I know most online Aldi groups call it the Aisle of Shame. Can you get through the maze without going there?
There are some crazy Aldi fans in Facebook groups out there. There are some people who like mazes out there. Is there much of an overlap?
It’s really that simple. You can even skip the printing and solve it on your phone or tablet usong a note app or photo editor if so inclined.
I certainly don’t need another guitar. I’m always looking at them though. There are just so many different kinds out there, and I can appreciate almost all of them. Some I actually sort of drool over, & eventually I end up with one. I don’t think 13 Guitars in 2013 will ever become a reality. I can always add cool guitars to my Pinterest board, right?
These are some that I’m always thinking about…
Epiphone USA Map Guitar
Like this…
The Epiphone USA Map Guitar – It has to be ridiculously cumbersome to play, but no more than my Galveston B.B. Stone. The brown finish is neat, but I’d love it to look like an old-school pastel textbook map of the USA. They pop up on ebay every once in a while, but none are ever priced low enough that I feel it’s a “must buy” because I’ll never see the same deal again. There are other companies that make them too. I’m not picky, I just like the shape & the idea. It would certainly be a fun one on stage.
Fernandes Ravelle
Deluxe
The Fernandes Ravelle – I’d like any of them really, but the green Dave Kushner model is awesome. I dig the green color, and the sweet pick guard with holes in it. I love how it takes the classic Les Paul shape, and makes it a little Alien. The curves are awesome. I dig the sound too, on the Velvet Revolver albums & live show. I’ve seen a few in action at shows around here, but I’ve only seen one for sale at Guitar Center in Robinson. I almost dropped more money than I could afford on it… it was only around $500 which seemed reasonable. Sadly, I made a sound financial decision that day.
Fretlight Guitar
Fretlight® Guitar – It seems like it would just be really fun to play with one. I might even learn a scale other than the pentatonic with one. I like the old school one with the knobs & switches. I don’t know if I’d even gig out with it, unless you could program it to make a cool light show or spell out the name of your band or something tasteless & offensive on the fretboard. Maybe even the word “POOP” because, well, that’s always funny.
Hallmark Guitars Wing-Bat
Hallmark Guitars Wing-Bat – Or the George Barris Batman guitar. I’ll probably never have enough money to own this thing, but it sure is cool. No Batmobile beats the 60’s Batmobile… and this thing looks like it was in the trunk all along. If anyone has one that needs a good home, let me know. I’ll play it & take care of it quite well. I’d gig out with it too. It’s a shame when these collector guitars hit a shelf somewhere never to be played again.
DIPinto Mach IV
DiPinto Mach IV – One of my favorite guitars playersplays one of these sweet-looking axes. It’s very eye-catching. It’s almost like a Mosrite, but not quite. Gel from The Eyeliners is one hell of a guitar player, & the reason I want one. I’m generally not a fan of red guitars, but with this… I’d like a red one.
Annihilator
Annihilator copy by Oktober Guitars – I’m not nearly as cool as Doyle, but I’d love to play one… being a Misfits Fiend for all these years. I’m not sure I’ll ever have $600 lying around for a guitar that I wouldn’t play all the time.
I do also want a bunch of other stuff that’s not so specific. I’d love to have a hollowbody, something like an Ibanez Artstar/Artcore or Epiphone Flamekat. I’d love a custom Millennium Falcon guitar. I’d love one of Tom Bingham’s creations like the Record guitar or suitcase guitar. I like weird stuff, like the Bigfoot Guitar or the Electric Ant Farm guitar.
I’d like a translucent guitar. I did want one of those lime green BC Rich models that were out a while back. They had them in Warlock, Bich or Mockingbird styles, but I’m not sure I could pull that off. I’d also like a see-through Galveston (or any “off “brand) Les Paul or Telecaster. A translucent guitar with LED’s in it would be incredibly fun.
I would like a Fender Toronado or Gibson Firebrand too. Maybe any sort of double-neck or even a 6-string banjo. I’m sure there are other guitars out there that I want that I just don’t know about.
Check out my Guitars Board on Pinterest for an ever-evolving list.
What’s on your wish-list?
The other day, this Facebook status fell on deaf ears.
So, I ask again:
Party Light
Ever see those colored light bulbs in the store labeled “Party Lights”? I must have been invited to the wrong parties all these years. I have never been to a party with party lights. Please, if you’ve been to (or thrown) one of these zany-lighting parties… tell me what it’s like!
G.E.® Party Light Bulbs in Various Colors – 6 Pack – Standard Incandescent Bulbs
Every time I go to a Walmart, Target, Kmart, etc. I’m driven slightly mad. Sure, part of it is because of the stores themselves or the employees who seem to be rather uninterested in working… But most of the problem is the other shoppers. I was going to put a percentage on it, but I’m not sure I can. I think is a small percentage of idiots with a largely negative impact. Well, idiot just implies that they’re stupid. I think it’s more inconsiderate than stupid. I’m talking about people who are generally unaware of the needs, thoughts, and feelings of everyone around them. The best word that I can think of (even though I generally try to avoid being vulgar in print) is asshole. We all know what kind of person that describes. If I owned/ran a department store, I would try to prevent the behavior that goes with this type of personality.
Parking Lot
Curbing unacceptable behavior would start in the parking lot (pun intended). One of my favorite blogs calls these people “Peter Parkers.” They’re where the problem begins. If your jackass behavior can’t make it through the parking lot, we’ll hope you don’t even bother to come in to the store. Whether we’re talking about people driving & parking the wrong way in one way lanes, people who park over the lines, people who don’t slow down/stop at cross-walks, or people who park in handicapped spaces or on the line-covered spaces near the handicapped spaces. That’s just the drivers… Don’t forget that people need to learn how to walk to their car in a parking lot too.
Crossing Guard
To curtail all of this inconsiderate conduct we’d have meter maids, crossing guards, and cameras. I guess the meter maids wouldn’t have meters to read, they’d just be parking enforcers. Cars parked over painted lines, at curbs, or in handicapped spaces without proper tags will be towed. Immediately. I’m saying we’d go after them mere seconds after it happens, perhaps as their door is being shut. The parking enforcers wouldn’t be like the people on that TV show where they argue. They’d just do their job. I’d have a tow truck or two on site at all times. I have no tolerance for people who think that rules somehow don’t apply to themselves. (I’m talking about inconsequential rules here like how to conduct yourself in society. I think it’s always good to question authority & what not… but that doesn’t apply here where you’re just being a self-indulgent dolt.)
People entering & exiting the store wouldn’t have the free reign to walk out into oncoming traffic. Somehow (here in PA at least) people have taken “pedestrians have the right of way” to the extreme, where the actual law is that they have the right of way in crosswalks. Everywhere else, you’re fair game. A crossing-guard would facilitate safe passage and at the same prevent a traffic jam like you get in the front of every Walmart or Giant Eagle when an endless stream of lackadaisical shoppers lumber slowly in front of you without glancing in your direction as you sit in your auto waiting for a break in the action. If the people who like to park wherever they please or run into oncoming traffic with faith in an imaginary no-fault law somehow don’t feel welcome in my department store, then good. We’ve successfully weeded out the first wave of assholes. If they have learned to conduct themselves in a respectful manner while spending time in my controlled outdoor environment, then let ’em in!
Amish parking
(Oh yeah, bicycles would have their own parking lot… they’d share it with buggies & horses in Amish country, and buses would roll to the edge of the parking lot, not right to the front door causing endless amounts of chaos.)
Inside the store, we’d have checkout lines like the bank, Wendy’s, or Best Buy. People can be incredibly ignorant when it comes to getting in line. It’s certainly not everyone, but there are a select few who ruin it for everyone else. See any McDonalds or Sheetz without the rope at lunch time. It’s absolute chaos.
Queue Area
I know they’re not department stores… but it’s easier to see the same behavior there as it’s more concentrated. It would eliminate getting into line behind the people who want to put things back, use expired coupons, write checks, talk on their phones, shop for everything in the impulse-buy section, or search for their method of payment long after everything is rung up.
In fact, no checks. All it does is slow things down. It’s 2012. It’s almost 2013. If you have a bank account, you have a debt card or credit card, some of them are even called check cards now. Use it. Don’t use that antiquated paper log-book that does nothing but slow things down for everyone.
In my store, there would be no greeter that avoids eye contact completely or looks at you like you’re the grim reaper come to take them to hell. Maybe there would be a robot there to say hello. At least a robot could fake sincerity more efficiently.
Even though it doesn’t have to do with behavior exactly, the restrooms would have faucets in the sinks (with hot water) that you can fit your hands under, paper towels that are actually stocked regularly, hand dryers that actually dry your hands, and soap. No foam soap, no hand sanitizer, no bathroom attendants to do it for you. It might put people in a better mood if they can be comfortable.
I’m sure there are many other things I’d have to put in place, and many other bad customer behavior… but these are the ones I can think of now.
What would you do to make a trip to a department store more tolerable? Would you enjoy it if stores weeded out the a-holes? Are you one of the people who behaves like an a-hole by parking in the wrong spots, jumping to lines in front of people, and walking like an idiot in the parking lot? Please, share your thoughts in the comments section below!
last minute shoppers. (Photo credit: the idealist)
I’m not an architect, or a contractor, or even a toilet salesman… but I think I’ve found a flaw in a certain type of hotel room / bathroom setup. I’m no germaphobe, but I believe this design to be quite unsanitary.
What design? The sink outside of the bathroom design.
Sure, it’s convenient to shave or brush your teeth while someone else is pooping or showering… But at what cost do we purchase this convenience? The cost of a bazillion tiny germs all over the inside of the door handle after you wipe and before you wash your hands. Sure, you can grab an extra wad of toilet paper for your journey outside. How many people do that though? How much microscopic fecal matter is already on that door handle? Did the maid think to wipe it down? What if you forget after you get out of the shower? You just washed yourself, and now your hand may venture into a feculent festival of filth.
Am I doing something wrong here? Am I missing something? Let’s get this right so I don’t have to touch poop-encrusted (albeit microbial poop) door handles.
Did you read the email that I sent to them?
I see this email reply as an (incredibly boring) invitation to go in to your local Best Buy & monkey around with everything. Especially the alarm clocks. Does Best Buy even sell alarm clocks any more? If they do, do set them all to go off at weird intervals after hours… or even 10 or 15 minutes before they close. If they’re clock radios, put them on the classical station or talk radio. Do it on the demo cell phones if you can too.
This was their only [yawn] reply:
From: online.communities <online.communities@bestbuy.com>
Date: Fri, Jun 8, 2012 at 12:05 PM
Subject: RE: A Formal Apology
To: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>Hello,
We always encourage you, our customer, to come in and look around or even test out our products, so you know what you like or don’t like about them. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us and I’ll be sure to pass this along to our Leadership Team.
Respectfully,
Justin|Community Connector
Corporate Campus
Online.Communities@BestBuy.com
I guess they didn’t “get” it, or find it amusing. Of course setting all the alarm clocks is an innocuous thing to do at best, but I was acting like it was a big deal. That’s why (I thought) it was funny. Wow. Best Buy popped my funny balloon.
What a boring dud.
English: Vintage clock radio (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
<shameless plug> Oh yeah, while you’re at it… set all the browsers to http://www.ErnieAndTheBerts.com, too. </shameless plug>
Well, I sent what I thought were going to be two rather fun emails, but they have both gone unanswered. Wow. What a giant dud. As my wife constantly reminds me, I certainly find myself amusing. So, in that spirit I thought I’d share these emails anyway. Perhaps you’ll chuckle too.
The first was to Best Buy via their form online and to the Twelpforce email address:
From: Waldo Lunar <world.and.lunar.domination@gmail.com>
Date: Thu, May 31, 2012
Subject: A Formal Apology
To: twelpforce@bestbuy.comGreetings Best Buy Associates,
I write to you today to offer a formal apology. I have lived with guilt for many years, and I would like to be able to clear my conscience. Sadly, you literally asked for what you got, but you certainly didn’t deserve it my friends. I beg you in advance to not unleash the wrath of the Twelpforce or Geek Squad upon my humble self.
Do you remember the commercials from about ten or so years ago that begged one to come in & play with all of the electronics in the store? Well, I said you asked for it. You did. I simply complied.
I went into one of your stores, and tried my best to restrain my maniacal laughter as I set all of the alarm clocks & clock radios to go off at different intervals after the store closed. Some were 5 minutes, some where 10 or even 20. It was incredibly hard to stifle my giggles and pretend like I was incredibly interested in these timepieces. I don’t know how no one noticed. Now I can’t get 10 feet into a Best Buy door without a blue-shirted hawk swooping in to ask if I need help, and I’ll get asked every 3 feet after that if I turn it down. Perhaps shenanigans like mine are why?
At one time, I wished that I could have been around to see the chaos. Okay, maybe I still do. Perhaps a master switch would have cut the power to all of them after the first one went off. I won’t pretend to know the internal machinations of such a colossal retail empire. Perhaps I made a memory for that team and brought them together through adversity in the name of silencing alarm clocks. Perhaps it is a good story to tell trainees, or it may have even been forgotten over time. I was much younger & more brash then. I thought I knew everything. I thought the world was my playground. To be blunt, I was an arrogant young miscreant. I don’t remember if it was planned, or spur of the moment.
I’m sure that when the internet was still “new”, I set more than a few of your browsers to my old band’s web page & walked away. I did this in every store though, not just Best Buy. I won’t apologize for that. A pimp’s got to pimp, right?
I would like to offer an apology to Best Buy as a corporation, the Best Buy employees startled and/or annoyed that day (and their families), and to all of the Best Buy associates that have joined the team since that day (somewhere between 2000 and 2002). I believe this was at the Greensburg PA location across from Westmoreland Mall. Please pass this along to them, if there are any left that may have been working that day. I have seen the err of my ways, and I can live with the guilt no longer!
Thank you for your time, I hope you find it within you to pass along forgiveness for this egregious behavior.
Regretfully,
-Waldo Lunar
The next one was to Bed Bath & Beyond via their webform:
Do you remember those Best Buy commercials from 10 or so years ago where they asked you to come in & try the stuff out?
I did. I went in one night & set all of their alarm clocks to go off about 5, 10, 15, or 20 minutes after closing. I bet it was hilarious. I only wish I had been there to see it. I bet that happened often.
I noticed that you have a lot of kitchen timers and egg timers. What time do you close?
Thanks,
-Waldo
I thought it was funny. Apparently Best Buy and Bed Bath & Beyond did not. I did get the standard “we got your message, someone will write back with in 3 days” replies, over a week ago. I really thought Best Buy would come out with a witty intelligent retort. You’d think an electronics company would be helmed by geeks who found humor in such ridiculousness. Bed Bath & Beyond apparently do not go too far into the beyond part. Oh well.
Best Buy (Photo credit: Ron Dauphin)
Bed Bath and Beyond (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
You must read this blog by Omawarisan, he swears that this is the only photo he’s ever taken in a public restroom:
Employees Must Wash Hands « Blurt.
I propose a revolution where these signs are strictly adhered to.
We all know my feelings on public restrooms, hand-washing signs, bathroom attendants, and stupid signs in general. Omiwarisan takes it to the next level. I applaud his ingenuity and regularly enjoy his blog. You should check it out.
Check out this sweet post (& the rest of the blog) from Guitar WTF?: I Miss My Corner Guitar Store « Guitar WTF.
A sample:
…At first I was mad, but then I though it would be more fun to get even. Yeah, I know, its immature.
How To Be Annoying At The Guitar Store
- When a sales person is talking to another customer listen in. After everything they say you say, “that’s what you think”.
- Ask the sales person for a pick, immediately put it in your pocket and leave the store.
Six Flags Batman Logo Guitar - Added strap from ebay, strap locks, DR Neon yellow strings, and Seymour Duncan SH-6 Distortion pickups.
With the purchase of my new-found New York Pro, and some recent tweaking of the Batman Logo guitar by Aaron at Lawrence Music, I have guitar fever. Well, more than normal.
I have a few guitar related questions/subjects that I just want to get out there. I really need feedback on these, so please let me know your thoughts in the comments here below… not on Twitter, Facebook, Google+, or wherever I happen to share this link.
Here’s my list, but I know there are more good “secret” ones…
Or when you’re traveling… Any shops with killer deals, cool people, great gear, etc.? I’ve noticed more “We Buy Gold” stores popping up with guitars in the window in the Pittsburgh area. Has anyone checked those out yet? I know I was in one of the Pawn Shops on East Ohio Street one time helping my cousin find a guitar… and this old cat took us down some old shady-looking stairs to this long dark room filled with nothing but guns and guitars. I felt like I was in a movie.
I dig these stores…
I know others exist. What are your favorites and why? There are sadly a few that I’ve driven past, but haven’t been in. You may help me decide to go there.
I generally try to keep up with these sites…
GuitarSquid.com | Flow Chart: Do You Have Too Many Guitars?
I’m guessing that if it did exist, I’d already know about it. When looking at the sub-par guitars online, sometimes there’s not always a good closeup of the headstock… you can make out the 1st letter of the logo or the shape of the headstock… but not the full name. It’s be cool to see an ever-growing list. Most sites I’ve seen resort to “other” before “add”.
There are good lists at About.com, Wikipedia, and (of course) Harmony Central… but they’re not complete. I also just stumbled upon the Guitar List. Perhaps that will be “the one” someday?
I think I have another blog brewing about the insanity that is off-brand guitars & companies like Galveston that don’t seem to exist.
I’d really like to hear about all your favorite guitar-related stuff in the comments below. If it goes well, there will be others. I’d like to talk about modifications some time too.
World (and Lunar) Domination 