
retracted epipen commercial 1
Boy did that ad get everyone’s panties in a bunch!
allergen cartoon 1
allergies funny 1
food allergy cartoon 2
food allergy fun 4
funny allergy cartoons 2
image for food allergy fun is this gun loaded 1
Check out Food Allergy Fun for the best food allergy cartoons!
allergy graph 2
food allergies graphs 2
food allergy graph 2
food allergy graphs 2
food allergy pie charts 2
food allergy pie charts 2
food allergy statistics graph 2
graph related to food 2
graphs and tables on food intolerance 1
graphs for food allergens 1
pie graph children food allergies 2
You like stats, don’t you?  I doubt my graph was much help.  Are you using this for a report for your schoolwork?
“rep. matt smith” and food allergy 1
emergency epi pen act 1
the emergency epipen bill 1
I’d like a consumer push, but legislation is nice too.
allergy seafood 2
are scallops a sea bug (Yes.) 1
blog allergic reaction to shellfish 1
coworkers friends and family don’t understand my shellfish allergy (Preach on! & Read this & this & this.)
2
crab allergy 1
jimmy john’s sandwiches fish allergy 1
joe’s crab shack allergy 1
no shellfish 3
pill bug allergy (They are creepy & they’re crustaceans.) 1
pizza hut shellfish allergy 1
seafood allergy warning 2
shellfish allergies and the beach 1
shellfish allergy 3
shellfish allergy can you touch penguins 1
shrimp allergy 1
shrimp sub 2
Where are you people Leave some comments!
allergen warning sign 8
allergy warning sign 2
anaphylaxis poster 2
design a present a poster that promotes anaphylaxis 3
food allergies poster 5
food allergies what you need to know posters 1
food allergy awareness poster 1
food allergy warning sign 2
free allergy posters 3
I hope whoever wanted to “promote” anaphylaxis was just typing wrong.
sonic allergen 2
sonic allergen guide 1
sonic allergen info 2
sonic allergen information 2
sonic allergy information 30
sonic allergy menu 5
sonic food allergies 3
sonic food allergy info 1
sonic menu allergens 1
sonic restaurant allergy 1
sonic restaurant allergy information 1
Is Sonic hiding something? Why are so many searching for this & landing here?
ihop peanut allergy 1
kennywood allergic stupid people 1
allergen warning labels 1
gluten free dining in pennsylvania dutch country 1
allergen warning 4
allergy awareness week 2012 1
allergy to tylenol cartoon 2
ammaria johnson and others 2
anaphylaxis stories 2
cross contamination and allergens 1
epipen priceline 2
food allergies 1
katelyn carlson epi pen 2
Is someone at Kennywood saying they’re allergic to stupid people, or complaining about “stupid” paying customers with allergies?
amish beard 2
amish crime beard cut 2
amish gangs 2
Amish on Amish crime? Way to smash those non-violence stereotypes.
band names list 2
band names that have already been used 3
how to pick a band name 5
my facebook band name already taken 1
where to promote shows 2
Congratulations!  You took the first step to not having a stupid band name, or one that already exists.  What did you eventually settle on?
i don’t want a restroom attendant 1
Me either.  They’re creepy.
elcaganer 1
pepto poop 1
poop flush handle 2
what is your poo telling you 5
what’s your poo telling you 4
armchair reader or unclee johns bathroom reader which is better 1
Uncle John’s, hands (pants?) down.  They’re better written, better quality, and more informative & entertaining in general.
devil toilet sign 1
east german bathroom sign 2
funny toilet signs 2
girls toilet signs 2
hilarious bathroom signs 1
man woman toilet sign 2
men @ ladies sign 2
restroom signs for water parks animated 1
staff toilet signs 2
toilet sign boards 1
toilet signage cartoons 2
toilet signs 9
wc men sign mean 14
weird bathroom signs 4
cool mens womens bathroom 2
crazy men and women toilet signs 1
Did you find some good ones?
don’t forget to wash your hands 3
hand washing signage 3
not for hand wash signs 1
8 step hand wash technique in dentistry 1
do not forget to wash your hands 1
employees must wash hands sign 1
employees wash your hands signs law 2
free humorous bathroom hand washing signs 1
funny hand washing 2
hand hygiene campaign announcement 5
hand washing for kids step by step 1
hand washing instructions for kids 1
hand washing pictures print 5
incorrect hygiene signs 2
mcdonalds hand washing procedures 2
picture of someone with soap on their hands under running water cartoon 2
sing the birthday song wsh hands 1
the far side wash hands 2
the sign in bathrooms showing how to wash hands 2
wash and hygiene hand 2
wash hands sign 2
wash your hands 2
wash your hands after using the restroom 2
wash your hands sign 2
wash your hands sign for kids 2
washing hands comic 1
washing hands data 4
wet your hands under warm running water. 4
you must wash your hand 1
Hand washing is serious business. Glad to see so many are interested.  Make sure your instructions are possible… and that the employees aren’t mandated to wash your hands.
bathrooms in japan 2
crazy toilet 2
crazy toilets 2
directions for clean toilet 1
toilet too small 3
I have no idea what these would have linked to…
all the batmans 2
animated batman evolution 1
batman cinema evolution 1
batman cry baby tumblr 2
batman evolution 81
batman evolution 17
batman évolution 2
batman evolution’ 1
batman evolution comics 2
batman logo evolution 5
batman logo+evolution 4
batman symbol evolution 2
batman throughout history 2
evolution batman 3
evolution of batman 34
evolution of batman symbol 2
the evolution of batman 6
the evolution of the batman symbol 3
evolution of catwoman 1
évolution de iron man 2
This could be the costumes, the movie batmen, the comics, the logo… be more specific?Batman Evolution
6 flags batman guitar 2
6 flags grand pairie batman guitar 2
bat man guitars 4
batman electric guitar 2
batman electric guitar six flags 2
batman form of guitar 2
batman guitar 17
batman guitar 5
batman guitar six flags 11
batman guitars 2
batman logo guitar 2
batman logo guitar flying v 2
batman six flags 2
china electric guitar batman 2
customized batman guitar picks 3
dc comics superman electric guitar six flags (Not as cool as the Batman one.) 1
guitar batman logo 2
ibanez with batman logo 2
nguitars won from six flags 1
show me all of the old joker guitars that are dc comic 75050 2
six flags batman guitar 12
six flags batman guitar values 2
six flags grand prairie guitarra 2
six flags guitar 7
91 of you searched for the Batman guitar in some way.  Why did only 1 of you take the time to comment?  Tell me about yours!  (Check the Facebook page out too!)  Know anything about the manufacturer or where they’re purchased?
batman film joker 15
batman film joker 12
batman joker falls from bridge 2
batman jokers 2
joker 1966 toy 1
batman 1966 film 1
batman adam west 1
batman tv style 2
detective meme 2
adam west family guy meme 1
always be batman meme 2
batman cartoon comics memes 3
batman forever meme 1
batman memes 2
batman some days 1
batman vs bane meme 2
burt ward robin meme 2
comic book meme 3
i’m batman meme 2
meme batman y robin 2
gotham rogues shirt 1
gotham rogues tshirt 2
tom hardy meme 1
batman logo yellow circle 2
batman sky symbol 1
batman weird al 4
frame batman 1
smart car batman 5
visa batman 2
Batman Rules.
batman funny nanananana me 1
batman meme nanananana me 1
batman with a microphone 1
nanananaana batman 1
nanananana me 6
Looking for this?

Batman - Mic Check

Batman – Mic Check

calvin and hobbes pittsburgh 2
calvin and hobbes 6
calvin and hobbes tattoo strip 2
calvin hobbes tattoo 3
calvin’s dad it builds character. 2
comicstrips calvin and hobbes 2
hobbes attacking calvin 5
The world needs more Calvin and Hobbes.
cheerios smell like pee 7
my pee smells like cheerios 3
my urine smells like cheerios 1
pee smells like cheerios 30
urine smells like cheerios 20
why do cheerios smell like pee 2
why do cheerios smell of wee 1
why does my pee smell like cheerios 9
why does my urine smell like cheerios 4
Apparently this is a rampant problem that no one will comment on.  Perhaps I need to explore it further?
why don’t dry cleaners clean on weekends 1
sample dry cleaner flyers 4
blatant false advertising 1
dry cleaner brookline boulevard 1
false advertising 2
sample dry cleaner flyers 4
The more I think about it, Century Cleaners can eat a bag of dicks.  I’m just sayin’.
family reunion t shirts 2
family reunion.wordpress.com 1
Why did these land here?
arby’s berry sauce 1
arby’s bronco berry sauce buy 3
arby’s bronco billy sauce 1
arby’s poppers 3
copycat recipes arby’s bronco berry 1
make my own bronco berry sauce corn free 1
what a bronco berry 1
where can i buy bronco berry sauce 6
where can i find arbys jalapeno poppers sauce 1
Bronco Jalapeño demands justice They have tried to silence me with free Bronco Berry Sauce.  I will share it with the people.
arbys contest secret words gourmazing ingredients 1
arbys customer relations atlanta 1
arbys finger 1
arby’s finger 1
arbys letter 1
can you buy arby sauce 1
free arbys t shirt 2
good mood food 1
list of arby’s sauces 1
loaded potato bites back at arbys 1
What is an Arby’s Finger?  The glove guy, or something that should be in the Urban Dictionary?  (Oh crap, it’s a news story…)
3099 ogden steakhouse 1
catering advertisement 1
deli tip jar 2
fast food sign 1
mcdonalds fryer 4
they f__k you at the drivethrough  (Literally? I think that’s illegal.  And… who does?) 2
chick-fil-ainsiders.com 1
dan cathy undercover boss 2
dunkin warning 1
hot donuts sign 2
krispy kreme downfall 1
krispy kreme logo glow 2
krispy kreme sign 8
has panera fixed the chicken noodle soup (Nope.) 1
old panera chicken noodle soup recipe 1
panera employee view pau stubs 1
where does panera get their meat (Most likely from dead animals.) 1
pizza poop (Happen to you, too?) 2
supplier of pizza hut sauce (I bet they won’t tell you!) 1
phone number for quiznos helpdesk 1
what happened to all the quiznos 5
what happened to quiznos in pennsylvania 1
I asked, they didn’t seem to find it amusing in their answer.
sheetz headquarters 2
sheetz headquarters phone number 1
sheetz shrimp sub 2
Try Sheetz.com?
taco bell certificate 3
taco bell jokes for kids 1
taco bell pot head sign 2
taco bell receipt 3
weed taco pic 3
where is there not a taco bell for 900 miles (Excellent question! But, I think it was qualified by Taco Bell test markets serving the Doritos Locos thing.) 1
Maybe Taco Bell wanted to reply to my email, but were so high they just forgot?
dispute vincent’s pizza 1
vincents of green tree affiliated with vincents pizza park? (No.) 1
I heard Vincent’s in Forest Hills just closed.
best wendy’s review ever digg 2
hilarious wendy’s review 1
wendy’s review bawlin 3
wendy’s review funny share 2
wendy’s west liberty 2
I didn’t even write it.  Well, I did for the West Liberty one.
glenn danzig chick on his lap 3
eric “chupacabra” arce 2
jerry only 2
misfits and samhain 2
misfits mars attack .mp3 2
misfits ramones 2
mythfits misfits shirt 1
mythfits shirt mythbusters

The Mythfits

The Mythfits

2
saturday night misfits 2
the london dungeon news advert 2
what is wrong with dr. chud 1
where eagles dare misfits 3
the undead punk band 5
What is wrong with Dr. Chud?
meatloaf and cheese sandwich 2
7 lbs chipped ham in crock pot 2
barbecue sauce using ketchup and cola with chipped ham 2
gif bbq 1
the famous bbq restaurants logos of the world 3
beer helmet 3
where to find yuengling barbecue sauce 1
yuengling barbecue sauce 1
drink buttermilk with 1
how to drink buttermilk 2
old fashioned buttermilk drink 1
right time to drink buttermilk 1
turners charlies buttermilk 2
when to drink buttermilk 1
To all you haters: Buttermilk rules!
chili gi distress (Pepto’s Got U Covered!) 2
boyscout handbook electric hot dog cooker 1
do you need a cdl to drive the oscar weiner mobile (I doubt it, but it’s nice that you have a dream.  Good luck!) 1
hot dogs in toaster oven 1
how do resturants cook hot dogs (Many ways, no doubt.) 1
how to steam hot dog buns at home 1
redneck hot dog poke 2
caffiene gallikers tea 2
caffeine in turners iced tea with lemon 1
tea bird 1
turner tea carton 1
turners ice tea caffeine 1
turners iced tea caffeine 2
turners tea 3
does green tea have citric acid 1
does sweet tea have citric acid 1
where can i buy gallikers milk in pittsburgh 1
Turner’s is the best.  There’s only 1 tea in Pittsburgh, dig?
pillsbury 4
pictures of totino’s pizza rolls 2
funny graph about pizza (How about a maze?) 1
is snyder of hanover and snyder’s of berlin the same company? (No.) 1
snyder’s of berlin and hanover story 1
how do u make a food graph (Very carefully.) 1
super moms chicken caesar salad 1
Now I’m hungry.
cuce kısa poy pornosu 1
ich mochte frustig translation 1
lonely day ноты для гитары 2
nah kafa 1
stéfan le dû backstory 1
лабиринты 3
كيا بنجو 2013 1
What?
fender mini mt-10 4
fender mini twin mt-10 1
mini twin reverb 5
modifying fender mini twin 2
smokey amp 4
amplifier demonation (Is “demonation” turning it into a demon, or it’s possessed by a demon?) 1
I need to finish my mini-twin mod.
bacchus serials guitar 2
who manufacturers brownsville guitars 1
c 302 cimar guitar 3
cimar electric guitars 2
cort starfire guitar 2
elger guitar serial number 2
falcon guitars 3
copystratocaster performer 2
fender ‘g ii e’ 3
fender g-iie 3
fender strato japan 3
fender stratocaster american sender 2
fender stratocaster ukulele 2
long sleeve fender shirt 1
lunar fender 1
flipout guitar 5
flipout, lit cigarrete 2
If you have a FlipOut, let me know!  Share yours. Leave comments!
hagstrom deluxe f d2f 1
guitar graph funny 1
guitar squid flow chart 2
guitar stereotypes 1
guitarist stereotypes 5
ibanez 627 2
guitar lesson 4
guitar lesson a series of master classes 7
guitar lesson master class 1
guitar lesson poster free 2
guitar lessons 5
guitar lessons a master class 3
guitar lessons a series of master classics 2
guitar lessons and masters 2
guitar lessons series master classes 2
guitar master class 1
poster guitar lessons 2
I’m the last guy you wanna learn from.
guitarras new york pro 2
new york pro guitar company 1
new york pro guitars 1
new york pro strat bridge 2
what are new york pro guitars made of 1
what kinda wood is a new york pro guitar made of 3
Do you have a New York Pro too?  Know anything about them? Leave comments!
odd guitar 3
odd guitars 1
overseas guitars 2
ugliest guitar in the world 2
record guitar 2
tom bingham 3
vinyl record 2
vinyl record guitar (Mr. Bingham is an artist.) 2
wierd guitars (Weird ones too.) 2
I like the weird ones.
loog guitars 2
orpheum guitars new york 1
prince guitar shapes 1
guitar shapes 3
guitar shelves 2
homemade multiple guitar stands 2
multiple guitar stand 4
ukulele stand 2
stereo types of guitarists 2
all guitars and ukulele (Looking for this?)

All of my guitars & the wife's ukulele

Guitar problem? What problem?

2
guitar wiring 4
schematic diagram of soldering gun 1
seymour duncan sh-6 2
stratocaster pickup 7
acoustic guitar pick guard decors 2
green custom archtop 2
guitar google 1
guitar noize 3
guitar wood recycling 2
headstock shape by brand 3
solid guitar 2
survival paint guitar 2
vote alabama’s best guitarist 1
funny math equation 1
funny maths equations 1
funny smartass comments (I’d hope there are lots here.) 2
funny waitress comic 2
little billy writes serial killers 1
mustafi donotevenreply 1
we’d like to thank bobby for coming out tonight television 1
the hard maze and the answer 3
pizza maze 9
pizza maze for kids 1
pizza mazes 2
pizza mazes for kids 2
hard maze solutions 2
yinz maze 3
a maze 2
big mazes and more 1
blow fish maze as a body 1
crazy maze 4
curvilinear maze 1
food mazes 2
fun mazes 2
hard mazes for kids to do 2
how to draw a maze 1
insane maze 1
knot maze 2
maze 20
maze “darth vader” pdf 1
maze pdf 2
maze riddle 3
mazes 15
mazes customer service 2
mazes for kids 5
sidewinder maze 1
start to finish games drawing 3
this.make maze begin end 2
Send me your solutions! world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com
8 mile jimmy jacket 3
airheads football helmet filled (…with cottage cheese.) 1
airheads prs guitar 1
baby secret of the lost legend 3
baby the secret of the lost legend 2
mokèlé-mbèmbé 11
back to the future 1.21 gigawatts 2
back to the future movie screenshots 4
back to the future movie screenshots 4
cinemark rain check 2
crocodile dundee shaving 1
detroit rock city trip 2
flight of the navigator slash 1
goonies monster 1
gremlins scenes 1
grindhouse poster 1
harry and the hendersons movie 2
x never ever marks the spot 2
funny monster squad 1
neverending story cartoon 1
neverending story rock monster 2
police academy icon 2
police academy logo 5
predator animated gif 2
predator laserdisc 3
shaun of the dead meme 2
khna and kirk space seed 1
spock’s domination (…of who/what?) 2
star trek logo hd gif 1
wrath of khan 2
joshua war games 3
phreaking 4
willow of good 3
zorro the complete first son 2
brooksfilms limited products 1
hacking movies 2
movies from my childhood 2
best rock and roll movies 4
best rock n roll films 1
best rock n roll movies 5
best rock roll movies 1
good movies about rock n roll 1
rock n roll movies 2012 1
top rock n roll movies 1
I dig me some movies.
3po music icon 3
ackbar it’s a mouse trap tee shirt 3
ackbar snackbar 2
admiral ackbar jump to lightspeed scene 1
bob fett cartoon blu 1
boba fett cartoon poster 2
boba fett riding dragon 1
boba fett star wars blu ray art 2
cartoon on star wars blu ray 1
dark lord of the 5th day 2
darth vader light saber room light 2
darth vader vs bane 2
death star cheese ball 3
ewok meme 2
family guy star wars chronological order 1
family guy star wars movies in order 1
funny anakin pictures 1
george lucas animated musical 1
han solo saying dont get your panties in a knot 1
origami ewok 2
phantom menace robot factory 1
star wars blu ray easter eggs 1
star wars cheese ball 2
star wars christmas special easter egg 2
star wars meme 2
star wars movie night 2
star wars movie order 7
star wars seat covers 2
star wars themed r2 alcoholic drinks 2
warwick davis star wars phantom menace 4
warwick davis yoda 2
where are the droids takei 3
Do I blog about Star Wars a lot?
ann beretta“+”blogspot.com” 2
“ann beretta”+”blogspot.com”+”fallen” 1
lesbian militants stereotype 1
rock concert funny 2
devil makes three 2
the devil makes three setlist pittsburgh 1
flogging molly may 10 2012 set list pittsburg pa 1
flogging molly setlist stage ae 2
Did you read my Flogging Molly / Devil Makes Three / Brothers of Brazil show review?
axl rose in concert 1
goddamn gallows nazi? (I hope not.) 2
go-go-rays “go go rays” 1
rancid boston 2012 1
the real mckenzies (Soon!) 2
best bass guitar intro song 1
best guitar intros 2
best guitar intros of all time 1
best guitar rock intro 1
best rock guitar intros 3
best rock intros of all time 5
great rock intros 1
greatest guitar intros 3
greatest guitar intros of all time 1
greatest rock intros all time 2
list top guitar intros of all time 1
rock song with sweet guitar intro 1
songs with great guitar intros 1
top 10 songs 2012 guitar intro 1
who came up with crazy train riff 1
headbangin 2
Why not tell me what you think of my list?
snuff blah zsa mc bong bing 1
snuff lee erinmez 1
spinal tap cover 1
functionless art is simply tolerated vandalism 3
functionless-art tolerated-vandalism 1
i can’t believe katrina i was looking for my hate lyrics type o negative 1
josh silver 2
peter steel 1
peter steele 4
peter steele recent 5
type o negative? 1
wat tyler f__k pump mp3 1
1-800-553-2324 1
705 256 2357 johnny cash 1
You gonna call those numbers?
lyrics clarks toyota commercial 1
the clarks toyota commercial 3
You forgot “sucks”
dethlehem circle of death 1
beechview police blotter 2
dormont police blotter april 18 1
super moon party dormont 2
ernie tattoos 1
pittsburgh post gazette and ernie and the berts 2
Were we in the paper?
hollywood theaters 1
size of hollywood theatre screen dormont 2
kdka compares giant eagle and walmart 1
kuhns banksville 2
kuhns banksville rd customer accident 2
kuhns banksville road customer dies 1
kuhns grocers union 1
kuhn’s market banksville accident 1
kuhns mcknight 3
Did someone die in an accident at Kunh’s?
“parkway center mall” 1
Is built on top of a garbage dump, & pretty much still is one.
mark madden sally wiggin 1
sally sarah wiggin pittsburgh 1
Sally Wiggin rules.
stage ae pittsburgh not allow 1
Not allow what?  Not allow who?
green man’s tunnel guy 2
the tunnel monster 3
tunnel monster 2
It exists.
senator wayne fontana (Reads his mail.) 2
pgh photos zappa 1
pittsburgh pirates logo history 2
driving horn 2
green arrow traffic 3
linkin park hybrid theory vector 1
me first and the gimme gimmes guitars 2
angus young meme 2
@shqiptar.eu 1
dr. peter ahmed 2
chicken caesar salad scam 1
salade chicken caesar mcdo 2
google giveaway team 3
google giveaway team 13th anniversary 2
lori sandra baker 5
lori sandra scam 2
Lori Sandra is still trying to scam people?
65.55.92.184 does not like recipient. meaning 1
9999 short code not working on sprint 1
bcode sms 1
code1051 short cut text how do u fix it 1
how to unblock shortcode texting on iphone 1
message failed. shortcode may have expired 1
msg 1051 1
shortcode texting for sprint cost 1
sprint code 9999 don’t work 1
sprint google sms error 1051 not working 2
sprint message 1051 4
sprint short code texting 1
sprint short codes 2
sprint unblock short code texting 1
what is wrong if free sprint 9999 doesnt work 1
when i try to text cha cha it says unable to send due to invalid short code 1
Sprint hates you (and me).
link: foodallergybuzz.com 1
briandrusky@druskyentertainment.com 4
axvault.com 2
help customerservice.kmart.com 3
help@customerservice.kmart.com 9
help@customerservice.kmart.com . 1
help@customerservice.kmart.com. 1
http://www.help@customerservice.kmart.com 1
http://www.kmartfeedback.com 3
larry 2510 @gmail.com 2
ella.jones@us.mcd.com 12
mcdonalds.customercare@us.mcd.com 3
mcnews@ch.mcd.com 2
pit.03423@us.stores.mcd.com 2
aliciak@pizzamarketplace.com 1
hlpdesk@my quiznos.com 2
http://www.helpdesk@quiznos.com 1
googlegiveawayteam.asia@shqiptar.eu 2
gomez_p@subway.com 1
davidicus 39@gmail.com 2
jerry lunar lunar@yahoo.co.id 1
wwwjohn maherpa 2
Here is the root of the problem as to why people contact me thinking I’m McDonald’s or Kmart or anyone else.  They don’t know the difference between url and an email or an address bar & a search engine apparently.
babysitter dominationkid 1
english dominatrix wanker teaser 1
japanese sex and domination 1
knickers domination 1
man woman going to bathroom 4
orgasm torture in satan`s rape clinic 2004 bluray 1
poop taco 2
porn yinz maze 2
shirtless man in a kilt 2
spanish mistress domination 1
troubled teenagers teens living in 6556 clover valley road (You are a creeper of the highest order.) 1
vomiting domination 1
young chubby boy 1
fart math 8
What the hell is wrong with you people?  How in the hell did any of these land you here?
stuffed squirrel for sale 3
stuffed squirrel pictures 3
taxidermied squirrel 1
You need to visit Hoke·E·Geez!

Stuffed Squirrel on display (& for sale!) at Hoke·E·Geez (Bedford, PA)

“Help! I’m not dead! Some redneck just stapled my nuts to this driftwood!”

babysitter monster in bathroom 2
boots a clous skin hard 1
dine and ditch 2
dingleberry 2
fart canal 2
fart in math 2
gary busey tranny 2
girl liking wheelchair ride 1
kids monster bathroom wash 1
panty dropper sticker 2
proud rider of the short bus 2
reindeer playing ukulele 2
aixelsyd13 mcdonald’s 1
waldo lunar 9
world lunar domination 2
Someone’s looking for me! Did you find me? Where did you hear of me?
“joel pavuk” (Try asking The Bloody Seamen or The Botched.) 3
catherine paddock 1
cherelle flowers 2
chris thornborrow 2
frank l. visco 1
leroy mcdowell iv 2
linda cumer pittsburgh 2
michelle crouch 1
scott kausky mcdonald 1
travis stevens 2
So, are you looking for yourselves… or is someone looking for you?
13 levels of hell 1
4 colour pen 1
c64 logo 1
cartoon vhs tumblr 1
celtic cross scottish 1
cobra hood dragon fantasy 1
covelli enterprises wiki 1
crazy scientist electric 1
django’s bloodhound 1966 1
do you call it beanie or beanie hat 1
four colour pen 1
foxtrot comic strips andy cold 2
funny battle gear 1
ghetto blaster goofy t-shirt 1
giant bbq grate 2
girl riding short bus 1
graph of excedrin 3
graph of responses 1
graphs of food in civil war 1
happy birthday toy accordion 1
happy rock radio caroline 259 playlist 1
hare krishna vs moonies 1
how to play happy birthday on toy accordion 2
i just really want to kiss you right now (What?) 2
icecreamhucklebucks (I know the Legendary Hucklebucks…) 1
if you’re going through hell keep going poster 1
i’m sorry i annoyed you with my friendship 1
incessant 6
invincible meme 3
irish celtic cross back patch 1
irish cross 2
jelly carrier 1
letter of advertisement 2
lunar 2
lunar estate (Looking to buy? I’ll sell you some…) 2
mad scientist electrical 2
mad scientist electricity 1
modal video of paltry farms 2
moose logos 1
no entry sign vector 2
panira ng mood quotes tumblr 1
pick up after your dog sign vector 3
pro bendig wii 3
randi accessoires artikel 2833 artikel 2834 1
reunion phreaker 2
rocky road lift yj 2
shalom in 5 s wabash 2
sharpie market share graphs 2
short story a dog evolved and used man to throw sticks for him 2
stocking cap from moon 1
stupid employees 2
thank you for your time and clarifying on my queries 1
the draw-well ghost 2
the people upstairs (are noisy.) 3
this is crazy meme 1
title13, u.s.code, sections 141 and 193 1
vector graphics tv commercial for a gym 2
ya hand sign 2
Unknown search terms 257

See what I mean?

Sheetz “gets it” with my aversion to deathfish. ☺


I hate Lent.  So, did you see my email to Sheetz about having Deathfish now?  I hate Lent.  They wrote back.  I still hate Lent.  I do still like Sheetz though.

Lent sucks. 

https://twitter.com/#!/AiXeLsyD13/status/170619482715340800

But Sheetz is cool:

From: Ashley Sheetz
To: Eric <me@my.emailaddress>
Sent: Friday, February 17, 2012
Subject: RE: The New Shrimp Sub?

Hi Eric,

 I’m very sorry for the delay in getting back to you. I hope you find this information helpful. Let me start off by saying, we do everything in our power to ensure a pleasant visit for all of our customers. This includes keeping strict guidelines which include, but are not limited to, designating one fryer vat only for shrimp in order to help minimize the possibility of cross-contamination. Employees handling food are instructed to change gloves and wipe down the frying area after seafood orders are fulfilled.

 If your condition is life threatening, it may be in your best interest to avoid our M•T•O® products in the event that residue from the shrimp may come in contact with those food items considered safe. Our M•T•GO!® products are pre-made, individually packaged and manufactured under strict allergen monitoring programs; therefore, they would be a better choice for someone with severe reactions to certain allergens.  All allergens in our M•T•GO!® products are identified directly on the packaging label.

 Please keep in mind that our seafood menu is a limited time offer that we make available to our customers during Lent. Shrimp and fish items will only be served in our stores until the 25th of April. I apologize again for any inconvenience.

 Sincerely,
Ashley Sheetz

At least they “get it”.  I’d love to know if employees are told why they’re to use gloves & separate fryers or they’re just told to.  Not that I doubt the company’s convictions… just that I’ve been trained on things in the past where people have obviously had no idea or understanding of what they’re doing… they just know what they were told to do.

I wrote back…

From: Eric <me@my.email.address>
To: Ashley Sheetz
Sent: Monday, February 20, 2012
Subject: Re: The New Shrimp Sub?

Hi Ashley,

No problem on the response time.  I really appreciate that you took the time to reply at all, and love the honesty & frankness with which you’ve answered my questions.  The instructions to use gloves & wipe down food prep areas are great to hear for people like me.  There are a bunch of us out here… I just happen to be one of the more vocal & inquisitive ones.  More restaurants are recognizing that food allergies are on the rise.  Peanut & wheat allergies are hitting the news more… but there are more of us out here with special dietary needs.  It’s easy to understand not being able to eat something, but the gravity of eating that thing is sometimes lost… and cross contamination seems to be the thing that’s hardest to convey.  I’m sure you can imagine it’s difficult to place your trust (& potentially your life) into someone else’s hands.

I’m glad that Sheetz has an understanding of allergens!  It’s good to hear that the procedures are in place to minimize cross-contamination.  Hopefully the gravity of the situation is passed along in training.  Do a Google image search for Anaphylactic shock some time.  It’s not a pretty sight.

I hope the meatball sliders are still available after April 25th!  Ha ha.  I haven’t tried them yet, but they look AWESOME.  Perhaps I’ll stick to the M•T•GO!® products for now.  I do really enjoy the pre-made turkey sandwiches.

I see more & more Sheetz popping up…  you guys ought to build in Bridgeville… it’s right off on Rte. 79, and you can put a hurting on the local Get·Go.

Thanks again for your time, & answers!

-Eric
.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI

Then I wrote back again…

From: Eric <me@my.email.address.>
To: Ashley Sheetz
Sent: Monday, February 20, 2012
Subject: Re: The New Shrimp Sub?

Hello Again Ashley,

Sorry for the barrage of emails…  I just had one more suggestion.  Perhaps on the signage promoting any fish/shellfish items next year during Lent (if/when they should happen to return), you could make a note of the separate fryers, and to maybe ask a manager or person in the kitchen about your allergies?  Better yet, a button on the touchpanel alerting the staff to your allergy & having it print on your order/receipt would be stellar.  It would prove you guys to be innovators when it comes to dealing with food allergies!  Acknowledging that there’s an issue goes such a long way with us food allergy folks.

Rock on!
-Eric

.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI

Hope I’m not too annoying.  Now I’m hungry for Sheetz.

English: Interior of a Super Sheetz in Altoona...

SHEETZ!

Do(ugh)nut Despot Docility


Well, Krispy Kreme wrote back.  No doubt they believe that I’m absolutely undeniably insane at this point, but they thankfully decided to humor me anyway.  Here’s what I sent them…

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Feb 15, 2012
Subject: Re: Case #1099627
To: krispykreme@casupport.com

Aloha Lyndon,

Thank you for your swift reply!  Hopefully Krispy Kreme is able to rebound to the Pittsburgh area, and stay a little longer this time.  It’s curious that you blamed the franchisees for wanting to get into other business ventures, yet I read an article on CFO.com from 2005, detailing corporate buybacks.  I’m not sure, but was that around the time when Krispy Kreme left the area?

I have used the store locator at KrispyKreme.com to determine that the Krispy Kreme closest to me is all the way down in Washington County.  This is too far away from me to take a chance on making a run hoping to get hot fresh donuts.

I’d like to resubmit my earlier message, with unanswered questions highlighted, and perhaps I’ll add some more that have cropped up after that.  I hope that you (or someone at Krispy Kreme) has the time someday to come up with some responses.

Greetings Doughnut Despots,

I’m writing to ask you what happened.  Occasionally I get an email reminding me to visit a Krispy Kreme, and I think to myself “yeah, that’s a good idea.”  Sadly, there are no Krispy Kremes around any more.  I remember the stir of excitement when you first came to the area many years ago.  I believe it was even a news story… “Pittsburgh is getting Krispy Kreme!”  The fervor for hot fresh donuts was palpable.  The neon sign beckoning me in for a visit worked on several occasions when I wasn’t even craving donuts.  I’d generally come in to buy a Boston cream donut & an iced tea or chocolate milk… all because of that glowing invitation.  I always loved the retro decor, the smell, and the ability to see the magical doughnut making process.  You quickly dispatched with local competition.  Dunkin Donuts most decidedly took a hit, and you wiped out some of the local weird places like Donut Connetcion and Mister Donut.

Then, you pulled out like an occupying force ordered home.  There’s hardly a trace of Krispy Kreme left in Southwestern Pennsylvania.  I’ve noticed a lot of area locations like Greensburg, Pleasant Hills, and Monroeville are now Chick-fil-A restaurants, and a still-empty Krispy Kreme building sits as a shell of sadness in Robinson Township.  I remember the “remodeling / be back soon” sign hung for years before someone just gave up.  I mean, I absolutely love all the full service Chick-fil-A locations, but I also like hot fresh donuts every once in a while.  You used to be in several Sheetz locations, but now I think they mostly receive their donuts from somewhere else.  Plus, they’re not exactly hot n’ fresh there.

Remaining on your email list has become simply receiving an occasional taunt for something I can’t have.  Perhaps I should unsubscribe?

Dunkin Donuts seems to be making a rebound, and I must confess that I find their Boston cream (Boston creme?) offering to be a much fuller, larger, and more satisfying confectionery treat.  But, they don’t lure me in with a hot fresh free delicious donut, and I can’t watch them being made.  (Is it doughnut, or donut?) There’s also a killer “mom n’ pop” donut shop that’s a bit of a hike for me, but worth the trip… Big Daddy’s Donuts.

The truth is… I miss you, Krispy Kreme.  Do you have plans to come back to the area with hot fresh goodness?  Are you going to make me drive all the way to Washington county to get a doughnut & take a chance on the hot light being on?  Why did all of the area locations shut down?  Were you muscled out by local donut barons?  Did too many yinzers line up for free doughnuts and not actually buy anything?  Did Sheetz want too much too soon?  Did people go on diets or realize that too many donuts are a bad thing?  Was you plan all along to wipe out local donut shops and leave the area starved of donuts because of the high geographical rate of diabetes, thus ensuring better health for the population of the Pittsburgh area?  I need (and feel that I deserve) some answers, my friends.  What happened?  Please don’t brush me off with the standard, “it’s not you, it’s us.”  I need some concrete reasons.

Thank you for your time, I hope you’re doing well.  I’m sure you’re as hot n’ fresh as always… just not for me.

Hungrily Yours,
-Waldo Lunar

Well, there it is.  And here are more that I have thought of since…

  • Why do you spell Krispy Kreme with K’s?  Why not Crispy Creme or even Crispy Cream?
  • What’s the difference between Cream and Creme?
  • Why don’t you call a Boston Cream doughnut Boston Creme?  Why is it Custard-filled?  Is the Custard just pudding?
  • Is it “donut” or “doughnut”?
  • Why spell “doughnut” in long form, yet blatantly disregard spelling in Krispy Kreme?
  • What’s your favorite doughnut?

Thank you once again for your time & assistance in satisfying my inquisitive nature.

Aloha,
-Waldo Lunar

Here’s what they sent back…

From: <krispykreme@casupport.com>
Date: Wed, Feb 15, 2012
Subject: Case #1099627
To: world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com

Dear Mr. Lunar,

Thank you for your email regarding your questions about Krispy Kreme. We appreciate the opportunity to assist you. I have provided the answers to the questions that you have asked, I hope you find this information helpful.

– Why do you spell Krispy Kreme with K’s?  Why not Crispy Creme or even Crispy Cream? Krispy Kreme is spelled with the K’s simply to be different and stand out.

   – What’s the difference between Cream and Creme? There is no difference between the two words, “cream” is the American pronunciation and “crème” is the French pronunciation.

   – Why don’t you call a Boston Cream doughnut Boston Creme?  Why is it Custard-filled?  Is the Custard just pudding? It’s just the spelling we used for that doughnut. It can be filled with chocolate frosting, creamy vanilla, or custard filling. The custard filling is the same as the Bavarian crème filled, it’s just a different name.

   – Is it “donut” or “doughnut”? Either way is fine, “donut” is just the shortened form of “doughnut”.

   – Why spell “doughnut” in long form, yet blatantly disregard spelling in Krispy Kreme? Again, you can spell “doughnut” either way you would like. We just choose to spell it the old-fashioned way.

   – What’s your favorite doughnut? My favorite is the Original Glazed doughnut.

Pertaining to the inquiry of the 2005 article that you have provided us, we have no privy to this information here at Krispy Kreme Customer experience. We apologize for any inconvenience that this may cause you.

Best regards,

Lyndon Palmer
Krispy Kreme Customer Experience
www.krispykreme.com

Insanity.  Absolute insanity.  But, they did answer all of my questions.  Well, all of the new ones anyway.  They artfully dodged the highlighted paragraph o’ questions for a second time.  Should I send a follow-up?  Maybe I will drive to Washington to get a doughnut one of these days.

English: Krispy Kreme delivery truck.

Unless I can get them to deliver...

Sheetz – New Shrimp Sub ☹


Oh how I hate Lent and the inevitable accompanying seasonal fish/shellfish/seafood specials.  Sheetz got in on the act early this year.  Please, restaurants that don’t already serve deathfish… Stop adding seabugs to your menu!

https://twitter.com/#!/AiXeLsyD13/status/169082906206158848
https://twitter.com/#!/sheetz/status/169153004728094720
https://twitter.com/#!/AiXeLsyD13/status/169154340731367425

Of course, I also had to send off an email or 20.  I sent this to quite a few Sheet-related email addresses that I had in my address book or found on the web, and I think also through their contact form.

From: Eric <me@my.email.address>
To: Feedback Sheetz Inc. ; sheetzweb @sheetz.com ;
Cc: Lisa Claar
Sent: Monday, February 13, 2012
Subject: The New Shrimp Sub?


Hello Friends,

I write to you today with a sad face: ☹

“Why,” you ask?  Yesterday I stopped a Sheetz just south of Scottdale on my way down Rte. 119 towards Uniontown, all excited to get some delicious made to order goodness, and was stopped dead in my tracks when I got to the magical touchscreen.  I saw signs advertising a new Shrimp sub.

Why, my friends?  Why?

I understand the importance of having an evolving and diverse menu.  I get that you don’t want to grow stagnant.  Sheetz has been a safe-haven for me in dining for years.  I have written to you in the past many times over different issues, and 99% of the time, it is high-praise my friends.  Years ago when in Altoona, a friend & I even stopped to have our pictures taken in front of the Sheetz HQ sign.  I speak of your genius touch-screen ordering and delicious “gas station” food to anyone who will listen.

My problem today extends from that fact that I am severely allergic to shellfish my friends.  This includes crustaceans and mollusks… things like Shrimp, crab, lobster, clams, oysters, mussels, geoduck, calamari, scallops, snails, and several other “delicious” sea-bugs and slimy things.

If the disgusting bug-like sea creatures are battered & deep-fried in the same fryer that also cooks my french fries, cheese sticks, or chicken tenders, and I happen to partake of said otherwise non-deadly foods… it sends me quite immediately into something called Anaphylactic shock.  Basically, that involves itching, redness, swelling, and the closing of airways.

Needless to say, I don’t generally like to cap off my dining experiences with Anaphylaxis.  Yes, I have an Epi-Pen, but it’s a last resort & really only buys time until an ambulance can arrive & get me to a hospital.  In order to dodge the excitement of choking while en-route to a hopefully life-saving facility, I generally stay away from any places that serve shellfish.  Sheetz has been a go-to safe place for me for many years.  Now, I have to cross you off of my list?

Cross-contamination issues are huge.  If someone assembles a shrimp sub, then makes me a turkey or meatball sub without washing their hands or changing gloves…  Hello, ambulance ride!  I’m not doubting the training & cleanliness of your employees, but I’m sure you can imagine that I can’t take placing my health & safety in someone else’s hands lightly.

Sadly, Sheetz will have to be off of my safe list for now.  May I ask you to reconsider this deathfish offering in the future?  I believe you had a seafood sub that I wrote to you about a few years ago.  Are deadly seabugs really a necessary item?  Do they sell that well?

Places that have added deathfish to their menu over the years where there was once none include, Quiznos, Taco Bell (it’s gone now), Dairy Queen (it’s gone from most of them now), Texas Roadhouse, Famous Dave’s, Buffalo Wild Wings, Bob Evans (it’s gone now), and many more that I can’t remember now.  Pretty soon I’ll only be able to eat at McDonald’s… until they introduce McLobster country-wide.  I don’t want to be the guy that only eats Big Macs and eventually has to have a wall knocked out by Maury Povich or Jerry Springer so I can exit my house.

I write to you on behalf of the shellfish-allergic out there that just want a place to eat with safe food that we know will continue to remain safe.

I beg you to take this off of your menu, and leave it off.  Please?  I walked out of Sheetz yesterday with my head hung low & after not purchasing anything at all.  I also needed gas & drinks but left in shock & had to get them elsewhere.  My wife didn’t even say anything to try and console me.  She could feel my disappointment as we walked silently to the car.  Only after I started the car & pulled out of the parking lot did I let out a string of expletives that only revealed the proverbial tip of the iceberg to my frustration.

Thank you today for your time.  I hope you take my thoughts into consideration, and are eventually able to pull the deathfish from your menu, and drain/clean/refill all of the fryers.  There are more like me out here.  Perhaps they’re less vocal & dramatic, but the shellfish-allergic do exist.  We have feelings too.  Feelings that are crushed when new seafood offerings don menus everywhere.  We slip into a depressed food-related funk when Lent rolls around with all of its horrible seafood specials and limited time offerings.  Are we to live in a social hole & prepare all of our meals at home?  Please, don’t condemn us!

I thank you for your time and apologize for my need to complain.  I hate to come off as a whiner or “poor me”, but something just had to be said.  I look forward to your thoughts on the issue, I know you value all customer input.  You have a great company, I just don’t want to die while eating at Sheetz.  It might be bad press for you guys.
Pleadingly Yours,

-Eric

.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI

And, no one wrote back.  Well, I did get this

From: <customer_focus@sheetz.com>
To: me@my.email.address
Sent: Monday, February 13, 2012
Subject: Thanks, Your message has been received

Dear Eric,

We just wanted to let you know that we received your message and notify you that it is being directed to the proper individuals for review.

At Sheetz, customer opinions are always appreciated. Our mission is to ‘provide customers with fast and friendly service, quality products in clean and convenient locations’. Your comments help to ensure you receive only the highest possible service expected from Sheetz.

If your comment or question requires special attention, you can expect to get a more specific response back in the near future.

Thank you.

But, after the Tweet above divulging the sheetzlive@sheetz.com email address, I re-sent it with this…

From: Eric <me@my.email.address>
To: “sheetzlive@sheetz.com” <sheetzlive@sheetz.com>
Sent: Monday, February 13, 2012
Subject: Re: The New Shrimp Sub?

Hello Friends,

Perhaps my email below was sent too soon!  I see via Twitter that you have separate fryers for seafood?  I’m interested to know what other safe-handling practices & training are involved?  Do employees know why there are separate friers?  Are they taught about cross-contamination?

Is the deadly sea-bug sub a limited time only deal?

I’m a blogger, one of the issues I blog about is food allergies…  Would you like me to spread the safe-handling word?

Rock on!
-Eric
.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI

…And got this as a response:

From: Ashley Sheetz
To: Eric Carroll <eric_aixelsyd@yahoo.com>
Sent: Monday, February 13, 2012
Subject: RE: The New Shrimp Sub?

Hi Eric,

 Is the email below something you had sent to this address as well? I am working on getting in touch with our Food Manager to answer all of your questions, so I will be in touch as soon as I have all the necessary information for you.

Sincerely,

Ashley Sheetz

I wrote back again, but haven’t heard anything further so far…

From: Eric <me@my.email.address>
To: Ashley Sheetz
Sent: Monday, February 13, 2012
Subject: Re: The New Shrimp Sub?

Hello Ashley,

I had sent it this morning to an older Sheetz customer-service address that I had, and submitted it online via the contact form on the website.  Thank you for your ridiculously quick reply, and your Twitter team is awesome.

Thanks!
-Eric
.seitilibasid gninrael fo nuf ekam ot ynnuf ton yllaer s’tI

SHEETZ

Dirtbag Rob & Eric AiXeLsyD outside of Sheetz Corporate Office some time in 2004

Dirtbag Rob & Eric AiXeLsyD outside of Sheetz Corporate Office some time in 2004

So, that’s where it stands until I get further replies from Sheetz.  I’m interested to see what they have to say.  A separate fryer is a great start… but it’s also important that employees understand why there’s a separate fryer, so they don’t mix items up, or only use 1 late at night or while cleaning the other.

I’m still hoping that they remove it form the menu & keep it off.  I’d sure feel a hell of a lot safer if it was nowhere in the kitchen.

Downfall from Do(ugh)nut Domination


I’ve been getting emails from Krispy Kreme reminding me to come buy & eat some doughnuts.  The only problem is that there aren’t any Krispy Kremes around where I can go buy said doughnuts.  Much like Quiznos, they seem to have parted ways with our area.  I decided to write to them and see what happened.

From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Feb 10, 2012
Subject: So, what happened?
To: JBryant@krispykreme.com; hotlight@krispykreme.com; contact@krispykreme.com; lwatson@krispykreme.com; webmaster@krispykreme.com; jmorgan@krispykreme.com; friends@krispykreme.com; krispykreme@casupport.com

Greetings Doughnut Despots,

I’m writing to ask you what happened.  Occasionally I get an email reminding me to visit a Krispy Kreme, and I think to myself “yeah, that’s a good idea.”  Sadly, there are no Krispy Kremes around any more.  I remember the stir of excitement when you first came to the area many years ago.  I believe it was even a news story… “Pittsburgh is getting Krispy Kreme!”  The fervor for hot fresh donuts was palpable.  The neon sign beckoning me in for a visit worked on several occasions when I wasn’t even craving donuts.  I’d generally come in to buy a Boston cream donut & an iced tea or chocolate milk… all because of that glowing invitation.  I always loved the retro decor, the smell, and the ability to see the magical doughnut making process.  You quickly dispatched with local competition.  Dunkin Donuts most decidedly took a hit, and you wiped out some of the local weird places like Donut Connetcion and Mister Donut.

Then, you pulled out like an occupying force ordered home.  There’s hardly a trace of Krispy Kreme left in Southwestern Pennsylvania.  I’ve noticed a lot of area locations like Greensburg, Pleasant Hills, and Monroeville are now Chick-fil-A restaurants, and a still-empty Krispy Kreme building sits as a shell of sadness in Robinson Township.  I remember the “remodeling / be back soon” sign hung for years before someone just gave up.  I mean, I absolutely love all the full service Chick-fil-A locations, but I also like hot fresh donuts every once in a while.  You used to be in several Sheetz locations, but now I think they mostly receive their donuts from somewhere else.  Plus, they’re not exactly hot n’ fresh there.

Remaining on your email list has become simply receiving an occasional taunt for something I can’t have.  Perhaps I should unsubscribe?

Dunkin Donuts seems to be making a rebound, and I must confess that I find their Boston cream (Boston creme?) offering to be a much fuller, larger, and more satisfying confectionery treat.  But, they don’t lure me in with a hot fresh free delicious donut, and I can’t watch them being made.  (Is it doughnut, or donut?)  There’s also a killer “mom n’ pop” donut shop that’s a bit of a hike for me, but worth the trip… Big Daddy’s Donuts.

The truth is… I miss you, Krispy Kreme.  Do you have plans to come back to the area with hot fresh goodness?  Are you going to make me drive all the way to Washington county to get a doughnut & take a chance on the hot light being on?  Why did all of the area locations shut down?  Were you muscled out by local donut barons?  Did too many yinzers line up for free doughnuts and not actually buy anything?  Did Sheetz want too much too soon?  Did people go on diets or realize that too many donuts are a bad thing?  Was you plan all along to wipe out local donut shops and leave the area starved of donuts because of the high geographical rate of diabetes, thus ensuring better health for the population of the Pittsburgh area?  I need (and feel that I deserve) some answers, my friends.  What happened?  Please don’t brush me off with the standard, “it’s not you, it’s us.”  I need some concrete reasons.

Thank you for your time, I hope you’re doing well.  I’m sure you’re as hot n’ fresh as always… just not for me.

Hungrily Yours,
-Waldo Lunar

I also had a Twitter exchange of sorts, but it was all DM’s on their end…

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/169099779022921729

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/169100223275208704

They said:

@krispykreme | Please send us your email address and we’ll contact you.

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/169127252334878722

They said:

@krispykreme | Thanks again for passing along your email address. You can also email us hotlight@krispykreme.com.

Then I DM’ed

@W_a_L_D | Thank you! Rock n’ roll! Looking forward to a reply.

And tweeted…

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/169135815472070656

Heh.

Eventually, I received an emailed reply…

From: <krispykreme@casupport.com>
Date: Mon, Feb 13, 2012
Subject: Case #1099627
To: world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com

Dear Mr. Lunar,

Thank you for your email regarding wanting a Krispy Kreme in the southwestern Pennsylvania area. We appreciate the opportunity to assist you. We, here at Krispy Kreme, always love to hear from our customers and it is great to hear that you enjoy our products!  We would like to take this time to thank you for taking the time to share your comments.

There are many reasons why stores close. Generally speaking, the franchisee decides to pursue other business ventures. We have shared your concerns and requests with our operations department for review.

Please be assured that we are working hard to open new stores and continue expanding throughout the United States and Canada. For your convenience, new store locations and details are also available on our website at www.KrispyKreme.com.  The site is regularly updated with information as soon as it becomes available.

Best regards,
Lyndon Palmer
Krispy Kreme Customer Experience
www.krispykreme.com

Krispy Kreme glazed donuts.

Doughnuts or Donuts?

I’m still left wondering if “Donut” is a bastardization, like “Late Nite” instead of “Late Night” or “Drive-Thru” instead of “Drive-Through.  If so, why spell doughnut correctly while blatantly (and borderline offensively) misspelling Crispy and Cream with K’s?  (I mean, add one more K in there…)  While we’re at it, is it Creme or Cream?  Are they the same, or different things?  And, isn’t the filling just pudding or is it custard? 

They declined to comment on the wiping out & eventual rebound of their spelling-handicapped competition.  Perhaps a classy move.  Dunkin’ Donuts never replied to that tweet, either.

HOT NOW

You know you want some doughnuts. Come get them. Eat the free one, then buy some more. It's hot, well... warm, and fresh... and you can see some being made. Man, you're hungry for doughnuts.

I don’t believe that Franchisees simply chose to “pursue other business ventures.”  You don’t quit if you’re making money.  You don’t all dry up if there is demand for your product and you’re selling it at a reasonable price.  I find it funny (odd funny not “ha ha” funny) that a lot of the old Krispy Kreme buildings became Chick-fil-A’s.

In fact, I’m not sure if they answered any of my questions directly.  Should I perhaps write back?

Also, tell me in the comments where you get your donuts!  Am I missing some great local shops?  Who has the best donuts?  What’s your favorite donut?  Is it “donut” or “doughnut”?  Let’s talk all things do(ugh)nuts in the comments!

Subway, Quiznos, Taco Bell, W.G. Grinder’s, & Sheetz take note…


https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/169103504059797506

https://twitter.com/#!/FirehouseSubs/status/169104530632474624

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/169104935043088385

Firehouse Subs, you’re awesome.  I’m just sayin’.

Other food places with no shellfish currently on the menu, pay attention here too.  You don’t need shellfish.

Places that have added it over the years, preventing me from going back…

Other places that don’t need to add it to the menu…

Got that?  Good.

Also, what ever happened to Roly Poly & Schlotzsky’s?  They were excellent shellfish-free places to dine.  Come back!  Also, we need McCalister’s Deli and Lion’s Choice to remain shellfish free and move to the ‘Burgh.  Maybe even Jack in the Box too.

To the rest of you, let’s stop these damn seafood lent specials.  Let the business go to Red Lobster, Joe’s Crab Shack, Long John Silver’s‘, VFD fish fry events, and Monterey Bay.  If you don’t normally do shellfish, stay away from it.  Please?  I ask of behalf of the seafood allergic and those who choose to eat kosher.

Firehouse Subs

Firehouse Subs - my new food heroes.

So that’s where they all went…


Well, Quiznos never wrote back, but a QSRweb representative did.  Apparently Quiznos is embarrassed or perhaps angered by my request.  At the very least, they’re obviously not amused.  Poor customer service, indeed.  Perhaps they picked up a flippant tone to my original email?

Oh yeah, you probably need to read this to know what I’m talking about:  ♩♫ Where have all the Quiznos gone? ♬♪

Alicia of QSRweb.com provided some insight:

From: Alicia Kelso <aliciak@networldalliance.com>
Date: Tue, Feb 7, 2012
Subject: RE: Wendy’s accelerates store reimaging, undergoes employee ‘reboot’
To: world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com

Good afternoon, Waldo.

Per your inquiry about Quiznos and its anemic presence. That is, indeed, purposeful. The company has been restructuring – teetering on Chapter 11 – for the past year, year and a half.

In the process, it named new members to the executive team and closed its underperforming shops. However, the company has embarked upon a turnaround effort – new marketing, new international markets. Don’t count it out just yet.

You may start to see Quiznos popping up again within the next couple of years.

Thanks for reaching out. Hope this helps.

Alicia Kelso

Editor

QSRweb.com & PizzaMarketplace.com

aliciak@networldalliance.com; 502-241-7545, ext. 147

NetWorld Alliance

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From: Diana Sexson [mailto:dianas@networldalliance.com]
Sent: Thursday, February 02, 2012 4:29 PM
To: aliciak@networldalliance.com
Subject: FW: Wendy’s accelerates store reimaging, undergoes employee ‘reboot’

Well, so there’s that.  Chapter 11 can’t be a good thing.  So, that’s why all those local stores closed.  How can they not make money?  People need to eat.  People like sandwiches.  Make the sandwiches well, and people will eat there.  Seems simple.

Still waiting for an official answer from Quiznos.  Perhaps they’d like to defend this position.  I have a feeling I’ll never get one.

♩♫ Where have all the Quiznos gone? ♬♪


Some people are no fun.  Quiznos pretty much refuses to write back to this:

Salutations Sandwich Sultans!

♩♫ Where have all the Quiznos gone? ♬♪  (I imagined that in my head as sung like that “Where Have all the Cowboys Gone” song from the 90’s. – Hopefully you did too!)

I live in & around Pittsburgh PA, and all the Quiznos locations seem to have dried up.  At one point we were over-saturated, then poof!  They were all gone.

What happened?  Was it too easy to open a Quiznos?  Are they deceptively hard to run for a profit?  Is it hard to find good workers?  Certainly you have a better product than Subway and there aren’t many Jimmy John’s, Jersey Mike’s, or Firehouse Subs in the area (yet).

I ask only because I keep receiving emails asking me to come eat at Quiznos… yet there aren’t any near where I live or work, thus eliminating weekday lunch or dinner visits.  This doesn’t discount weekends, but I also don’t find myself near any Quiznos locations when I’m out & about.

This brings me back to by original query; ♩♫ Where have all the Quiznos gone? ♬♪  (Did you hear it this time?)

Inquisitively,
-Waldo

Quiznos

♩♫ Where have all the Quiznos gone? ♬♪

Really, what happened?  That’s all I want to know.  They are actual legitimate (if slightly embarrassing) questions.

I’ve submitted this to their contact form, and haven’t received a reply.  I sent it to some email addresses I had for Quiznos employees, and it bounced back.

They didn’t really answer well via Twitter, as they couldn’t get my whole letter:

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/162938645433688064

https://twitter.com/#!/Quiznos/status/162940367585546240

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/164450783432155136

…and no reply to that last one.  So, I tweeted at a Quiznos that responded with a valid corporate email address…

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/164794357063487490

https://twitter.com/#!/QuiznosRSM/status/164936161679257600

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/165059805118083072

https://twitter.com/#!/QuiznosRSM/status/165117413602496512

https://twitter.com/#!/W_a_L_D/status/165164293313150976

…and I got an error message that bounced back saying the following:

Delivery to the following recipient failed permanently:

helpdesk@myquiznos.com

Technical details of permanent failure:
Google tried to deliver your message, but it was rejected by the recipient domain. We recommend contacting the other email provider for further information about the cause of this error. The error that the other server returned was: 550 550 5.7.1 <helpdesk@myquiznos.com>: Relay access denied. (state 14).

Weird.  That message (according to a quick Google search) sort of tells me I’ve been marked as spam.  I tired sending from a different email address, but got the same thing.  I may have to print & mail this one.  I wonder if even that will garner a response?

And, I liked Quiznos…

7 MILLION People Allergic to Shellfish?


So, check this out…  It’s shellfish/seafood allergy information from the Food Allergy Daily:

Shellfish Allergy Information

An estimated 2.3% of Americans – that’s nearly 7 million people – are allergic to seafood, including fish and shellfish. Shrimp, crab, and lobster cause most shellfish allergies.

Allergy to shellfish is considered lifelong; once a person develops the allergy, it is unlikely that they will lose it.

Approximately 60% of those with shellfish allergy first experienced an allergic reaction as an adult. To avoid a reaction, strict avoidance of seafood and seafood products is essential. Always read ingredient labels to identify shellfish ingredients. In addition, avoid touching shellfish, going to the fish market, and being in an area where shellfish are being cooked (the protein in the steam may present a risk).

Keep In Mind!

  • If you have seafood allergy, avoid seafood restaurants. Even if you order a non-seafood item off of the menu, it is safer to always assume that cross-contact is possible.
  • Asian restaurants often serve dishes that use fish sauce as a flavoring base. Exercise caution or avoid eating there altogether.
  • Shellfish protein can become airborne in the steam released during cooking and may be a risk. Stay away from cooking areas.
  • Many people who are allergic to shellfish are allergic to more than one kind. Talk to your doctor so that you know for sure what foods to avoid.

Frequently asked questions

Should carrageenan be avoided by a shellfish-allergic individual?

Carrageenan is not fish. Carrageenan, or “Irish moss,” is a red marine algae. This food product is used in a wide variety of foods, particularly dairy foods, as an emulsifier, stabilizer, and thickener. It appears safe for most individuals with food allergies. Carrageenan is not related to shellfish and does not need to be avoided by those with food allergies.

Should iodine be avoided by a shellfish-allergic individual?

Allergy to iodine, allergy to radiocontrast material (used in some radiographic procedures), and allergy to fish or shellfish are not related. If you have an allergy to shellfish, you do not need to worry about cross reactions with radiocontrast material or iodine

Yeah, there’s a lot there, but I can’t get past “An estimated 2.3% of Americans – that’s nearly 7 million people – are allergic to seafood, including fish and shellfish”.

DEAD from LOBSTER

DEAD from LOBSTER (AllergyMonkey.com)

<rant> Where the hell are you people?  Not to sound like a whiner… but all the Food Allergy “press” seems to go to peanuts, dairy, & wheat… and “Gluten Free” menu/options crap seems almost like the new Atkins.  All of a sudden, Celiac is Chic.  We have peanut-free baseball games and airplane flights, where are my shellfish-free beaches and cruises, or where’s my “no contact with shellfish” menu, or separate no-shellfish fryer?  Why is Lent my own personal hell every year when a favorite restaurant adds shrimp or crab-legs or a lobster sub to their menu?  It’s even more of a pain when it becomes permanent.  (I’m taking to you; Texas Roadhouse, Buffalo Wild Wings, & Quiznos.)

Celiac disease isn’t even an allergy in the traditional sense, but it’s gobbling up all the press.  It’s an autoimmune disorder, and from my understanding… makes you poop a lot if you eat wheat.  Terrible, yes.  But, I don’t get diarrhea when I eat shellfish.  I get anaphylaxis.  Diarrhea may come along with the choking & swelling though.

I wish Shellfish Free had another user or 2 out of the apparent SEVEN MILLION of us out here.

That being said, awareness needs to be raised for ALL food allergies, whether in the top 8 or not.  So, Celiac people… throw us a gluten-free bone here, will you?  When a restaurant offers a gluten-free menu, how about a “That’s cool… but you know, there are so many allergies out there like peanut, milk, egg, shellfish, corn, peppers, and all kinds of crazy stuff.  Maybe you ought to look at your cross-contamination practices in all areas & cooking surfaces with all ingredients.”  (See this:  http://www.foodallergy.org/page/restaurants-guests-with-food-allergies</rant>

"No shellfish for me!"

"No shellfish for me!"

At any rate, where are my shellfish-allergic peeps?  This is your time & place to bitch about finding a good death-free and anxiety-free meal.  Stand up and be counted!  This is a roll call & we need a list 7-million freaking people long.  Please, leave your comments below with your story, your frustrations, or even with a positive experience related to your shellfish allergy… as well as links to any support groups or allergy resources that you hold dear.

Subway | Eat Death™


I’ve recently renewed my dialog with Subway, sparked by the news of them rolling out a gluten-free menu.  Here’s how it’s going down:

From:

ERiC AiXeLsyD <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, Jan 25, 2011 at 11:16 AM
Subject: Gluten-Free Menu Options in Texas?
To: Paula Gomez <gomez_p@subway.com>, Rob Searfus <R.Searfus@sfaft.org>, Mack Bridenbaker <m.bridenbaker@sfaft.org>, Christine Sumecki <c.sumecki@sfaft.org>, Subway Customer Care Team <asksubway@subway.com>, “B. Pingarron” <b.pingarron@sfaft.org>, “M. Luby” <m.luby@sfaft.org>, “Anna Marie Seeley (Customer Care Representative)” <seeley_a@subway.com>, Kevin Kane <kane_k@subway.com>

Hello Friends at Subway,

I write to you today because we have had a dialogue going in the past about food allergies and cross-contamination that I would like to continue.  I have recently read a few articles online informing the masses that Subway plans to roll-out some gluten-free menu options in the Dallas & Tyler Texas markets soon.  If you would like to read the articles in question, here are some links:

While I would like to be able to applaud this effort, I also find it quite frustrating.

I am quite proud of Subway as an organization when I read such responsible things like “The baked goods will arrive pre-packaged and individually wrapped. Employees will be educated on how to cut the bread using a pre-wrapped knife to avoid cross contamination.”  I mean, really… this is a novel idea and a stellar effort as well as great news for Celiac afflicted potential Subway customers.  Certainly lines like “Also, to further avoid cross-contamination, that same Sandwich Artist will prepare the order from beginning to end, ensuring a 100-percent gluten-free meal” offer a level of comfort to those who must dine gluten-free.  While other restaurants have offered gluten-free menus, you seem to understand that a knife that cuts a regular bun cannot also cut the bun of a gluten-free selection.  This would, I imagine, be quite a worry for a wheat-allergic or Celiac person.  I can imagine this scenario quite well, actually.  You may remember my past missives expressing my allergy to shellfish (and more specifically to your “seafood” sub offering).

This is where my frustration sets in.  I have written to you on multiple occasions expressing the frustration for not only my shellfish allergy, but all of the “top 8”; Milk, Eggs, Peanuts, Tree Nuts, Fish, Shellfish, Soy, & Wheat.  Why have you picked this opportunity to only concentrate on the wheat?  There are others too… I know of people with tomato and pepper allergies that would be thrown into the same anaphylactic shock that I would given I were to take a bite of unknowingly deathfish-laiden lunchmeat.  While you seem to understand the importance of a gluten-free knife… what about a cheese-free, tomato-free, and shellfish-free knife?  Perhaps you have forgotten my previous letter with a few colorful illustrations of the contaminated knife issue.  I will repost here for your convenience:

Then we have the community knife.  If one were to cut someone’s seafood sub with that knife, wipe it off, then cut my sub, there are STILL allergens on that knife, enough allergens to kill me.  Do you want me to be thrown in to an Anaphylactic fit?  I doubt it.  Well, at least, I hope not.

Think about this – do you share your toothbrush with everyone in your household?  Would you with everyone in your office?  Would you share it with everyone that you pass on the way to work in the morning or with everyone who’s eating lunch with you at the same place where you’re choosing to dine?

Yes, it sounds gross, but those potential germs that you’re no doubt currently horrified of are the same as the very real allergens that will most certainly throw me into instant death.

If that didn’t do it for you, imagine I put a giant dried dog turd on the sandwich board, cut it in half, wrapped it, wiped off the knife [with a re-used dishrag type cloth], and then cut your sandwich.  By Subway’s current logic, that knife is clean and contamination free.  This is most certainly not a pretty picture to you, my friend.  Is it?

Does any of this ring a bell?

Also, I have received conflicting reports on how such issues are currently handled or have been handled in the past.  One reply states…

The Company policy directs our independent restaurant owners / operators to take all necessary precautions to prevent the possibility of cross contamination. This includes the policy of washing all utensils and containers after each use. Each restaurant is independently owned and operated and is the responsibility of the franchise owner to implement and enforce the policy.

Which seems to conflict with yet another reply…

I have gone ahead and copied our Training Department so that further lessons can be addressed with owners and their employees on proper handling.

And, the latest information according to the QSRWeb.com article is that “Sandwich Artists in those two markets will be trained on how to cut the roll with a pre-wrapped knife for one use only.”  So, have they been trained in allergies in cross-contamination already, or not?  Color me confused, my friends.

I’d feel safer if the seafood concoction wasn’t anywhere near the meat & cheese where it currently sits.  I’d also feel safer if the same knife wasn’t used to cut all of the sandwiches, and the same dishrag-type towel wasn’t used to wipe off the knife in random intervals between sandwich slicing.  I’d feel safer if all the sandwich artists, managers, and owners were trained on allergens, cross-contamination, and the seriousness of anaphylactic shock.  I’d feel safer if all stores contained a first aid kit complete with an epi pen and clear instructions for its use.

Why should the Celiac-afflicted feel safer, but the rest of us with deadly food allergies should not?  I look forward to your response, your insights, and how you plan to move forward regarding all potentially deadly allergens and how they are to be handled in your stores.  Thank you once again for your time, I hope to hear from you soon.

Inquisitively,
-ERiC AiXeLsyD

P.S. – I was wondering, when you work in an office for Subway, do you have an in-office Subway in which the employees receive (or make) their own lunch?  Or, is there a Subway nearby where you get free or discounted food?  Or, are you all too sick of Subway to eat there?

And I got this back…

From: Searfus, Rob <R.Searfus@sfaft.org>
Date: Fri, Jan 28, 2011 at 4:31 PM
Subject: RE: Gluten-Free Menu Options in Texas?
To: ERiC AiXeLsyD <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>

Hello Eric,

My apologies for not replying earlier, I was traveling and in meetings most of the week, (as well as attending to some family business).  But enough of the excuses.

Forgive me for not having more product answers, but I’m simply a field marketing representative out here on the west coast.  I have inquired with our R&D department to try and get the answers to your questions.  No replies yet, but this week has been tough for me to get a hold of anyone on the east coast due to the severe winter storms that they have been having (offices closed for at least a couple of days.)

I’ll follow up by e-mail when I get any answers for you.

Thanks, and BTW, what part of the US to you hail from?

Rob Searfus
Field Marketing Manager
Subway® Franchise World Headquarters
16337 SW Leeding Ln
Tigard, OR 97223
Cell: 503-954-5479
Toll Free: 1-800-888-4848 x 4089
Fax 503-579-6715
e-mail: searfus_r@subway.com

IMPORTANT CONTACT INFORMATION CHANGE:  PLEASE NOTE MY EMAIL ADDRESS HAS CHANGED TO searfus_r@subway.com.  Please update your address book to reflect this change.  We are undergoing a technology transition.  During this transition, you may still receive emails from the “sfaft.org” address.  This is not an error, but please enter my new subway.com email address when sending emails.

So I wrote this…

From: ERiC AiXeLsyD <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Sat, Jan 29, 2011 at 4:17 PM
Subject: Re: Gluten-Free Menu Options in Texas?
To: “Searfus, Rob” <R.Searfus@sfaft.org>

Thank you Rob,

I had actually wondered if anyone would reply.  I had an email chain going before with a Ms. Paula Gomez & Ms. Ana Seely… but they have been short replies and my main questions have gone unsanswered.

I’m in Pittsburgh Pennsylvania.  Thanks for your time, I hope to hear from your colleagues soon!

-Eric

But in the mean time, I made some pretty pictures.  I can’t decide which one I like the most.

Which one do you like best?