So, yesterday I made spaghetti with homemade meatballs. Today, I wanted a meatball sub. I was thinking I still had some good buns from New Year’s day. They were not good. I had already melted the butter. The store-brand white bread was calling to me. A sandwich? No, a club.., Something worthy of shenanigans.
Behold: The Meatball ClubLook at that toasty goodness.Open up & say “Mmm!”If you don’t cut it diagonally, you’re doing it wrong.
It seemed to be a hit on various social media platforms, so I thought I’d share the love. If you make one, please, post the photo, tag me (@AiXelsyD13 on just about everything), and let me know how it was!
The Meatballs:
I have shared my meatball ingredient secrets a quadruple of times:
I generally don’t measure, and make them different every time. This time I fried them on medium-high in a large pan on the stove & a tiny bit of EVOO.
The Sauce:
OK, gonna level with you. I am not Italian. This is going to make some people mad. I use jarred sauce. This was the cheap Aldi stuff. Usually we get that or the Prego Three Cheese. I add brown sugar & Parmesan/Romano shake cheese. Sometimes, I even add shopped garlic, onion powder, or “Italian Seasoning.” This time it was just brown sugar and cheese. I don’t measure. I toss a little in with abandon. I like the sweetness & it cuts the acid.
The Club:
Get your stuff…
¼ stick butter
Garlic powder
Onion powder
Parsley or (Italian Seasoning)
6 or so leftover meatballs.
Shredded cheese (I had Gruyere & Swiss, but I would probably go for Mozzarella or Provolone, but the stuff I had was fantastic.)
“Shake Cheese” I had the cheap Giant Eagle brand Parmesan/Romano blend.
Three pieces of white bread.
Do it…
Pre-heat the oven to 390° on the air fryer setting.
Melt the butter w/ garlic powder, onion powder, & parsley to taste in a microwave save bowl in 30 second intervals, stirring in between until it’s a liquid.
Put the bread on a baking dish, brush on the melted butter after a good stir. (I just did the top sides.)
Air fry for 2 minutes, & it gets almost crispy on top, the bottom was nice and toasted.
While you’re doing that nuke the meatballs & sauce on a microwave safe plate for 2 min. (or longer if needed.)
Pull the toast out. (I cut the meatballs in half with a spoon then scooped them and the sauce on to two of the slices of bread.)
Top the meatballs with the shredded cheese.
Put the “shake cheese” on the 3rd slice of bread.
Put it back in on air fry for for 4 or 5 minutes.
Pull it out, assemble it like a tower of gluttony, then slice it diagonally with a giant serrated bread knife for dramatic effect.
Take a photo to share & make people hungry.
That’s it. It took a little bit of time & prep, but it was worth it.
Notes:
If you cook & have your own meatball or sauce recipe, of course do that.
Use whatever kind of cheese you want, shredded, or sliced, or whatever.
I would guess you can use the oven on 375°-ish on a regular setting for a bit longer times, or a counter top air fryer.
You could also probably do all of it in the air fryer from cooking the meatballs to melting the butter if you have the appropriate vessels.
If you slice it in rectangles and not triangles, you are a psychopath.
Discussion:
If you’re out of sausage or sub buns, or hot dog buns, what are you using? Pita? Tortilla? Soft Pretzel? Dinner Rolls? Bisquick? Crescent roll dough?
Please, tell me in the comments how wrong it is to use jarred sauce or add brown sugar.
Share with me your meatball secrets.
Do you like the powdery shake cheese or the fancy stuff?
Well, the tweets from before were apparently incorrect. The La Choy teriyaki variety that I liked has been discontinued. I emailed Conagra via webform and found a bunch of names and tried to garner email addresses online, which worked on at least 2 counts. I also got some replies from various grocery stores.
From: Conagra Consumer Care consumer.care@conagra.com Date: Tue, Dec 19, 2023 at 1:03 PM Subject: LA CHOY Consumer Care Response: Case # 06631637 [ ref:!00D800cIJR.!500QU02afd0:ref ] To: [me]
Hello Eric,
Thank you so much for taking the time to reach out to us regarding the La Choy Teriyaki Sauce. There was obvious passion in your correspondence, both for the former product you preferred and for the current product that does not meet your expectations. We’d like to offer some background and what we hope is a worthy alternative.
Previously we produced both the La Choy Teriyaki Marinade and Sauce that you enjoyed, and the La Choy Teriyaki Sauce and Marinade. With two similar sauces available, earlier this year we discontinued production of the La Choy Teriyaki Marinade and Sauce. We work with grocery stores and other retail partners to optimize our product assortment. Through these conversations, we often need to make decisions about discontinuing products. These are difficult decisions, as we know a discontinued product can be a disappointment to consumers.
We appreciate your candid feedback on the current La Choy Teriyaki Sauce and Marinade. This feedback was shared with our brand team and will go to our internal culinary team as well. Every piece of consumer input is valuable to us.
Within the Conagra Brands portfolio, we also offer PF Chang’s Home Menu, and we hope their Teriyaki Sauce is one that you’ll enjoy. PF Chang’s Home Menu is inspired by the tastes and high-quality ingredients of PF Chang’s bistros. The Teriyaki Sauce is part of a collection of sauces we introduced a few years ago, and if you’re interested in trying it, we’d be happy to send you a few bottles. If this would be ok, please reply to this email with your complete mailing address, and if applicable, please include the Unit or Apt. #.
Thank you again for your loyalty to the La Choy brand and the time you spent providing us feedback. Both are appreciated.
From: Conagra Consumer Care [consumer.care@conagra.com] Sent: 12/11/2023, 1:43 PM To: [me] Subject: LA CHOY Consumer Care Response: Case # 06631637 [ ref:!00D800cIJR.!500QU02afd0:ref ]
Hello Eric,
Thank you for reaching out to Ms. Schaefer’s office to let us know you were a fan of our LA CHOY TERIYAKI MARINADE AND SAUCE.
From time to time we reformulate our product recipes, this also includes how consumer preferences change over time. Unfortunately, it’s no longer available but we’ll make sure to share your comments regarding your request to bring back the older formulation with appropriate personnel.
If you have any further questions, please don’t hesitate to contact our supervisors at 1-800-722-1344, between the hours of 9:00 A.M. and 4:00 P.M. CST, Monday through Thursday, and between the hours of 9:00 A.M. and 1:00 P.M. CST, on Fridays. Please give reference number 06631637 to the supervisor who answers your phone call. If a supervisor isn’t available, please leave a voicemail with your name and reference number. A supervisor should return your call within 48 business hours.
Thanks again for taking the time to share your feedback.
Thank you for replying. We're unable to provide the recipe as it is proprietary but appreciate your interest in our products. Thank you again for taking the time message and enjoy your week.
From: Guest Relations guest.relations@target.com Date: Mon, Dec 11, 2023 at 4:12 PM Subject: Your Inquiry to Target.com Executive Offices To: [me]
Hello Eric,
Thank you for contacting Target about your experience. I received a copy of your email from our executive offices along with a request to reach out.
Thanks for asking about this “La Choy Teriyaki Sauce and Marinade” we understand you are interested to know if we carry or plan on carrying this. I do apologize, but we do not have this item available in our assortment and at this time we do not have any additional information to share regarding future availability. To view the wide variety of other Teriyaki sauces we do carry please click here.
We appreciate you reaching out and sharing interest with this item. I’ll be sure to share your comments with our buyers.
From: Melissa (Fresh Thyme) support@freshthyme.zendesk.com Date: Sat, Dec 9, 2023 at 10:50 AM Subject: [Fresh Thyme] Re: La Choy Teriyaki Sauce & Marinade To: [me]
Your request (26880) has been updated. To add additional comments, reply to this email.
Melissa (Fresh Thyme)
Dec 9, 2023, 9:50 AM CST
Dear Eric,
Thanks for reaching out! The products available at our stores may differ by location. To find out if your local store carries (product name), you may visit our website http://www.freshthyme.com and search for any of your desired products.
I will forward this to the Store Director for the Bridgeville, PA store location for you as well.
Thank you for being a Fresh Thyme customer! Melissa Fresh Thyme Customer Care
Nothing from Giant Eagle, Walmart, or Shop’n Save.
You should try to solve the maze, & then post it & tag me on social media. I’m @AiXeLsyD on pretty much everything.
I write to you today to invite you on a journey with me. The journey is the quest for the most absolute perfect Teriyaki sauce. You may find yourself wondering if it exists. I can assure you, it does… or at least it did. Over the past few years it has been increasingly difficult to find. You’re surely wondering by now, to which magical elixir I am referring? It is confusing, but I will try to explain: The original La Choy Teriyaki Marinade & Sauce is wondrous perfection, yet the La Choy Teriyaki Stir Fry Sauce & Marinade is devastatingly abhorrent.
I know that “teriyaki” may refer to a style, much like “barbecue” can denote many kinds of sauces, but it ought to be a crime to label these two sauces with the same descriptor. “Ketchup” came to describe the sugary tomato-based condiment we all know today, even though at one point it could have referred to many different things including a sauce with fermented fish.
I have seen the words on the label move around in various orders, so I’m not 100% sure exactly what to call the sauce, or how to differentiate it by descriptor… but I can tell you that the darker sauce in the bottle with the same shape as your soy sauce is fantastic, and the other stuff in the salad-dressing style bottle with seeds floating in it is terrible.
Over the years, I have written to my local grocery store, and they said the distributor discontinued it. I had one local store that carried it, and they have replaced its spot on the shelf with a similar yet inferior brand that we would have called generic in my youth. I have reached out to Conagra on social media, and was told to use the product locator. The product locator shows that no one around here sells that sauce, and seems to indicate it is not available online.
The La Choy website that lists all of the sauces does not show the good style sauce, but only the gross style. Is this an indication that you no longer manufacture the good stuff? Google searches lead to one gallon jugs or full cases. I only need a few bottles at a time. Looking closer, it shows as “out of stock” on some sites. Are you having supply chain issues? Is it being phased out? Is it available only regionally outside of my region?
I am writing to implore you to get me some answers other than the stock “Yes, we still make it. Please use our product locator.” I would like some real concrete answers. I also plan to write to all of my local grocery chains.
Please enjoy the attached maze, to help you as you contemplate a suggested resolution to my quest. Are you able to let me know the names of any of the distributors or local/national grocery chains where I can reach out to request your product, or even independent stores? I am in Bridgeville, PA, USA… just south of Pittsburgh.
I would love email addresses, or even snail mail. I am not a fan of these constraining contact forms.
I look forward to your reply, and thank you for the many tasty dinners that I have enjoyed thanks to your delicious sauce. I won’t even ask for an apology for the terribleness of the other sauce, even though you really should apologize for it.
I thank you for your time and attention, may you have a joyous and cheerful holiday season this year!
Your Hangry Fan, -Eric aixelsyd13(at)gmail.com
Help me on my quest!
I sent that to Conagra’s contact form, well, what would fit, but was able to attach the maze. I also sent it through Facebook and Instagram messages, and tried to reach out via Twitter (again).
I used a google search to find their CEO’s name and their supposed email syntax, and sent the message to several variations of his address. None have bounced back yet, but I doubt they will all go through. I did also email their media relations and investor questions email which I found in a press release.
What’s my next move? Snail mail? Other executives? Board Members? I plan to email local food chains & maybe even smaller grocers. How do I find their distributors? Should I snail mail these out?
I feel like I have been getting the run-around on this for years:
So, @ConagraBrands… how can you (in good conscience) call both of these #Teriyaki sacue with the only tiny disction on the label being one is a marinade & one is for stir fry… while one tastes like kissing an angel & the other like licking a demon's butthole? #LaChoypic.twitter.com/NvNohQ750J
I absolutely love the flavors in Asian food, but because of my shellfish allergy, I rarely dine at those types of restaurants because of ingredients like oyster sauce or brine shrimp as seasoning and cross contamination. I even had friends that once ordered “vegetarian” egg rolls that contained crab meat. I think it was a perfect storm of a language issue and a culture issue.
I posted this photo of a dish we make often on social media, and was asked for the recipe. I figured I would share it here too! It’s more of a method maybe than an exact recipe. My wife usually makes it with chicken instead of beef and without the chick peas.
2 or 3 cuts of whatever steak looks good / is on sale.
Extra Virgin Olive Oil – Maybe sesame oil would make it more “authentic?”
Salt, pepper, spices like onion powder, garlic powder, & season all.
Made 4 cups of instant rice according to the box, instead of salt in the water I used 1 teaspoon of beef bullion, set aside.
Sear the steaks on high on a flat pan that can go into the oven – coat w/ EVOO, salt & pepper… about 2 minutes a side.
Place a pat of butter on each steak, place in oven at 400° for about 10 minutes.
Cook the chick peas in a bit of EVOO, maybe medium-high heat. You need to keep an eye on them as they can “pop.”
Add the Teriyaki sauce to the pan and let it cook, maybe take it down to medium. I keep stirring & scraping the bottom of the pan.
Get the water boiling for under a steamer basket. I usually add onion powder and garlic powder.
Take out the steaks and let them rest on a cutting board.
Steam the vegetables above the boiling water once it starts to go… I usually wait for them to turn a bright color then turn it off as I like them still to be a bit crunchy. Carrots on bottom, broccoli in the middle, peppers on top seems to make the cook the most evenly.
Cut the steaks into strips, I try to go on an angle so they’re nice & tender.
Add the steak to the chick peas & Teriyaki… don’t overcook the steak. It should still be a little pink in the middle when you add it.
Fluff the rice.
I use garlic powder, onion powder, season all, Mrs. Dash, salt, & pepper throughout on everything.
Plate the rice, veggies, beef/chickpeas/sauce and enjoy!
It all sounds much more complicated than it is. You can cook he steaks on a countertop grill or cut them into strips & cook in the pan… but I tend to overcook them that way. You could, of course, also use the marinade as an actual marinade.
You could just boil the veggies too, but I feel like that takes out all the flavor and turns them to mush. Roasting them in the oven may be delicious too, but would take a bit longer… this would be good for the chickpeas too.
I’d be interested to see what other people think if you try it out. I’d like if you shared your meals like this in the comments, so I have more stuff to try.
I am stuck on this type of La Choy Teriyaki sauce & marinade. The flavor is perfect. The “stir fry sauce” has sesame seeds in it, & I’m not a fan of the texture and hate to tempt fate with diverticulitis issues. The other ones are just OK. What’s your favorite type? Have you ever made your own?
According to Wikipedia, it seems like Teriyaki is similar to Barbecue as it seems to refer to a style of cooking as well as the sauce. Maybe I am wildly misusing the term? I just like the sauce. A lot.
It has been increasingly difficult to find. I have tweeted(𝕏eeted?) Conagra and I think they are stalling. I’m going to have to have a maze-fueled letter & email wiring campaign. I was told the sauce was discontinued by a local distributor to Giant Eagle in 2009, but have definitely found it since then. The current La Choy website doesn’t list it as a product, but the Internet Wayback Machine has it.
Most people are apparently dimwitted, and when you post “bank” or “mattress store” as a reply to the inevitable “What is being built by the old ____?” posts on local Facebook groups or Nextdoor, they have no idea you are joking.
Let’s, as a society, start providing real information. Usually, it is easy to obtain through a search of township meeting minutes or real estate development sites.
There is no need to speculate that it is Target.
There is no need to tell everyone it is a Dollar General or strip club when it is not.
There is no need to pine for Hills, Kmart, Zayre, Woolworth, Murphy’s Mart, or some other long-gone department store.
If you don’t know, keep scrolling.
If you do know, please post evidence (in the form of a link to concrete proof) to back up the claim.
Also, as an addendum…
Starbucks and Chick-fil-A do not promote unwarranted amounts of traffic. Chick-fil-A is more efficient at directing traffic than the national, state, and local government.
No one cares about township lines. In southwestern Pennsylvania, a building can reside in a township, but have a physical address with a zip code in another town. Any reasonable person will know which one you are talking about by referencing either of these locales. There is no need to point out the difference.
Did we all get that? Am I missing anything? Hit me up in the comments.
I made some ham n’ bean soup. I liked it more this time than last time. Here’ the recipe…
Every once in a while I get hungry for this. I make it slightly different every time. This time was pretty god, so I may replicate it. Or at least attempt to.
Ingredients:
2 freezer bags of leftover ham from Easter, cubed.
2 globs of Irish butter using a tablespoon.
Spanish onion, diced.
A stick of celery, chopped
Shredded carrots, chopped even smaller
1 red bell pepper, cubed
1 tsp. of minced garlic
7 cans of beans. I used the Giant Eagle brand. I got butter beans, black beans, pinto beans, navy beans, kidney beans, great northern beans, & cannellini beans. I thought about garbanzo beans and black eyed peas.
I’m impatient so I didn’t use dried beans and soak the overnight while standing on my head facing east while reciting a mantra about not farting after eating this soup or whatever you have to do to do all that properly. Ain’t nobody got time for that. I did drain & rinse them really well. I’m sure this would be fine with ham steaks but the roasted ham from Easter was delicious.
The Method:
I dumped all the beans into a colander and mixed them, then rinsed them pretty good with cold water. I set that aside on a bowl for a minute.
I globbed the butter into the stock pot, put it on a burner, and cranked that shit up to medium-high.
As the butter was melting, I added the onions, and let them sautée a bit. I added some onion powder, garlic powder, and a bit of salt here.
I added the carrots, celery, & bell peppers, then sautéed a little more.
This is where I added the rest of the spices to taste. Use whatever floats your boat. I added the minced garlic last so it didn’t burn.
I tasted this before I did anything else and did so by setting aside a spoonful to cool while I moved on to the next step. I could have eaten just this.
I dumped the canned potatoes along with the water into the mix.
I dumped the beer into the mix.
I got 8 cups of water into a giant mixing cup & added the “better than bullion” and soup base stuff. I went a bit lighter than the directions specify because I always end up making the soup too salty. I also didn’t use a measuring spoon. I used regular spoons & serving spoons. What is this, baking?
I added all the beans, and 4 more cups of water.
I added the ham last as I cubed it. I think at some point I cranked the heat down to medium.
After adding the ham, I brought it to a boil on high, then let it boil on medium-low for 20 minutes, lid off, then pulled it off to rest.
If you’re worried about the taste, take a bite way too soon, scorch your tastebuds, and it won’t matter anyway.
This was pretty tasty. I would only maybe add bacon? Manybe peas or something? What would you add? Would you switch anything out? I’m sure chicken bullion or broth would be good here too.
I like to serve this with some buttered rolls, or even a sandwich. Maybe cornbread would be good too?
So, right before new years, I went on adventure looking for mini cocktail rye breads from Pepperidge Farm. They used to make one called Jewish Rye, and Pumpernickel.
The Jewish Rye was cool because it contained ground caraway seeds instead of the standard whole caraway seeds. I have had bouts with Diverticulitis, so I try to stay hydrated & avoid tiny sharp seeds. Caraway absolutely ruins sauerkraut, but it is good in rye bread.
Pumpernickel is cool because it essentially is named for the devil’s farts… and if that’s not cool, I don’t know what is. This is also code in my household for “I am always right.” I told my wife the name origin behind it, she said there was no way, Googled it… and, like I said… I am always right.
Did they just stop making those little mini seedless cocktail rye bread things? They are increasingly hard to find every new year. Struck out at Kuhn's & Shop 'n Save, @GiantEagle has been a miss the last few years. Maybe @FreshThymeFM?
I know that the other manufacturer, S. Rosen, make cocktail-sized rye and pumpernickel bread… but the rye is not seedless. Apparently Hanky Panky means something entirely different in some parts of Ohio.
My wife likes to make this stuff for New Year’s that’s like swiss cheese, lemon-pepper, and mayo on the cocktail-sized Jewish Rye then toasted in the oven. It’s delicious. I like to make little mini open faced Reubens. The pumpernickel would be an acceptable alternative if I absolutely can’t find the seedless rye.
Because I’m weird and can’t leave anything alone, we have this…
Hey there, Eric. We're sorry to hear you're having trouble finding our Party Rye and Pumpernickel Bread. Unfortunately, we have discontinued it. We will be sure to let the team know you were looking for it. https://t.co/7lhEBw42Iu
I, of course, posted it on Twitter, Instagram, & Facebook. I tagged Pepperidge Farm & Pepperidge Farm Cares. To their credit, they did reply:
Hi there, we're sorry to hear this! Unfortunately, this variety is no longer available. We will pass along to our team that you want to see them return.
I did tag all the stores that I could in the photo on Instagram and Facebook, but none of them have taken the bait.
I had to turn it up a notch, to which they did not reply:
All of that just says:
Hello,
I was wondering if anyone had time to try and complete my maze while considering bringing back cocktail-sized Jewish Rye.
The ground caraway was awesome, because it isn’t a potential diverticulitis disaster like whole seeds are.
My wife wpuld [sic] use it to make this delicious lemon pepper cheese appetizer, and I like to make tiny Reuben sandwiches and pretend I am a reformed King King that no longer has to eat people sacrificed to me on Skull Island.
The mini pumpernickel is cool just because of the etymology. I mean? It has to be the most metal bread out there. 🤘
How can you discontinue such wonderful things?
Also, AI generated art seems to be the cool thing these days, so I tried to make this on a few different ones to go along with the blog post:
I may have to buy a gorilla suit and make some tiny Reubens with the S. Rosen bread… and convince the wife or kids to take my photo.
Or, I may have to make a maze for S. Rosen, featuring a caraway seed that must make the journey through my guys without getting stuck, causing inflammation & a possible infection. Or maybe it has to make its way through a grinder before beign added to the dough & baked?
@SRosens1909 So, do you guys make a seedless cocktail rye bread, or just the Pumpernickel (the most metal of all breads! 🤘💨)?
I know the big PF dropped the ball and you picked up the slack. Bravo!
I doubt than anyone at Pepperidge Farm or Pepperidge Farm Cares is going to complete my maze. But, if they do, you can thank me later.
As far as discussion here, which I always ask for yet rarely get in the comments, let me know what you do with mini cocktail rye or pumpernickel bread.
Also… Ler’s discuss Reubens. Russian or Thousand Island? Regular rye or marbled? Do you add anything like bacon or swap out corned beef for Pastrami? Do you ever use Havarti instead of Swiss? Grilled in a pan, or on a panini press? I should blog about Reubens. Mmm. I’m hungry.
Also, please, please, complete the maze! Send me the results, post & tag me!
The most important takeaway is that if I tell you something, I am always right. Pumpernickel.
Are you with me so far? I bet you thought I forgot about #GreenPotatoGate. Maybe you had, and wish I had. I think this may be it, as I’m never going to get a full response from Giant Eagle, and I did get some coupons! First, are you all caught up?
Had enough? Of course you haven’t. Read on, brave soldiers for spuds and titans for tubers!
As promised, I did receive some coupons from Tasteful Selections. Way to stand behind their products! There was a cool ingredient card too, so I may check that out. I do like purple potatoes.
Giant Eagle reached out with a DM on Twitter, then nothing. 🦗🦗🦗
Hmm. @GiantEagle still hasn't replied about these @SideDelights potatoes… even though Side Delights has. They cite improper handling by the big bird. All I get are crickets, no chirps, tweets, or even screeches.
That was anti-climactic. They didn’t comment on the maze or the green potatoes.
I did, however, get one super awesome response to a positive message that I sent out about some potatoes from The Little Potato Compnay that I bought at Shop ‘n Save. I reached out like this:
From: Me <me@nunya.biz> Date: Sun, Jan 1, 2023 at 10:44 PM Subject: Thank you for a great product! 🥔 To: <feedback@littlepotatoes.com>
Salutations Spud Specialists!
I just wanted to reach out to thank you for your tremendous tiny tubers, or your perfect potatoes if you will.
Saturday I picked up a bag of the Terrific Trio style spuds from Shop ‘n Save in Heidelberg, PA, …and they were all fantastic.
You may think it’s odd to be so elated with a perfect product, but lately I have been on a crusade of sorts as I feel that nearly ¼ of all my purchased potatoes are green and arguably poisonous. Albeit very slightly poisonous.
I eat a lot of potatoes. So I buy a lot of potatoes. It seems like no one is immune to the great greening that has taken place iver the last few years. Yours were absolutely delicious though.
If you would like a window to my spiral into spud shenanigans, please feel free to catch the saga as it has unfolded so far at my blog:
I’m sure that I’m up to at least 2 readers semi-regulartly that aren’t me or AI bots. Well, I think.
I draw mazes. I sent mazes to some of your competitors as a means to get their attention, and perhaps stand out among all rhe other missives.
I am sending them you you as a thank you. Please, enjoy them and pass them along to your potato people! I would love if you got a chuckle out of them and if you took the time to try them out.
I really appreciate your multiple avenues of contact, prominently displayed right on the packaging, and a super easy to navigate website. I need to poke around the recipes!
I hope the new year brings you many new opportunities, great joy, & happiness.
Auld Lang Syne
-Eric
PS – Also attached is a photo collage of breakfast home fries with those fantastic tri-color delicious beauties.
And attached this photo (along with my potato mazes):
And I got this response:
From: Feedback feedback@littlepotatoes.com Date: Tue, Jan 3, 2023 at 12:21 PM Subject: RE: Thank you for a great product! 🥔 To: Me me@nunya.biz
Hi Eric,
Thank you so much for the aMAZEing feedback! I’m glad you enjoyed your Terrific Trio home fries!
Well. The garden plot thickens. Or something. I have a few more potato-related emails. All signs point to the grocery stores being at fault, and funnily enough the grocery stores have not replied, at all.
This happened, and we got a refund from Instacart. It’s not green potatoes, but they definitely weren’t ready to just toss into the crock pot with a roast.
If you’re wondering what the hell I am talking about, you must have missed the saga as it uprooted…
Thank you for reaching out. It’s always great to meet another potato enthusiast! As you may know, while we don’t represent any one brand, Potatoes USA works on behalf of more than 2,000 potato growers and handlers across the country to promote the benefits of eating potatoes. We’re happy to provide general feedback, and the individual brands and retailers can tell you more about their practices.
As far as green potatoes go, you’re correct that the color signifies the build-up of solanine. It’s a natural reaction to the potato being exposed to too much light. If there’s slight greening, you can cut away those green portions before cooking and eating. Generally speaking, you’re unlikely to ingest enough solanine to do you any harm.
However, I know you’re a potato skin fan (and rightly so). One bit of good news on the nutrition front is that the only nutrient significantly lost when the skin is removed is fiber. (A medium (5.3 oz) potato contains 2 grams of fiber with the skin and 1 gram of fiber without the skin.) Potassium and vitamin C are found predominantly in the flesh.
Potato growers take a number of steps to reduce greening, including maintaining enough soil cover over potatoes in the field and storing harvested potatoes in facilities with minimal light.
If you aren’t already, I’d encourage you to store your fresh potatoes in a cool, dark place. If you’re finding green potatoes upon returning from the store (or after Instacart delivery), you can often return them.
Thanks again for your note. We hope you have a spud-tacular holiday season, filled with plenty of potatoes.
Thank you for your response! I really appreciate your time and the imparted potato knowledge.
In my reaching out to several potato producers, it seems that they all want to lay the blame on the distribution and storage by the grocers.
So, the “all the vitamins are in the skin” that I got from my grandma when I was a kid was just potato public relations? 🤣
No matter, I agree they are delicious.
Please, enjoy the attached mazes with your friends, family, & co-workers!
I hope you enjoy you have a pleasant holiday season and a happy new year, and a great going season next year. I know I am looking forward to planting some potatoes myself.
I may leave out some potato candy for Santa, if I don’t eat it all!
Tuber-ular Tidings to you & yours!
-Eric
I sent the mazes again, like an idiot. Ha ha. I forgot I had sent them previously. No reply or acknowledgement this time.
This came as response from Tasteful Selections, which are the ones pictured above:
Hi Eric,
Thank you so much for contacting us. I am terribly sorry for the poor experience you had with our product. I can assure you that the quality you saw is not our standard, and for this I apologize.
We strive to ensure that every package of potatoes that leave our farm is handled with the utmost care in order to deliver a quality product to our consumers. Unfortunately, sometimes temperature changes and changes in light make potatoes break down or decay faster than they normally would.
The greening you’re experiencing occurs when potatoes have been exposed to too much light, either natural or artificial, that gives the potatoes a sort of “sunburn.” While greening is a result of light exposure, the visible greening can be delayed. Potatoes exposed to light may be packaged and continue to green beyond our last inspection point. We make every effort to avoid this, however, in your case we were not successful. You can cut the green out of the potatoes and use the rest (although that’s a bit tougher with small potatoes), but eating the green portion of the potato can give a very bitter flavor.
I am sincerely sorry for the inconvenience this has caused you. We stand by our products and you should not have had to have an experience like this. I would like to make it up to you by offering you a product voucher to hopefully help compensate you for your troubles.
If I may please have your mailing address, I would be happy to send you a product voucher straight away. Again, my personal apologies for the frustration this has caused you.
Thank you for your response! I have been exasperated lately with the amount of green or sprouting potatoes from the grocery store. It is a consistent issue across brands and stores, and whether we use a service like I Instacart or pick a bag ourselves.
I understand, from your reply among others, that the issue is most likely occurring after it leaves the potato farm.
Can retailers like Aldi, Giant Eagle, or Target be better educated about potato shipping and storage?
Instacart already refunded us for the purchase of the recently sprouting spuds as that was clearly a shopper error.
If it was spring, I would just plant them! You have a delicious variety of golden potatoes, perfect for home-fries!
Sometimes, the green potatoes don’t reveal themselves until you crack open that bag about to prepare a meal.
I would just like some sort of solution going forward. What can the potato industry do to hold grocers accountable?
If I wanted the gastrointestinal distress and discomfort associated with eating green potatoes, I would just dine at Taco Bell or Pizza Hut. Right?
My mailing address is…
Eric AiXeLsyD
#### Nunya St.
Bidness, PA #####-####
…but again I’m not really looking for free potatoes, I just want to get what I pay for.
I appreciate you reaching out, and pride in the quality of your product. Please find my gift of the attached potato mazes, and share them with your co-workers and friends if so inclined.
Have a very starchy Christmas and a tuber new year!
-Eric
And I got a reply:
Hi Eric,
Thanks so much for getting back to me. I definitely understand your concerns. Our sales & business development team are already working with Produce Managers and providing resources for storing and caring for potatoes. We’ll continue to do our part, however, it ends up being the responsiblity of Produce Managers to not only train their staff, but also make sure they are following through with the potato best practices.
I have a few coupons headed your way.
Sincerely, Jenny
I like free potatoes. I will be on the lookout for potato vouchers!
Now, I have reached several road-blocks with getting a message to Aldi. They apparently do not like to give out email addresses.
I dug up some email formats & corporate names on teh Google mosheen and sent this, also to no avail (so far):
Greetings My Frugal Friends,
I hope you are gearing up for a pleasant, festive, and relaxing holiday season! I appreciate your role in bringing food & other goodies to our homes.
I write to you today with some tuber related shenanigans I have noticed over the last few years. I have submitted a missive to your contact form at the Aldi website to no avail. I have been checking my junk/spam folder too.
I also tried reaching out via Facebook and Twitter… only to be told that your social media teams are unfathomably unable to forward messages to your customer service team or provide an email address. I had to do some Googling, and I pray to a higher power that this reaches a live intelligent and empathetic human being.
I love potatoes. At rhe risk of sounding like Forrest Gump’s friend Bubba droning on about shrimp…
I love potatoes. I like home fries, hash browns, mashed potatoes, baked potatoes, cheesy potatoes, hassleback potatoes, scalloped potatoes, potato candy, potato soup, lyinnaise potatoes, potato filling, tater tots, potato salad (hot or cold styles), shepherd’s pie, and sometimes even potato pancakes. Twice baked potatoes are a fantastic treat too. I hear potato vodka is good too, but I am not much of a drinker. Perhaps a potato beer would be more my speed if such a thing exists?
Nearly every bag of potatoes that I have purchased from your and/or your esteemed competitors over the last few years has had an alarmingly large amount of green solanine-filled potatoes. Glycoalkaloids are not our friends! On the mild end, eating green potatoes would be like chasing a Taco Bell meal with a laxative.
The straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back was one night at dinner when ready to bake 8 potatoes as a side to chili… 2 of the potatoes were totally green on the outside. They had been delivered by Instacart, but the green potatoes were not evident upon eying the outside of the bag.
That’s ¼ of rhe potatoes unusable for their intended purpose. Yes, I could have peeled away the green, but who wants a baked potato with no skin? That’s just craziness. Do I get ¼ of my money back?
I have written to and received replies from quite a few potato farms, and they all seem to point the finger at the end retailer… which in some cases is Aldi. They cite importer handling and storage… specifically exposure to light and longer than optimal time frames.
Perhaps the powers that be within your fine organization can put their heads together, asses your handling of these tiny starcchy underground gifts from heaven, and come up with ways to prevent waste? It may need to be a highly coordinated effort with logistics, distribution, shipping, and warehousing.
As an effort to aid exercise in meditation and clearing your thoughts, I have attached some potato themed mazes. Mazes and labyrinths have a history of assisting people to achieve a zen like state. Perhaps this will provide the needed clarity to prevent ultra violet potato decimation.
You have a fantastic business and I appreciate your effort to bring quality goods to the more budget-concious among us.
If requested, I can even forward my original (perhaps lost?) message.
Thank you for your time, I look forward to your thoughts on the matter!
Let’s root for a starchy Christmas and a tuber new year! -Eric
So, maybe that will get something. Maybe not. Giant Eagle hasn’t bothered to reply either.
Hmm. @GiantEagle still hasn't replied about these @SideDelights potatoes… even though Side Delights has. They cite improper handling by the big bird. All I get are crickets, no chirps, tweets, or even screeches.
@tastefulselect we got these from @aldiusa via @instacart yesterday. Instacart has refunded, but what gives with the ongoing potato issues? I have had so many green ones this past year or so. Are stores shipping/storing improperly?
Yeah, tried that. Got a phone number. Not interested in calling. I would like to send an email, but no one will provide an email address, and apparently your social media team can't just forward a DM to the customer service department. 🤷♂️🤦♂️
The starchy spud saga continues. This time I got an email from Sun-Glo who packs potatoes for Side Delights. Side delights was the brand I caught at Giant Eagle in Bridgeville that was a bag of entirely green potatoes. I probably reached out to this company twice, or maybe three times. I did not purchase that bag, and I have not had a concrete reply from Giant Eagle or Aldi USA yet. The potato farmers seem to place all the blame at the feet of the grocer.
Good afternoon,
I appreciate your email about green potatoes.
The one thing I do want to stress to you is this…..we have USDA and internal inspectors in our warehouse at all times. If the potatoes were green in a bag, they would not pass our inspections and would be not pass. When the potatoes leave our plant, they have passed a USDA inspection.
The one thing we can’t control is how fast or slow the retailers turn their inventory. Potatoes are going to turn green under artificial lights, there is nothing we can do to control this.
There is a website that you might find helpful with a lot of ‘potato knowledge” that the Idaho Potato Commission answers most questions you might have about potatoes. Idahopotato.com
And, I feel like I am ratcheting up the ridiculous with each reply.
Hello Jill,
Thank you for the reply! It is interesting to learn that Sun-Glo and Side Delights potatoes are one in the same!
I am sure you have strict quality control standards, that’s why it is so surprising to see so many green potatoes out in the wild.
I did see but did not purchase a nearly entirely green bag of Side Delights potatoes this Sunday at Giant Eagle in Bridgeville PA.
Monday at the South Fayette PA Giant Eagle, I noticed a fine looking bag of potatoes with the Sun-Glo label.
I have been reaching out to as many potato farmers as I can. The issue seems to go back a few years, and I confess I have not payed much attention to brand. We typically shop at Aldi and Gaint Eagle, but sometimes Shop ‘n Save, Target, Walmart, or even BJ’s Wholesale.
What has been brought to light (pun intended) is that Giant Eagle and Aldi must be improperly shipping, storing, or handling potatoes across the board.
The common denominator seems to be too much artificial light?
Maybe they need to start selling potatoes in rooms with red lights like darkroom back in the 1900’s when people had to develop film.
I have reached out to Aldi and Gaint Eagle to no avail (so far). They are not as quick as you at returning inquiries.
I will most definitely have to do some more research on the Idaho Potato website.
I do grow some of my own in the summer, but I am hardly a titan of tubers, or even a sultan of spuds… perhaps a prefect of potatoes? I could grow some more if I learn to store them properly myself.
I should blog more potato recipes. I cook a lot of potatoes.
Please, find the attached mazes for your enjoyment, and share them with your co-workers. I will also attach the photos of the bag I saw Sunday at Giant Eagle.
Perhaps my mazes can be used in potato safety & storage education going forward?
I appreciate your time, your concern, your knowledge, and your zeal for getting directly to the point. Honestly, and probably obviously, that is something I need to work on.
This makes me think of the books Idiot Letters and The Complete Idiot Letters by Paul Rosa, which probably started all of this with me. I used to also write letters via snail mail before email became a thing. Somewhat less inspiring but still awesome were Ted Nacny’s Letters from a Nut and the Emails from an Asshole website from John Lindsay.
![Hello,
I was wondering if anyone had time to try and complete my maze while considering bringing back cocktail-sized Jewish Rye.
The ground caraway was awesome, because it isn't a potential diverticulitis disaster like whole seeds are.
My wife wpuld [sic] use it to make this delicious lemon pepper cheese appetizer, and I like to make tiny Reuben sandwiches and pretend I am a reformed King King that no longer has to eat people sacrificed to me on Skull Island.
The mini pumpernickel is cool just because of the etymology. I mean? It has to be the most metal bread out there.
How can you discontinue such wonderful things?](https://aixelsyd13.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/wp-1674692091553.jpg?w=220)
World (and Lunar) Domination 