Gig Checklists

Inspired by a post called Gig Preparation, I thought I’d make some checklists.  I think we’ll need one (and a half) for our stuff, one for setting up the gig, and one for doing stuff at the gig.  The lists would change depending on who’s working the gig or who set it up, but you should be able to help with the flow of things even if you’re not the organizer.  This is also from the point of view of a guitar player, because that’s all I’ve ever been.  I’m guessing it would be the same for a bass player & quite similar for a drummer.

Gig Checklists…

-·♠·-

Before the gig:

☐ Get all the details in order:

☐ The bands
☐ The place
☐ The time
☐ The price
☐ All ages or 21+
☐ Is it a benefit?
☐ Any specials if it’s a bar?
☐ Selling tickets?

.
☐ Promote!

☐ …using social media – Link the crap out of details/event pages.
☐ Flyers – Hang ’em up, pass ’em out.
☐ Word of mouth

.
☐ Communicate with the other bands…

☐ Sharing equipment? – Cut down on changeovers between bands.
☐ Playing order?

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☐ Do you need your own door person?

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Stuff to take:

☐ Guitar – In a case or gig bag, I actually saw a guy use a bath-towel once.
☐ Backup guitar(s) – Don’t kill the show when you break a string.
☐ Amp head & cab (or combo)
☐ The merch box(es)
☐ Your gig backpack or briefcase. (“What’s that.” you ask? Keep reading!)

.

|·| |·| |·| |·| | |:|  |  | · |   | · |   | · |  | · |   |   |

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I make sure to have my backpack full o’ stuff with me at every gig.  Over the years, every item in it has proved useful and one time or another.

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In The Gig Backpack or Briefcase:

☐ Tuner (Get a pedal one, so no one can hear you tune.)
☐ Wireless system (Certainly not a necessity, but fun.)
☐ 9V battery (Are the lithium ones OK for pedals?)
☐ Guitar cables (1 more than you need)
☐ Speaker cables (1 more than you need)
☐ Strings (At least a full set, …any leftovers you’ve got should be in there.)
☐ Extra power cord
☐ Power Strip (w/ Circuit Breaker)
☐ 3-Prong to 2-Prong adapter (or 2)
☐ Duct Tape or Gaff Tape (or both… Gaff doesn’t leave a mess.)
☐ Tablet (Setlists, Merch Prices, Boredom)
☐ A sharpie or 2 (Setlists, Rock Star Autographs)
☐ A Leatherman-type tool. (Crazy or not-so crazy.)
☐ Guitar picks (I use Jim Dunlop Fins.)

☐ An Extra Strap

☐ Flashlight (A really bright one helps)
☐ Extension Cord

[::( )::]

Stuff that I don’t have, but might be a good idea…

☐ Pedal(s) – Wah, Distortion, Foot Switch, Etc.
☐ Mic clip(s)
☐ String Winder
☐ Pick strip or holder

☐ Slide / eBow / Capo

☐ Strap locks

☐ Trem poker
☐ Ear plugs

☐ Nail clippers
☐ acetaminophen / ibuprofen / aspirin

☐ Band-aids
☐ Cloth or towel

.

\m/_(-_-)_\m/

At the gig:

☐ Set stuff on the stage for the 1st band & any bands sharing
☐ Backline the “main” act if there is one & set up in front of them.

☐ Tune (Silently! – No one likes the tuning song! – Tune your backup guitar too.)
☐ Let the Sound Technician do their job.
☐ Set up a Merch Table/Corner/Counter/Box.
☐ Put your door person at the door.

☐ Using a setlist? Reach into that backpack & get one made!

☐ Have a drink? Water, Beer, or something harder.

☐ Tune Again (Silently! – No one likes the tuning song!)

☐ Unless you’re awesome & have a tech, get a string-wingman.

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I’m sure there’s stuff I’m forgetting, but I think this is a pretty decent start.  What do you think I’m missing from the list?  Do you have an emergency gig kit?  What’s in it?

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Bathroom Attendants.

I’d just like to go on record saying I don’t like bathroom attendants.  I’ve been to two venues lately that have had them, the Diesel Club Lounge & the Altar Bar.  My run-in last night at the Altar Bar was odd.  I went into the stall to relieve myself, and came out to the faucet running, a dude squirting soap in my hands, and handing me some towels when I was done.  It’s odd to have someone do something for me that I could have easily done myself.

Imagine you’re walking down the street and your shoe comes untied, I run up to tie your shoe, & expect a tip.  I would be met with a resounding “WTF?” because I wasn’t asked to help.  Yet, I helped you, and you had no choice.  Odd there.  Odd in the bathroom.

We can suspend the general “stage fright” issue, knowing it’s weird that there’s a dude standing less than 10 feet away, but it is a public bathroom so there’s always that distraction.  It’s just the other guys are there doing the same thing as you, not offering any services.

Poop-flavored candy, cakes, & gum!

Speaking of offering services… No, I don’t want any gum, candy, Swiss cake rolls, or honey buns that have been sitting in the bathroom.  Can’t you at least put that part right outside the door?  I don’t generally have food in my bathroom at home…. why would I want it anywhere else?  How many foul smells & horrible germs must those foods absorb before you’re able to sell them?  I’m not a smoker, but I’m guessing that people who are also don’t want cigarettes that smell like they were pulled out of a sewer.

Why are you trying to sell me food in the bathroom?  No, I don’t need cologne or deodorant, or anything else.  When I’m urinating, it’s my own special alone time.  I don’t need to chat or dine afterwards to celebrate.

Thank goodness I didn’t need to defecate last night.  Who wants to poop with someone hanging out ready to smell that?  Not to be disgusting, but we all do it, and we all know it smells horrible sometimes.  Who the hell wants to stand in a room selling absorbent little cakes while that’s going on?  (Would he build a nest for me?  Is that guy ready to wipe & wet-nap my ass too?  Do you have to tip extra for that?)

I can see the plus sides… perhaps a person in there deters people from being general pigs, graffiti, illicit activities, and promotes hand-washing.  They probably never run out of towels, soap, or toilet paper.  But, really, why not just check on things periodically and put up a sign.

Do these attendants get paid, or do they work only for tips & poop-flavored candy sales?  How does one get a position as a urination supervision specialist?

Shouldn’t I have a chance to refuse their services entirely if it creeps me out?

Where & why did this all start?

We live by Carnegie Mellon, can’t someone make some robots for this job that aren’t creepy & that don’t require tips?

Enlighten me.

Related articles

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I hate public bathrooms.

Image by StartTheDay via Flickr

Well, I’m sure everyone does to a certain extent.  I hate them for the obvious reasons of comfort/germs/privacy just like (I’d imagine) everyone else.  I mean, everyone would rather do business on their own throne & all alone, am I right?

I hate public facilities for other reasons that are somehow more annoying than the obvious…

• They’re never stocked properly.  Okay, I guess this one’s obvious.  Sorry.  Perhaps I should also say “rarely” instead of “never”, but I’m ranting here.  If something’s not out completely, the dispenser is jammed which is worse because it’s there but you can’t get to it.  Soap? Toilet paper? Hand towels?  Who needs ’em, right?
• TP Quality.  If I can see through it and  have to go bad enough that I’m actually pooping in a public bathroom, you can guarantee that I’m going to wad it so much that you should have just bought the better stuff anyway.
• The “hey we cleaned it 10 min. ago” sign-in sheets.  Yeah, “cleaned”.
• Sink design.  There seem to be a lot of sink designers out there that have never actually washed their hands.  When the faucet hangs about 2 inches over a sink basin with a large slope… my knuckles are hitting porcelain and my palms remain dry until I pull some contortionist-like moves that should probably get me into the Olympics.  Did no one think about that when the bathrooms were being built or remodeled?  No one has tried the sink out, regardless of the inevitable “Employees Must Wash Hands” sign?  Perhaps I am doing it wrong.  Is there a secret?  If there is a better way, I am but your humble student.
• Water.  It’s never quite right, is it?  Scalding, freezing… a minor inconvenience I guess.  Most public sinks that I encounter have the all-on-splash-my-shirt setting and the just-above-a-drip setting with not much in between.  I’ll also mention the “oh no I leaned on the counter and it looks like I peed my pants” moment here.  The auto-sinks at Walmart stores feel like there’s a tiny elf with an eyedropper in there just waiting to wash your hands.
• Foam soap is just terrible.  Quit it already.  I’m over it, and you should be too.  It dissipates so quickly & leaves my hands feeling either not clean at all at best or almost sticky at worst.  The watered-down liquid soap that was used regularly well into the late 90’s and early 00’s is just fine.
• Technology isn’t your friend.   I’m the last person to run a tirade against technology.  But sometimes, the more there is to it, the more there is to go wrong.
• The auto-flush toilet was probably the first to appear.  While noble, I have perfected my boot-flush and elbow-flush techniques… so I don’t need it, even if it does work.  Everyone’s heard the tale of someone who was auto-flushed upon amid doing business on the john.  No one wants to be the victim there, right?  Especially of the ones that look like a mini hurricane in a bowl.
• The Hand Dryer.  I believe the correct ratio is 1 out of every 3 hand dryers (hot or cool) actually functions.  I haven’t done any studies, and I’m not sure if this is the factory QC acceptance level, but it seems about right.  I’m saying 1 out of 5 for the no-button auto kind.  You can quote me on this.
• The hands-free paper towel dispenser.  Jammed, not working, empty, gives a 3″ square or enough to dry 1 finger… then takes 10 minutes to give you enough for the next finger.  So much here to go wrong.
• The hands-free soap dispenser.  There’s no soap in it, because it’s all on the floor.  Or, if it’s an in-sink unit, there’s always a bottle of Softsoap or Dial there because the in sink unit is always empty or broken.
• The hands-free sink.  See my previous comment about elves & eye droppers.  It also helps if the elf isn’t sleeping.
• Pfft.  The auto your-ass-stinks dispensers make it smell like poop and flowers.  That helps.
• What’s next?  Someday there will be butt-wiping robots or poo-burning laser beams.  I’d like to go on record now as voting against this.
• The pee trough.  These are rare nowadays, thank goodness.
• The Surprise.  Unfortunately you know what I’m talking about.  Stop it, people.
• The trash can.  Full or overflowing?  Yes.  The in-sink or in-wall ones are a joke.
• The multi-tasker.  I don’t want to hear you on your phone while you’re pooping.  The person on the other end doesn’t want to talk to you while you’re pooping.  I don’t want to talk to you while I’m pooping.  Phones and pooping do not mix.
• The dweller.  What’s with people that just hang out in restrooms?  What are you doing besides making me nervous?  If you’re not using the facilities or freshening up… get out.

What did I miss?  I’m sure something in public restrooms annoys you too.  What is it?  Am I wrong with any of the above statements?  Have any horror stories?  Hit me with comments…

Earthquake Relief Hygiene Kits

So, in the wake of everything that’s just happened in Japan, and still in support of the recent events in Haiti, a local UCC cluster (and more specifically, my church: ERUCC) is collecting the contents of hygiene kits to be sent to those in need.

Here’s what’s needed:

Hygiene Kit Instructions

This year at our Wednesday Evening UCC Cluster Lenten Service we will be receiving a precious offering. In the face of natural disasters, violence, or grinding poverty, Hygiene Kits can mean the difference between sickness and health for struggling families.

To assemble a Hygiene Kit you will need:

• One hand towel measuring approximately 16″ x 28″ (no fingertip or bath towels and new towels only)
• One new washcloth
• One wide-tooth comb (Must be wide-tooth and one comb per package-available at Target, Wal-mart and other discount stores)
• One new nail clipper
• One bar of soap (bath size in wrapper)
• One toothbrush (in original packaging-only one per package)
• Six standard size Band-Aids®

Place all items in a one-gallon plastic bag with a zipper closure, remove excess air from bag, and seal. Please do not add toothpaste to the Hygiene Kit. Cartons of toothpaste that have an extended expiration date will be added to Hygiene Kit shipments just prior to shipment.

I personally like the fact that we can donate concrete items knowing that it will have a direct impact, and even if you can only afford to put together one kit or even part of a kit… you know that it will go directly to someone in need.

If you can get the kits to me, I’ll see that they get to the church, or you can drop them off/send them directly to:

Emmanuel Reformed United Church of Christ
3618 Hills Church Road
Export, PA  15632-9371

Thanks & please spread the word!